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Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill, Cary The Triangle Area
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Old 05-13-2014, 07:04 PM
 
Location: Under the Carolina Blue Sky
420 posts, read 450,211 times
Reputation: 562

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Andyrv View Post
By the way my heritage is from the Caribbean which I am strongly tied to. I've experienced nothing but a lot of cultural ties up until recent times so I'm just trying to wrap my head around that comment that's all. Not looking to start a debate. ;-)
I understand Andyrv...thank you for contributing all the other things that were floating around in my head. The triangle is indeed multi-cultural. I wouldn't be here otherwise. BTW, one of my closest friends is from the Caribbean
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Old 05-13-2014, 07:46 PM
 
222 posts, read 403,215 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SonoCucuzza View Post
Thank you, once again, to all of you.

I think that my fiance and I both acknowledge that we won't find the same sort of "northeast Italian-American culture" in the south, but our fear is simply in not being able to find an outlet of any kind. It sounds like the area is a blend of many cultures, and therefore I would imagine there are some Italians/Sicilians, much in the same way I am sure there are some Irish, Jewish, German, and Latino populations (to some extent). We embrace diversity in every way, we simply don't want to be left out in the cold from the warmth of our own culture which we love and embrace. Our reservations, quite frankly, are more for our children and future children. The best part of our childhoods was being immersed in our culture; attending festivals, special masses, embracing cultural celebrations, and embracing the camaraderie that came with it. At times, for us, it sometimes felt like our summers in Sicily were no different than our winters in America. I suppose, on some level, it is more about losing that experience for our children publicly, even if we provide it at home. But, that is neither here nor there, since that is something we would need to reconcile on our own, and can't really find answers to here in a forum.
No doubt you're Italian just from how wordy your posts are.

I'm a 3rd gen Italian, and seeking to preserve the culture and your children's exposure to it isn't really up to you. It's up to them. My parents and grand parents did everything in their power to impress it upon me, and there were aspects I enjoyed and aspects for which I cared very little. If I want to be immersed in Italian culture, I get on a plane and head to Italy. I try to do it every other year and plan on buying an apartment in Florence or the Amalfi coast at some point. My point is, don't let your desire for your children to grow up with that influence impact where you decide to live. Worry more for their educational opportunities and the community at large.

I moved here in June of last year and I've got more vowels than consonants in my last name. No one has ever given me (or my name) a second look. I don't anticipate you'll have any issues with that. I moved from a much deeper part of the south than NC, and my Italian name/heritage has never been a problem for me.

I frequent some Italian restaurants in the triangle which are owned by natives of Rome and Florence.

You can get a Ducati. I've seen Ferraris and Lamborghinis on the streets. We have pizza, pasta, gnocchi, buffala mozzarella, etc. But there's no community here as you describe. You may want to consider Charleston, SC. It's an amazing southern city.

They celebrate the Spoleto Festival.

Good luck.
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Old 05-13-2014, 08:03 PM
 
Location: Raleigh, NC
2,541 posts, read 5,465,079 times
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Two points that have probably been said but are worth repeating:

1- This area is incredibly tolerant and diverse. I absolutely love that about it.

2- Never move someplace for financial reasons unless you are comparing no income and losing everything to a job offer. My husband had a really good professional opportunity in another state and we moved solely for that reason. It was a disaster. The culture was so different and so not us. We were miserable and moved back as soon as we could.
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Old 05-14-2014, 08:12 AM
 
87 posts, read 135,082 times
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All of these answers have been both extensive and valuable; thank you to all, once again.

It really offers us valuable insight to have opinions provided from native southerns, northeast transplants, and other Italian-Americans. It allows us to create a picture of the lifestyle there (in the most preliminary of terms). Certainly the northeast is different, in terms of concentrated ethnic communities, and we don't expect to find that again. In fact, we embrace the benefits of experiencing something new and learning more about ourselves and others as a result. I suppose, really, it is more about identity than community. As Tri-Love made reference to, it is really about being able to continue to nurture our heritage and identity without feeling isolated. Isolation is is the "fear factor" here. Our home will always echo of Sinatra, smell of olive oil and herbs, and foster our love of all things Italian. It is simply the hope that we will be able to find a small group of people in the south who can not only share in those things with us, but perhaps more importantly, understand them and embrace them as we do. That's all.

My fiance attended university in Vermont; a state almost completely devoid of an Italian American presence. He struggled quite a bit at first, until he got a night job working as a cook at a local restaurant. There, he found himself working alongside an older Sicilian man with whom he became quick friends. Because they were able to share in the language, the culture, the faith, and the understanding of each others community and behavioral tendencies, my fiance was suddenly much happier in Vermont. It only took one really valuable cultural connection for him to begin to really enjoy his time there. He made many friends, and had many teammates, of different cultural, ethnic, and racial backgrounds, and he loved them all. However, he didn't ever feel as if he "belonged" until he started working in that restaurant. I don't know if that makes sense at all to each of you, but that is sort of what we're hoping for; a small community which allows us have some friends who understand us effortlessly, all the while still living somewhere where we can learn from a new and diverse community.

As to the comment pertaining to relocating somewhere for financial reasons; I agree, to an extent. We would never move only for financial reasons. If we did that, or intended to do that, I wouldn't be here asking questions. We would just move to Alabama, buy a big, beautiful house for 350K (that would cost close to a million in Boston or New York), and pay next to nothing in property taxes (compared to the northeast). Instead, the motivation for our move is financial due to the reduced housing costs and miniscule tax burdens. For us it is a beneficial move because my fiances income stays the same no matter where he lives in the U.S., thus there is no income adjustment. Our hope is that we can narrow our search to 3 or 4 potential landing spots based on financial benefits and research (including these valuable forums), then visit each of them, and see if any one of them really speaks to us.

Thanks again to everyone. You really have been most helpful.
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Old 05-14-2014, 08:19 AM
 
Location: Durm
7,104 posts, read 11,571,271 times
Reputation: 8050
Quote:
Originally Posted by SonoCucuzza View Post
Our home will always echo of Sinatra, smell of olive oil and herbs, and foster our love of all things Italian. It is simply the hope that we will be able to find a small group of people in the south who can not only share in those things with us, but perhaps more importantly, understand them and embrace them as we do. That's all.
That sounds so lovely. And, you both seem like completely lovely people. Best of luck to you!
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Old 05-14-2014, 10:56 AM
 
Location: Vero Beach, Fl.
596 posts, read 1,237,351 times
Reputation: 384
As a Italian/American myself ( NYC born & raised ) "my opinion" this may not be the best match for you, as I feel the same. Very limited Italian deli type places to buy the foods you would greatly miss coming from the Northeast. I will leave it to that, having been bashed, on this topic before, best of luck to you paisan.....
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Old 05-14-2014, 03:00 PM
 
Location: Under the Carolina Blue Sky
420 posts, read 450,211 times
Reputation: 562
Default Agree

Quote:
Originally Posted by NorasMom View Post
That sounds so lovely. And, you both seem like completely lovely people. Best of luck to you!
I agree!

OP, I want you to know that I volunteer to be your connection should you decide to come to the triangle!
I cook a lot and my house all smells like garlic and olive oil.

I know Vermont well and the example you described about your fiancé tells me that you totally get what I was trying to say. I have not found an Italian connection here and I would love to. In fact, it is quite new to me to meet many ppl here who never knew an Italian before. On the otherhand, there are so many wonderful things about being in the south...

Your post was lovely as I am sure you and your family are. I sincerely wish you all the best!
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Old 05-14-2014, 03:03 PM
 
2,924 posts, read 3,330,283 times
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While I do not think you are going to find a close knit Italian community here, I think you will find other Italian Americans. If you will not feel settled without a network with that specific commonality then this maybe a struggle for you.

Ironically, I was at Beaver Creek Commons today and saw a license plate that read "DOVE VAI". I thought is was great!
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Old 05-14-2014, 03:21 PM
 
Location: Under the Carolina Blue Sky
420 posts, read 450,211 times
Reputation: 562
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sal_M View Post

Ironically, I was at Beaver Creek Commons today and saw a license plate that read "DOVE VAI". I thought is was great!
That is so cool! See, there are some of us around!
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Old 05-14-2014, 03:53 PM
 
Location: Cary
2,863 posts, read 4,668,148 times
Reputation: 3466
Outside of the Italian community thing, this is a great place to live. But, who knows...there are a lot of Italians here, especially with the transplants from the NE, so who's to say a community of sorts won't gel together in the future? In the mean time, who's up for some Bocce ball?
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