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Old 01-09-2008, 10:20 AM
FMD FMD started this thread
 
15 posts, read 61,489 times
Reputation: 24

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I am divorce and I have had 50/50 Custody of my 6 year old Son with my Ex for the past 2 years; I was ok with it some how since I had to work and support myself and my Son (I put my son to the private school and he didn't pay a Penny and later he tried to use my work schedule as a negative thing (that I was working and he was the one that took care of our son.....)Somebody had to make $$$and pay the bills!!!!!!!

In the past few months I have been engaged and my Fiancé is supporting us 100% and I no longer go to work now and I have much more time to spend with my son and my family. My Ex has shown how snicky he has been in last few months especially since I got engaged and how much he takes advantage of us, and tries to make our life as hard as possible. And truly he has not been good for my son's well being.....

He has been living with the woman now that has 2 kids, 9 and 11 years and he went with her because she has a House and Money and this way he no longer has to file for Bankruptcy (can tell what kind a man he is)
He doesn't pay child support and even when our son is with him, he always makes him wear his cousin or his girl friend son's clothes.
I have been putting my son to the Swimming classes, Basketball, Horse back riding, Camps and ... My Fiancé pays for them happily and my Ex, he never participates (he says he doesn't have $$$)
He just pays my son's health insurance which is almost $200/month and that's all; I even take my son to the Dr and Dentist...

Is not that he doesn't have money, he works some( he says he doesn't like 8-5 O'clock jobs!!!! he is lazy and selfish; he does as he calls it "Volunteer work in his church because it makes him feel good" ( he rather not to make $$$ and take care of his son and... ) he knows what kind a mother I am and no matter what he does, I do my best to take care of our son's Financially and Emotionally so he doesn't bother to do what he suppose to do...and take advantage of our situation.
He cries front of my son and others, act as a victim that every body should feel bad for him and he calls himself very caring and a wonderful father!!!!!!!!!

I can go on and on about how mean and selfish my Ex has been and how he has been taking advantage of the situation and the System and what a bad influence he has been in my son's life... But I need help, I can not take the abuse any more, I want to go one with our lives and have a healthy and happy family.
I have an attorney but I need a better one, someone that can defend me very well in the court And can get me the Full Custody; I need a Great attorney, perhaps someone that works with A Private Investigator to be able to show truly what kind a man/father my Ex has been and how Great it will be for my son's well being when his mother has his Full Custody.

Bottom line I want 100% full Custody of my Son and just give some visitation right to my Ex.
I need a Great, Smart Attorney.
Please help

Last edited by FMD; 01-09-2008 at 10:56 AM..
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Old 01-09-2008, 10:27 AM
 
Location: Wake Forest
932 posts, read 1,152,211 times
Reputation: 326
I'm sorry to hear you're having problems, and can't help with an attorney.

When you did your formatting for your post you were trying to change font sizes and things, but it didn't work - your post will be much easier for others ( who may know good attorneys) to read and follow if you edit your post and take out all the formatting. Make sure you use paragraphs too, it helps when reading something long and complicated!

Good luck to you!
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Old 01-09-2008, 10:51 AM
FMD FMD started this thread
 
15 posts, read 61,489 times
Reputation: 24
Thanks, I fixed it
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Old 01-09-2008, 10:56 AM
 
551 posts, read 1,803,528 times
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Your post is very hard to read. I can tell that you are very upset, though. Obviously I do not know everything that has happened in your life, but your situation sounds very complicated. As I understand your post, both you and your ex-husband are being supported by other people to whom you are not married. As an attorney, I can tell you that there are lawyers who will probably represent a client for any cause, but I am not your attorney. As a mother and a grandmother, I advise you and your ex-husband to get counseling to try to find a way you can both continue to be good parents to your son. I understand you do not think your ex is a good father, but he is the only father your son will ever have. Please try to get counseling and try to resolve your issues before getting lawyers and courts involved.
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Old 01-09-2008, 11:18 AM
FMD FMD started this thread
 
15 posts, read 61,489 times
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Thank you for your advice. We were communicating before and it seemed ok but as soon as I got engaged and he realized that I don't work any more and wanted to spend more time with my son and I except him to support his son financially he became very dishonest and with no discussion about it he got the lawyer and tried to make it hard for us. He though he can take an advantage of the system by making up lies... but didn't go through and now in this situation he is taking a ride and tries to make our life hard; my Ex started the lawyers and I understood the best way to communicate with him then it has to be by law. There is nothing more important for me than my Son's well being that's why I need to have his full custody.

Last edited by FMD; 01-09-2008 at 11:43 AM..
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Old 01-09-2008, 01:46 PM
 
379 posts, read 584,788 times
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DM'ed u some info. hope it helps
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Old 01-09-2008, 02:17 PM
FMD FMD started this thread
 
15 posts, read 61,489 times
Reputation: 24
Thanks, I know already two that I heard they are very good.
I will make Apt. for consultatin.
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Old 01-09-2008, 03:19 PM
 
Location: beautiful North Carolina
7,573 posts, read 10,272,582 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sundaze View Post
Your post is very hard to read. I can tell that you are very upset, though. Obviously I do not know everything that has happened in your life, but your situation sounds very complicated. As I understand your post, both you and your ex-husband are being supported by other people to whom you are not married. As an attorney, I can tell you that there are lawyers who will probably represent a client for any cause, but I am not your attorney. As a mother and a grandmother, I advise you and your ex-husband to get counseling to try to find a way you can both continue to be good parents to your son. I understand you do not think your ex is a good father, but he is the only father your son will ever have. Please try to get counseling and try to resolve your issues before getting lawyers and courts involved.
I have to agree. I can tell you first hand how difficult this can be because I've experienced it. I divorced my husband when my children were 3 and 4. I too felt that they should be with me with full custody because of many problems over the years and much abuse from my ex-husband. If you really want problems, try divorcing a policeman. Anyway, the boys remained with me, I had joint custody with primary residence. Their father remarried a Lebanese women who was, to say the least, not a very nice person, and of course made the situation much worse. They had their own child, and their father had little to no time for our boys. I never dragged them into the middle of anything, didn't talk bad about him, although he deserved it, I ended up remarrying when they were 8 and 9, had 2 more children, and my husband now, helped with their upbringing. Their father and present wife did everything in their power to make me look like an unfit Mom, verbally bash me and my husband to my boys, and now that they are 20 and 21, have no relationship with their step-mom, probably because of all the damage that was done over the years. Their father, on the other hand, they are now just beginning to establish a relationship and salvage what they can from all the lost time that they missed with him. What I'm trying to say basically is, if you try and keep your child from their father or talk badly of him in front of your son, your son will blame you for it down the road. Believe me, what goes around, comes around, and your ex will get his, as my ex-husband has. Personally, I think my ex is miserable with his present wife, coming from my kids actually. Every child needs a relationship with both parents and I advise you to let some form of a relationship exist. Good luck. Jeannie
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Old 01-09-2008, 04:54 PM
FMD FMD started this thread
 
15 posts, read 61,489 times
Reputation: 24
I have no problem for my son to have relationship with his father but I want to be my son's primary residence and his father have some visitation; not 50/50
I don't talk bad about my Ex front of my son, my Ex is the one that act as a victim and always trying to explain to my son that he is right and I am wrong and he is the one that want to do the best for our son but not Mommy...
I do believe that what goes around comes around too but I don't want my son to be brain wash too much, he is too young. I am just hoping my son will know the truth one day, hopefully sooner than later.
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