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In a big city, you don't feel the effects of this so much. But in a suburban sprawl like the Triangle, you're suddenly very conscious of your singleness.
You're gonna have to move to a top 5 metropolis... because if you feel it here, you'll feel it in Charlotte, too.
... and the fact that you're on here... on Raleigh-Durham's city-data forum posting about this matter is quite telling.
Last edited by UserNamesake; 01-19-2016 at 06:12 AM..
Raleigh can be okay for single childless people, but there are certainly better places. Raleigh is just a very family area. The whole city feels like one big residential area. As a single male, in family friendly areas, it's very hard to find someone who is in their 20s without a child.
Places like Minneapolis, Austin, Atlanta, Washington DC are much better for single professionals. College towns too, but often the job market is limited.
Another thing I miss is the lack of an interesting food scene - I miss being able to get amazing food, from sushi to ramen to Vietnamese to neat vegetarian places to upscale restaurants with cutting edge chefs. Living in a big vibrant city means access to delicious food. It's just part of life, and part of why living in those cities is so pricey. I hadn't realized how hooked I was on the big city food scene, until I encountered the mediocre chain restaurants that are such a part of life in suburban sprawl.
There was one evening I met up with my friend, I hadn't eaten all day, so I was starving, and we were meeting people at a restaurant for dinner. I asked her, "Where are we going?" She said, "Wings N Rings."
OK, but ALL of that is here. This is a problem with your friend not being into that sort of thing, but there are Beard award-winning chefs all over the triangle and pretty much every sort of ethnic cuisine is available. Just takes some driving as opposed to walking. Cary's Chatham Square has restaurants from numerous countries; none are chains - Durham is known nationally as a foodie town - Raleigh has vegetarian at Fiction Kitchen - it's all out there.
Check out the Ethnic Food meetup's past meetups for some ideas (though I think some were mediocre) and also do look at yelp.
We have authentic Chinese all over the place, authentic Mexican all over the place - I actually moved back here from Wilmington partially because of the food scene!
It would be a shame for you to leave partially because you have friends who don't share your interests and you haven't been exposed to things you like that actually are here.
What NorasMom said. Plenty of fantastic nationally noted restaurants here. If you're not eating in them you're missing out.
This area won't ever be anything like Boston, but I think it has a lot of good stuff going for it. I am not a big city person, though, so YMMV. It does sound like you haven't found the right parts of the Triangle, though. I'd spend a little more time here. Someone on your other thread suggested staying through the spring and I think that sounds good. No need to move back to Boston in the middle of winter. And take that time to look for the things that you like here. Maybe start a new thread about restaurants if that's a big thing for you and get some recommendations on that or whatever else you like to do and then if after spending a warmer winter in NC (and hopefully seeing a little bit of the beautiful spring) and seeking out the Triangle versions of your kind of things to do, if you still find the area lacking then go back to Boston or strike out for somewhere new.
So you like restaurants? Have you been to Lantern in Chapel Hill?
FWIW, although there are plenty of families and marrieds all over the Triangle I think that Durham and Chapel Hill might be better for singles than Raleigh, unless you can hook into the older singles scene in Raleigh. I know some over there and some childless couples, but it's a super family-friendly area. Maybe check out Durham or Chapel Hill/Carrboro before you make up your mind.
BTW, I know lots of people who have relocated from San Francisco to here and love it.
I had kid-less friends in their late 30's move away from the triangle b/c they felt it was too family centric: co-workers babbled on about their kids, all their friends were too busy entertaining their kids, etc. So they left their good RTP jobs, packed up and moved to San Francisco- a few years later they had a baby. I think the draw to the triangle is b/c it is affordable for a one parent to stay at home.
...they felt it was too family centric: co-workers babbled on about their kids, all their friends were too busy entertaining their kids, etc...
Depending on your work culture, you'll get folks babbling on ridiculously about their kids nearly anywhere in America.
I'm one of only two childless employees at my current job, and no one babbles endlessly about their children. However, in a previous job, I worked around younger moms not too far removed from college, and they talked incessantly (and nauseatingly at times) about their kids. Actually that was the only job I've had in the Triangle where the kid babble meter was that high (granted it was outside of Raleigh-Durham-Chapel Hill)
We gotta stop attributing personal characteristics, the culture individuals create, and the usual life stage developments of people's (obviously aging) social pool to an entire MSA.
Another thing I miss is the lack of an interesting food scene - I miss being able to get amazing food, from sushi to ramen to Vietnamese to neat vegetarian places to upscale restaurants with cutting edge chefs. Living in a big vibrant city means access to delicious food. It's just part of life, and part of why living in those cities is so pricey. I hadn't realized how hooked I was on the big city food scene, until I encountered the mediocre chain restaurants that are such a part of life in suburban sprawl.
There was one evening I met up with my friend, I hadn't eaten all day, so I was starving, and we were meeting people at a restaurant for dinner. I asked her, "Where are we going?" She said, "Wings N Rings."
Plenty of good food here, plenty of non chains, the foods you are looking for are definitely here, I think because of the situation of being on a solo mission you haven't had a chance to explore the area, granted you have only been here for couple of months. I don't know how much longer you will be here but you have to at least make the best out of it and explore a little.
I rarely eat at chain restaurants. I also live in downtown Durham area which barely even has any chain restaurants, and there is lots of stuff within walking distance to me.
Did you try to live in a more urban part of the Triangle or are you living out in suburbia?
There are some urban areas (downtown Durham, 9th street) and Cameron Village/downtown Raleigh.
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