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Yet another relocation question. Sorry in advance for the overlap in topics, but I've read through pages of threads and would love to hear local's thoughts on specific places.
A little about us: My husband and I are in our 30s with two boys, age 3y and 6mo. We will be relocating from Los Angeles, with no real tie to any particular area since he will be working from home and I will look for jobs after we move. We are looking for a place that has a nice community, family-friendly feel, with a diverse population and good schools. We are heavily considering Chapel Hill and Cary. We would like to purchase a house (up to $800k for our dream house), something like 3000-4000 sq ft, 4 beds + office, a yard, massive kitchen (). Don't want a ton of land, but a little space between houses would be great; community pool would be a bonus for our little guys, not too close to airport noise.
So, my questions: which specific communities and/or builders would you consider? The house does not have to be brand new (up to 15yo is probably fine) but I've thought a bit about custom homes and don't know if that process/ timeframe would be doable from across the country.
I know this isn't helpful, but there's a gazillion neighborhoods that fit your bill. You're requirements aren't overly demanding so you're in good shape. Keep in mind that just because you work from home now, doesn't mean you always will.
My ideal neighborhood? If we didn't have kids we'd be in Lochmere in Cary, probably the lakeside section. I love that area so much. But alas, we fell into the schools hype and ended up in west cary. No regrets and I love my neighborhood, but it's not my ideal Triangle neighborhood.
I know this isn't helpful, but there's a gazillion neighborhoods that fit your bill. You're requirements aren't overly demanding so you're in good shape.
My ideal neighborhood? If we didn't have kids we'd be in Lochmere in Cary, probably the lakeside section. I love that area so much. But alas, we fell into the schools hype and ended up in west cary. No regrets and I love my neighborhood, but it's not my ideal Triangle neighborhood.
My dad lives in Lochmere (Highlands not Lakeside)....yes that is a beautiful area. He's lived there for 20 years despite the fact that most of his work is around hwy 98!
School hype is a thing though and you're right....not a whole lot of families with kids in that area any more...mostly empty nesters/retirees. You can walk to Oak Grove elementary from Lochmere Highlands which is pretty cool; but still.....it 's not Davis Drive so no hype.....
Homes there are also older than OP is looking for...mostly 20-30 years old.
I like where I live (what I call Olde West Cary, which is east of highway 55)...I also like the area around downtown Cary (on the south side of downtown) and I like the area south of US64 in Apex. None of these would probably be considered by someone with $800K to spend on a house but I just get a good feeling in those areas. I don't care for the area around Kildaire Farm and Tryon Roads at all, by comparison. Beautiful homes in the area, just don't like the feeling I get over there at all.
That's the thing with relocating here, especially from clear across the country....hard to get here a lot to know where you will like, but I will say there are very few areas I WOULDN'T live and I know so many people who have moved from where they originally bought a house...even if only a few miles away. Moving here seems to be easier than it is in a lot of other places.
Thanks for these responses. All good things to think about. Yes, I do want to be somewhat "central" because I will eventually look for a job in the healthcare field. We won't necessarily spend at the top of our budget, but we'd be willing to if our dream house came up in a nice location. I am definitely trying to get a grasp of the school hype, but it seems like many West Cary schools are good according to greatschools (not sure how accurate this really is).
Thanks for these responses. All good things to think about. Yes, I do want to be somewhat "central" because I will eventually look for a job in the healthcare field. We won't necessarily spend at the top of our budget, but we'd be willing to if our dream house came up in a nice location. I am definitely trying to get a grasp of the school hype, but it seems like many West Cary schools are good according to greatschools (not sure how accurate this really is).
Most of the schools in Wake County are good. Unlike some other places in the U.S. where the more you spend for a house, the better the schools, that is not necessarily true here. You can spend under $300K and get into some really good schools and you can spend a million and get what aren't considered the tops.
I would find a good realty site and plug in all your requirements. Bump them up some (i.e. at $700-800K go for 4000sf, 3 car garage, 5 bedrooms etc). Look at the houses to get a feel for which neighborhoods are appealing to you, and go from there.
If I was dropping $800K for a house, I'd go for something inside-the-beltline of Raleigh. Location, location, location.
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). Don't want a ton of land, but a little space between houses would be great; community pool would be a bonus for our little guys, not too close to airport noise. 
