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I think the beige stereotype stems mostly from the many large neighborhoods that were built with beige and other neutral colors and then had HOA restrictions where you had to get approval for any color change. There's even a large thread with photos on the many, many non-beige homes in the town. The sign restrictions were a separate thing.
It's certainly not a big city like Seattle. Maybe there are some city activities in Seattle that you're missing too that you're leaving out of your description?
Are you missing some city stuff about Seattle, too?
Can you go on and on? It might help us point you in the direction of some stuff you might like here. Obviously we've got no rocky Pacific coast, but we do have a lot of outdoor activities in North Carolina and in the Triangle specifically. What outdoor activities did you like to do in Seattle in particular? What do you mean by "seasonal activities"? Of course we have mountains 3 hrs to the west so not as close as Seattle's nor as big, but plenty close for a weekend trip (we're headed out to Boone tomorrow as a matter of fact). We are not right on the water like Seattle, that's certainly true, but not as landlocked as Kansas or somewhere! What did you like about the "overall culture"? When I think of Seattle I think of a progressive liberal city, but not sure that's what you're after if you're in Cary.
I love the blue skies of spring summer and fall here, but if the heat gets to you Seattle might be the right choice.
The heat probably plays the biggest role. I truly can't tolerate it and it makes or breaks outdoor activities for me. Having grown up in Florida I know I wont get used to it. So 6 months out of the year I feel like a rat in a cage. My work also entails activities outdoors. I think that's why things felt better 10 months in, the cooler weather came. Western Washington averages 40-50 degrees much of the year. Very rare extreme cold or heat. You asked for examples so here are some with pics for reference:
Camping at mount Rainier, visits to Leavenworth (German town) for sledding / Christmas festivities, Spring Skagit Valley Tulip Festival (we did wind up loving the sunflower fields in summer here), hiking at Lake Diablo, pumpkin picking at a real patch (we have indeed found small ones here), 4th of July fireworks at Gasworks park overlooking skyline, snowflake lane around Christmas (similar to Macy's Thanksgiving parade), ferry ride day trip / weekend trip to Victoria BC or the San Juan islands, plentiful kids parks (just a much greater amount) and indoor play spaces, canoeing on Lake Washington, sunsets on the lake / at the marina.
I know these are stock photos but I have so many with my family in them that look very similar.
I'm not a fan of the beige as you call it, or the communities that as you noted lack character. Living in Cary I'm not a fan of West Cary, but I do like the older areas near downtown.
We've enjoyed a few trips to the Downtown Cary fountain and a holiday event in downtown. We did the fair. Loved the sunflower fields in Raleigh but left quickly due to humidity / heat. I was excited to see Bond Park has a boathouse, but the season its open is when the heat picks up. We went to Duke Gardens (very pretty). Wonderful fall trip to Myrtle Beach, camping in Boone / Tweetsie railroad, roadtrip to the Cherokee National Forest, Blue Ridge parkway, a waterfall (I forget the name). So we HAVE found fun things to do mostly in the cooler months, just not many very close.
Last edited by Shadesofkray; 03-29-2018 at 10:15 AM..
Reason: Sentence edit
OP, maybe you need to get a job someplace other than Holly Springs?
Just a thought. You say you prefer DT Cary, so it's obviously not that you dislike where you live. What is it you are seeing? I am guessing it happens during your commute. So, is there a way to fix that?
I dislike driving down Hwy 55, for example. (Note: I am from here originally)
I really, really dislike 55. It's depressing and dreary and about the ugliest road in the Triangle to me.
So, yeah... maybe find a new route to work? If you cannot avoid blah stuff going there, find another place to work that is nearer to something more scenic and/or visually appealing?
I think there are some things you could do here to see if they help before you pick up and move across the country again. There is always the possibility that you'll move there and wind up missing some things about here and be even more confused.
Have you ever been hiking in Umstead?
Ugg, I HATE 55. The commute does add to the drearyness. I did perk up when the cherry blossoms and bradford pear trees bloomed though!
I do value that my commute is short since I go opposite traffic- 15-20 minutes in the morning, 25-30 evening. I had appointments before driving West Cary to Chapel Hill and that was a nicer drive.
I've considered giving Chapel Hill more of a chance. I have really liked it second best to Cary. We had lunch in downtown Carborro recently and it was like I was transported to another state. So very different.
I'm tempted to give it another year, but summers are the only time we can move (job contract), and we have a financial incentive to doing it this summer (year and a half here).
The Bond Park boathouse is open reasonably from April to October given the typical weather, but I think that is besides the point.
It seems to all come down to the summer weather which you have decided that you don't like. The average summer temps aren't going to change. There is an endless list of things to do, places to go, things to see, but if your mind is already made up... no one here is going to change that or the weather.
I notice a number of your pictures contain mountains. Like the weather, those are not going to magically sprout from the ground on the east coast (barring a serious natural disaster). I could sit an stare a mountain for days and be hypnotized and happy but go about my day without them being a part of it just fine.
It is ok to prefer to live somewhere else and you will only make yourself miserable with a 'grass is greener' mentality.
I will also say, that I think that in general, we are as happy as we make our minds up to be. That is, of course, my opinion. I'm happy living in a Raleigh suburb, I was happy living in rural Minnesota, and happy living in urban Minneapolis, and happy living in the Chicago burbs, and could be happy in those places magain, or a studio apartment in NYC if I had to.
One other thing, and no one has mentioned it, so I'm going to.
Is it possible that you miss the life and lifestyle you had pre-children?
Friends, activities, hobbies...
An adult kickball league in Seattle isn't going to be notably more fun than a kickball league in Raleigh. Your Crossfit gym in Seattle that had a cool group of people to work out with, is only something you'll recapture if you continue to have time to enjoy that and live right there in the neighborhood and can access it between work and parenting.
Friendships you make will be different too...You're now, to a certain extent, always going to be "Aiden's Mom," and here, as opposed to elsewhere, there is no one that knew you pre-parenthood. And, you're older, so the friendships are likely to be different regardless, than the friendships you create when you're in your early twenties.
Will you be able to enjoy Seattle as you did when you were younger and your kid was younger? Will a condo be a hassle for y'all? What if you want another child, or one just happens?
I love that mindset
I think the parent aspect is a solid consideration. However, we lived in WA 6 1/2 years and 4 of those were with our son. We've taken him on family adventures from a young age. He's a little explorer. So much of what I miss doing I miss doing with my husband and son.
If we had another by accident NC would be a solid bet I think. Not in pur plans at least.
I was excited about a house, even a modest one (we rent) but it didn't wind up feeling worth it.
I think I see families here content with a simple lifestyle, and I'm not bashing that - I get it. Safe, quiet neighborhood, good school, soccer practice, church, weekend barbeque, good work / life balance. I'm this slightly eccentric, gypsy personality who itches for adventure and I feel like I haven't found my place here.
The Bond Park boathouse is open reasonably from April to October given the typical weather, but I think that is besides the point.
It seems to all come down to the summer weather which you have decided that you don't like. The average summer temps aren't going to change. There is an endless list of things to do, places to go, things to see, but if your mind is already made up... no one here is going to change that or the weather.
I notice a number of your pictures contain mountains. Like the weather, those are not going to magically sprout from the ground on the east coast (barring a serious natural disaster). I could sit an stare a mountain for days and be hypnotized and happy but go about my day without them being a part of it just fine.
It is ok to prefer to live somewhere else and you will only make yourself miserable with a 'grass is greener' mentality.
And having grown up in Florida, no one can say she doesn't have familiarity with different locations in the country. She said Seattle clicked. However just as the summer won't magically cool off and mountains won't magically grow here, the COL in the PacNW is not going to decrease. So the decision comes down to live somewhere with a better cost of living but less QOL, or better QOL and it's going to affect the bottom line for the rest of your life. It's that simple - which is more important.
EVERYTHING in life is a compromise.
Given your desire for a more temperate and less hot/humid climate, I'd say leave the southeast US altogether. Go back west, to the coast or at least within striking distance of a couple hours to get to the coast. You love the PNW weather. Go and be happy. There's no point living in a place you don't like, with weather you despise 6 months of the year just for the sake of being able to afford a house. That's no life either.
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