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Melanie- I remember when you were first posting about moving down here, and I'm sorry it hasn't been all that you hoped. I think you've done a really great thing by posting here. I hope you will continue to make a concerted effort to make things work. Moving anywhere on earth requires that effort - especially for someone like me, who doesn't exactly make a ton of friends on day 1!
Knowing that finances weigh heavily on your mind, I would encourage you to find free or cheap things that you can particpate in and make a connection to others. If you are religious, join a church/other religious community and check our their social program (Sept is a great time of year for those things starting up).
Check out the community center's activities:
Town of Carrboro, NC :: 919-942-8541 (http://www.ci.carrboro.nc.us/RP/gptripsSum08.htm - broken link)
Town of Chapel Hill Official Website - Recreation (http://www.ci.chapel-hill.nc.us/index.asp?nid=115 - broken link)
Try the jaycees or other community service groups as a way to meet like-minded people. Organize a meetup of people who replied here!
As for it feeling quiet, Chapel Hill and Carrboro will get a LOT more crowded in about a week!! Not NYC crowded, but a big influx of students & faculty as the semester starts!
I have even thought about volunteering somewhere until I get a full time job. I am even jealous of my daughter who will be starting back to school soon...lol.
Thank you all for the helpful tips and suggestions. It's also nice knowing we're not alone!!
I almost didn't want to post this thread, because I always read how everyone (or almost everyone ) absolutely loves it down here and has no second thoughts or regrets about moving to the area.
I agree with giving it some time and waiting for things to fall in to place.
We relocated from MA last November. Initially I was less than thrilled with the area and was quite homesick (I didnt grow up in MA, but it was my home for 8 yrs). We (Dh ) were a corporate location, financially we were fine, housing was my issue. It was really hard living in a furnished corporate apartment with 2 toddlers and a dog. The housing market was slim pickens in Nov/Dec, househunting was so stressful.
Everything fell into place when we closed/moved into our new house in January. Now I absolutely LOVE it here! Hope you can say the same in a few months.
Congrats on being cancer free. Hope it stays that way My mother has been in remission from leukemia for 15 yrs now.
ETA - The only negative for me is the fact that we are yet to make any friends. My poor children are so bored, hopefully that will change when my oldest starts preschool in September (I couldnt find a spot mid year, so Ive had both my 4 and 2 year old home with me all day/all week).
I have a client from Boston that has found several groups in the area to join. He found them on meetup.com. I know it SOUNDS like a type of hookup group but he says they are legitimate! For example, he joined a group of folks that like watching some Boston team play. They meet when this team plays and have drinks and appetizers at one of the local sports bars. There are many groups for singles and couples. Any type of activity seems to be included...for example, if you play bridge and want to meet with other people that play bridge, join up. There are plenty of people out there that want to meet others with similar tastes and have no way to go about it. If you don't meet people at your job, kids' school, church, where else? I say, try it!
Just wanted to know if any relocators are unhappy they moved here and why. My husband and I moved here at the end of May and we live in Carrboro. We came down for the usual "quality of life" reasons and with the hopes that my husband can find work.
A little background for us: We're from NYC and my husband had nothing but dead end jobs there. He wasn't close to his family but I'm super close to my 2 brothers. We both had health issues...I'm a cancer survivor and November will be 2 years cancer-free, God willing. We heard you have to live here first before any employers would even consider us which is why we came down without jobs. I know from reading the forum that there are posters who agree/disagree. I'm an executive assistant so the chances of me being relocated were slim to none. I'm presently temping at UNC and got this gig pretty quickly.
To make a long story short, I'm completely unhappy for several reasons. I miss my brothers and what originally seemed like "oh, we're not that far..we'll visit lots of times" now feels like NY is at the opposite ends of the earth. We're struggling financially (we were struggling in NY too so nothing's changed), and my husband needs to find a job. Whereas my brothers first told us we needed a change and this might be good for us, has now turned to them telling us we're going to be in big trouble and what were we thinking.
Maybe once my husband finds work and my job becomes permanent, I'll relax a little and things will pick up. But right now I can't even enjoy the beauty of the area. I just feel very alone and like I don't belong here. If I could, I would pack my things and go back to NY tomorrow.
Does anyone else have regrets about moving here?
I'm here 4 years, I'm not thrilled, it does not feel like home. My husband likes it here, but it does not feel like home to him either. We both agree, it's a new residence, not "home."
However I do feel that you should wait to make a call on whether you're truly unhappy after the stress of not having a permanent job stops clouding your ability to judge how you feel about other parts of living here.
PS. As for family members...take all their advice with a grain of salt (and a large shot of tequila, with lime please). You know what's good and right for you. No one else.
My mother-in-law just recently started talking to my husband again after a couple of years of the silent treatment as punishment for moving here. [punishment? i love silence] My aunt calls daily and tells my mother, who followed me down here, "just leave!" NC. Their motives are self-serving and that's all. Dontcha wish they had the "ignore" button for family sometimes like on your cell phone??
PS. As for family members...take all their advice with a grain of salt (and a large shot of tequila, with lime please). You know what's good and right for you. No one else.
My mother-in-law just recently started talking to my husband again after a couple of years of the silent treatment as punishment for moving here. [punishment? i love silence] My aunt calls daily and tells my mother, who followed me down here, "just leave!" NC. Their motives are self-serving and that's all. Dontcha wish they had the "ignore" button for family sometimes like on your cell phone??
I want a DELETE button for MY FAMILY that left Florida about 8 years ago and moved back to NC! Too much drama from mom and sister for me!
I underestimated how much I was going to miss my family and friends in CA. I found that I really needed to make more effort to meet people and I did. Fortunately I bike and play tennis so those are great ways to meet people. It takes time so I'm giving myself that. My husband is very happy here and I'm doing my best not to complain but make an effort. I'm sure next year I'll feel even better about the move.
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I just moved here from Detroit and my husband and I don't know a soul.
Hmm.
