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I don't know anything about Durham, only been here a year. But how can you blame the realtor(s) for their advice? Think about it, everyone admits that there are pockets of high crime areas in Durham... while there isn't any mention of high crime in Cary, and we all know to stay away from SE Raleigh. Pockets of crime can be anywhere in the city apparently... As someone who doesn't know the area, I would welcome this advice as well--at least they're not giving you false hope or guiding you into a bad decision. It's understandable that Durham residents would get angry over something like this, but you shouldn't place the blame on "ignorance" as Durham's reputation precedes itself.
I don't know anything about Durham, only been here a year. But how can you blame the realtor(s) for their advice? Think about it, everyone admits that there are pockets of high crime areas in Durham... while there isn't any mention of high crime in Cary, and we all know to stay away from SE Raleigh. Pockets of crime can be anywhere in the city apparently... As someone who doesn't know the area, I would welcome this advice as well--at least they're not giving you false hope or guiding you into a bad decision. It's understandable that Durham residents would get angry over something like this, but you shouldn't place the blame on "ignorance" as Durham's reputation precedes itself.
How does someone from say, themiddleofnowhere USA, know to stay away from SE Raleigh???
I didn't know that when I moved to NC.... I explored and experienced what ALL the areas had to offer, and made the decision that was best for me...which was Durham! I don't get angry about the ignorance, but when people argue that it is a horrible place to live, that DOES make me angry... and it takes a lot to make me angry! I am about the most mellow, peaceful person one could meet, but it does bug me when people make blanket statements... I hope to be a force in changing Durham's reputation, and invite people to check it out for themselves. It isn't for everyone (but neither is Cary or Chapel Hill or Raleigh or.....), but to have people imply that it isn't for anyone, is what makes me crazy! Live a little... if you don't love it like I do, then great, you belong somewhere else! That is what makes us all different and special!
How does someone from say, themiddleofnowhere USA, know to stay away from SE Raleigh???
I didn't know that when I moved to NC.... I explored and experienced what ALL the areas had to offer, and made the decision that was best for me...which was Durham! I don't get angry about the ignorance, but when people argue that it is a horrible place to live, that DOES make me angry... and it takes a lot to make me angry! I am about the most mellow, peaceful person one could meet, but it does bug me when people make blanket statements... I hope to be a force in changing Durham's reputation, and invite people to check it out for themselves. It isn't for everyone (but neither is Cary or Chapel Hill or Raleigh or.....), but to have people imply that it isn't for anyone, is what makes me crazy! Live a little... if you don't love it like I do, then great, you belong somewhere else! That is what makes us all different and special!
If someone says Durham is a horrible place to live, it doesn't make them wrong. It may well be horrible for them, as Cary may be horrible for others. What a person likes or dislikes in a town/city is a personal choice and you cannot condemn someone for their feelings on the subject. Now if they said Durham is 100% gang infested and you will get killed there, that would be something different because it would be factually incorrect, just like saying Cary is all beige. It just seems like when people point out the obvious, it offends people. The crime stats do not lie. The OP asked if Durham is less safe than Cary. There is no debating the answer. However, it seems that just about everyone, including me, always makes sure people understand that the overall crime numbers a skewed because of isolated pockets of high crime. We lived in SW Durham first and it was a great experience. I think it is a great place to live to learn the area from. The daily dose of crime reports about Durham on the news did start to weigh on us and was one part of many reasons we decided to move. That does not mean Durham is horrible and I really don't see many people saying that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by coltank
See, lots of different opinions, and very strong ones from the people trying to "sell" where they live. People tend to think their area is the best. CD's posts are a perfect example. Now that he has moved out of Cary and is looking for a home for his son in Holly Springs, that is now one of the greatest cities ever.
Here are some flaws in your argument:
I don't live in Holly Springs
The house purchased for our son is in Clayton, not Holly Springs
Even though I do not live in Cary, I continue to state it is the single best town overall in the southeast
However, even though you got 100% of the facts incorrect, most likely from assuming, I do think you have a valid point. Some people tend to downplay the issues their town has, like it is a blemish on them if the town has issues. I have clearly stated over and over that I was uncomfortable with the elevating crime reports in Cary, did not care for the downtown of Cary and think that the Crossroads layout in Cary was designed by someone sniffing glue. Those issues exist and trying to hide them is ridiculous. The best advice the OP can get for a thread like this would be from someone like myself that actually HAS lived in both the city of Durham and in Cary. I know what both places are like having lived there. Both have pros and both have cons. As a fellow New Englander, I think the OP would be well served by my thoughts about both places.
Last edited by Charlton Dude; 06-15-2009 at 03:57 PM..
It's understandable that Durham residents would get angry over something like this, but you shouldn't place the blame on "ignorance" as Durham's reputation precedes itself.
But it IS ignorance when people make a blanket statement about Durham being unsafe, stay way from there, bad schools... MOST of Durham is perfectly safe and great for families, with great schools! That would be like saying "Oh, stay away from Raleigh" instead of "Oh, stay away from SE Raleigh"
Are those of you that are still going on a bad reputation getting it now?
I invite all of you who find or hear Durham to be dangerous, scary, gross, and dirty, to check it out for yourselves! Check out the Woodcroft/Southpoint areas for a newer suburban feel. Move a bit further and you have Hope Valley and the South Square area that is more established and convenient to everything. Then you have Forest Hills that is a great older neighborhood on the outskirts of downtown. Further north you have a great downtown with a lot of revitalization and a lot to offer. The neighboring historic homes are beautiful and I wish I could afford to live there! Some of these areas downtown do have pockets of crime, and obviously most of it is on the eastern side. AGAIN, no reason to be in that area. West of downtown you have Duke. Nearby is Watts-Hillandale and 9th St., a charming older neighborhood and shops. Go further north and you have the beginning of Northern Durham that is still convenient to downtown and starts to get very affordable. Even further north up Guess Rd., where I grew up there are neighborhoods spread out with old and new developement, where there are lots of trees and larger lots. It gets more rural the further north you go with lots of trees, farm land, a few neighborhoods, and peace and quiet! Just north of Duke and throughout North Durham you will find several locations to hike, fish, and camp at the Eno.
Durham is a large area and to label it as a dangerous place as a whole is just wrong. Not just opinion, but fact!. I dare those of you who really don't know what you're talking about to check it out.
By the way, my boyfriend grew up in Cary and always heard the scary "don't go to Durham you'll get shot, wear a bullet proof vest" rumours. Well he lived there the last five years and knows better. He finds it funny now...
So, yes it is simply ignorant to believe otherwise.
http://64.15.203.20/dictionary/ignorant
Main Entry: ig·no·rant
Pronunciation: 'ig-n(&-)r&nt
Function: adjective
1 a : destitute of knowledge or education <an ignorant society>; also : lacking knowledge or comprehension of the thing specified <parents ignorant of modern mathematics> b : resulting from or showing lack of knowledge or intelligence <ignorant errors>
As several have already stated here, crime stats don't lie. Just watch the news. Almost every headlining story about a murder, shooting, robbery, etc. takes place in Durham. Fact is, different people will like or dislike certain things about an area. You won't please anyone. So anybody considering moving to Durham, or anywhere else for that matter, should do their homework. Read the statistics, visit the area, then decide on your own if it meets your individual needs.
CARY Realtors tell you to stay away from another city? Why would YOU think they'd want to limit your choices from other cities? I wonder if someone at Circuit City [when they were still around] would ever tell someone to "stay away" from Best Buy...
The answer is, the worst parts of Durham probably are worst than the worst parts of other areas. However, Durham has undergone amazing renovations as a city in the past few years, and its "bad reputation" is at least a decade out of date, if it ever really was true in the first place.
The realtors who said that also deal in Durham real estate, so that's why I was puzzled...
I want to THANK everyone who has responded in such generous detail to my query. I will look closely at the Durham area. I have friends who work at Duke and live in that city, they seem to like it. I may have more specific questions when I get back!!
The realtors who said that also deal in Durham real estate, so that's why I was puzzled...
I want to THANK everyone who has responded in such generous detail to my query. I will look closely at the Durham area. I have friends who work at Duke and live in that city, they seem to like it. I may have more specific questions when I get back!!
Many of us who live in Durham are absolutely passionate about it. I like Raleigh well enough, and there are areas there I really like -- but of everywhere I've lived in the US, there's nowhere I've felt as home at, and as passionate about, as the Bull City.
....While Durham has nice suburban areas, particularly at the northern and southern edges, much of Durham's character and energy comes from the urban areas, Duke/NCCU, downtown, Ninth St. and so forth. If you're the kind of New Englander who'd rather have a triple-decker walk-up in Arlington, or a funky loft in Lowell, or an in-town house in Hartford or Providence than be in a suburban, chain-store place like Franklin MA or the furthest North Shore, I think you might like Durham's core.
If suburbs appeal to you for their newer housing stock and proximity to mass-market shopping, one might be happier (IMO) in suburban areas of Durham or in Wake Co./Cary.
Good luck!
Thanks Bull City. As soon as someone tells me to stay away from something I'm sure to be attracted (probably b/c I'm an artist and open to other ways of seeing things). I guess I asked about Durham b/c I really want to be near my son in Cary... I see so many nice things about Cary, but quite honestly, I didn't grow up in a suburb in NewEngl, and when in college lived in Back Bay and old neighborhoods, and am most comfortable in older surroundings (the one I grew up and am attracted to still was a jumble of single houses, double deckers, triple...on tree lined streets and bus lines with deli's and ethnic stores and small markets and easy access to libraries, etc. In my older years I'm not at all sure I want to be in a suburban area, as it's so spread out, so much driving, and sometimes can have such a homogenous look to the neighborhoods. In one suburb I lived in once in the midwest I would always get lost looking for my own house! But one problem about the quirky older houses is energy efficiency. Here in NE they leak like a sieve and eat up heat and electricity like crazy. Even with wood heat the $$$ go up in smoke.
So, while I'm at it...how cold, generally does it get in this part of NC?
I'm coming in early July to see just how HOT it gets...you guys must be pretty gutsy to be able to thrive in the heat & humidity . Besides air conditioning, which I've never had, what tips do you have for not suffocating on hot summer nights?
This post sums it up pretty well. Durham county will offer you a wide range of options. There is something for everyone. SW Durham is more like Cary. It contains the most quality character anywhere in Durham and as the OP is a fellow New Englander, she would most likely find SW Durham or Cary the most pleasing. SW Durham & Cary are where the best architecture will be found, the most beautiful trails and landscaping, the best shopping, great restaurants, the best access to RTP. These two areas have it all over anywhere else.
I've read a lot of your posts and think you'd be TERRIFIC working for the Raleigh/Cary chambers of commerce. Your passion for the area always shines through. Did you grow up there, or move from somewhere else???
Thanks Bull City. As soon as someone tells me to stay away from something I'm sure to be attracted (probably b/c I'm an artist and open to other ways of seeing things). I guess I asked about Durham b/c I really want to be near my son in Cary... I see so many nice things about Cary, but quite honestly, I didn't grow up in a suburb in NewEngl, and when in college lived in Back Bay and old neighborhoods, and am most comfortable in older surroundings (the one I grew up and am attracted to still was a jumble of single houses, double deckers, triple...on tree lined streets and bus lines with deli's and ethnic stores and small markets and easy access to libraries, etc. In my older years I'm not at all sure I want to be in a suburban area, as it's so spread out, so much driving, and sometimes can have such a homogenous look to the neighborhoods. In one suburb I lived in once in the midwest I would always get lost looking for my own house! But one problem about the quirky older houses is energy efficiency. Here in NE they leak like a sieve and eat up heat and electricity like crazy. Even with wood heat the $$$ go up in smoke.
So, while I'm at it...how cold, generally does it get in this part of NC?
I'm coming in early July to see just how HOT it gets...you guys must be pretty gutsy to be able to thrive in the heat & humidity . Besides air conditioning, which I've never had, what tips do you have for not suffocating on hot summer nights?
FYI - There are many places to live in Cary where you can walk and/or bike ride to everything. Cary is not a typical suburb. There are even older homes in what some would call quaint areas, although I don't care for old myself. Cary has much more than chain restaurants as some would have you think. Based on what you have posted so far, I am thinking parts of Raleigh may be what would fit your needs the best.
The summers are really nice here. I enjoy the warmer weather with higher humidity. As long as I am in the shade, I can get all the relief I want. My front porch gets all afternoon shade and I have a huge screen porch in back with a ceiling fan. I am outside all the time. We play tennis in the summer afternoons in the sun. We adapted after the first year and now could never imagine living somewhere colder than NC on average.
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. Besides air conditioning, which I've never had, what tips do you have for not suffocating on hot summer nights?
Did you grow up there, or move from somewhere else???
