Durham is complex ... tell me more

[PDXmom]

Originally Posted by VickiR

We have been told that it is illegal for us to say ANYTHING about children, including comments like..."pools in n'hoods usually mean children are there" or "if you see school buses, you can see that children live in the n'hood" or anything similar. Crazy, huh?!!

Vicki, thanks for correcting me. It is crazy but I guess I can see how it's a slippery slope that could lead to abuse of the law.

Just one more comment about emailing the school's PTA Pres... I mentioned where I was considering moving and asked if she knew of kids the same age of my children. She was able to give me a little info that helped. Never hurts to ask.... but as Vicki said it's probably best to just knock on doors.

[Minier]

Minier, you went to Chapel Hill.

I grew up there and can completely relate to all you posted. It's actually less "authentic" and more new money now.

Did you go to Durham?

yes, we went to Chapel Hill and Carrboro, but our hotel was in Durham and we spent a lot of time going around Durham, both looking at some houses, as well as just driving and going out to dinner. Durham has a negative reputation that clearly only represents parts of it, but sadly affects all of it. We kept saying over and over, "wow, it's nice here!" (with a surprised tone) LOL - we had just expected it to be one big ghetto (and on our first trip, had focused more on Cary and Ch-Carrboro, and basically only drove through Durham on the highway). Don't get me wrong, I also ended doing some groceries in a not so good part of town, so I did see the other side of Durham's reality and know it's not all peachy-rosy.

I didn't know about the rules for realtors. I thought they were free to tell me anything. Now it makes more sense why she seemed to skirt certain questions. Was she not even allowed to tell me that she's not allowed to tell me about x, y, z? Weird.

Anyway, on trip #3 (which will basically be after we sell our house and find a rental down there), we'll have all the time in the world to spend more time in Ch-C and in Durham and make our final decision (feels like choosing between apples and oranges). We're skipping Raleigh (though I know there must be neighborhoods I would love there) because I don't even want the possibility of redistricting); same thing for Cary, plus it was too "beige" for me. I am, in the meantime, going to be calling PTA's and schools in Durham to hear more personal experiences.

[PDXmom]

Originally Posted by Minier

I am, in the meantime, going to be calling PTA's and schools in Durham to hear more personal experiences.

Good luck with your research! Let us know if you have questions.

[sarafit]

I'll take a stab at your questions -- I've lived here for almost 4 years We are from Minneapolis/St. Paul, where we lived in a tight urban community.

Our sons attend CREEKSIDE Elementary, which they and we love. We are lucky to be able to walk to it -- just mile from our house which is in the sliver of Chapel Hill in Durham (vs. Orange) County.

Our House is for sale by the way too (MLS 1712212).

Originally Posted by Minier

Long post, but bare with me ... we are here (triangle) and need information.

1. How bad is the "bad" really crime-wise and quality of life wise? How "segregated" are these areas?

I don't know - our school (Creekside Elementary) is diverse and safe.

Originally Posted by Minier

2. EXACTLY which are the top schools to look for (this is my top criteria)?

We love Creekside Elementary - you can petition to get in to it, but it's very popular, so it's best to live in the district. The principals are AWESOME! As our the teachers. It's incredibly diverse both socioeconomically (Mercedes driven kids to food stamps) and racially. It's real world with small classes, super kids and we couldn't be happier.

Only drawback for us -- not foreign language program.

Originally Posted by Minier

3. If you have to point to the "hot" spot in Durham, meaning where fun things are happening, outdoor festivals, music, restaurants, bars, etc ... where would that be?

Originally Posted by Minier

4. If you had to point to the "family" spots in Durham, things for little kids and family, where would that be?

We halfway between the downtowns Chapel Hill and Durham, so we go all over. In Durham we love the Historic Tobacco District (Baseball, farmer's market, restaurants), Duke Gardens, Museum of Life and Science, Duke Park. All of these are about 15 minutes from where we live.

In Chapel Hill, there is Kidzu Children's Museum, Botanical Gardens, Carrboro for just walking around and eating and shopping, Planetarium at UNC.

Originally Posted by Minier

5. How are the bike trails (and biking friendliness in Durham)?

Other than specifically designated trails such as the American Tobacco Trail in Durham or Bolin Creek Trail in Chapel Hill, biking is dangerous. The Twin Cities with all their snow has a ton of bike lanes on city streets. No such luck here.

HOWEVER, there is a great plan to put bike lanes along Connector streets. We have sidewalk near us so we can bike on it to Creekside.

Originally Posted by Minier

6. Being larger than CH or Carrboro, should one also expect that the pace of everyday life will be faster and that the traffic will be more crammed overall ... of is it not really THAT different?

No, not really at all. Actually, traffic in Chapel Hill is much worse. It takes me a lot more time to get around CH than Durham.

Originally Posted by Minier

7. Would Durham be too big to really get that "community" feel? Part of what I like about Carrboro is that it seems small enough to "cozy up" and feel like you are part of a community. How does that work in a larger city?

It's very community minded, more so than Chapel Hill, but less than Carrboro.

ALSO - realtors really tend to know just "their areas." We found our house ourselves!

Good luck and WELCOME!

[baby420]

try main street for your hotspots.... not just the tobacco campus. Sure the tobacco campus is packaged better but when you come to durham you want the actual grit. Main street epitomizes such grit.

try the pinhook for live music. Or the Republic and beyu caffe. These places are located along the 5 points district. For diner, I recommend Angus Barn. Honestly, they are the best in the triangle and one of the best in the country. The chef won some top chef competition.

Shiki Sushi in SW is good. I like Dillard's if you like authentic soul food. The best bbq imo.

ummmmm....

Don't forget the Dinosaur trail at Life and Science!


May I ask...


Do you really like Durham? Or were you just surprised?