Hi Bluesky.......sounds like your more confused than you were at the beginning of this thread!
I have my BA in Interior Design, but also have staged homes and I consult for real estate properties for sale. "Staging" is sort of a catch all term now for "getting your house "show-worthy". I'm an accredited staging professional, and can tell you that there are many levels and phases of staging. I prefer the term "showcasing".....because your aim is to show off the "property"....not your belongings.
Your realtor probably has a good idea of how your house will show, but it's best to know the competition before you decide to stage or do anything to "showcase" your home. You are wise to be thinking of this BEFORE you list....because it does take some thoughtful planning. I have had some nightmare experiences where houses sit on the market for months before the "light bulb" goes on and the home owner or realtor think of showcasing the house.
My first question to you would be.....what is the competition like in your area for your square footage and price range? Is it a sellers or buyers market in your area? If it falls into the latter, then you need to take a microscope and go over everything in your house. Factor in age and location, and you need to understand what you'll be up against in the market.
Next....start packing! Get everything unnecessary put away, off the walls, shelves and OUT of the closets. Now's the time to clear out distractions from the product....YOUR HOUSE!
When you get past that phase.....go outside and take a good long look at your curb appeal. Do you like what you see? This view of your home is the first chance to make a good impression to potential buyers. Tree trimming, light landscaping, clearing dead brush etc so you can SEE what you are selling is critical. A fresh coat of paint on the front door and power washing any dingy driveways or sidewalks always helps.
When you get to the nitty gritty of what to stage, think of what will sell your house. From what you are saying about your son's furniture does not sound like you are putting your house first. You just flat out don't want to move it unless necessary. Toss that idea out of your head and list it on Craigslist.com if you want to get rid of it. Often buyers on CL will come pick it up if you specify.
Since you said the rest of your house is in good condition, and you want to do a partial staging.....then you need to stage the rooms that SELL the house! Living room, master, dining room......and small vinyettes in baths and the kitchen will be the most important areas. You want to "suggest" a use for the room....don't "decorate". People like to see some furniture to get a perspective of how their furniture will look. Visit furniture stores and see how they have furniture "groupings" so you can see the effect without going overboard.
The idea of fresh flowers and fresh fruit and candles are great for open houses ONLY....but maintaining that through your listing is a burden that is unnecessary. Find real looking greenery or flowers for some sparkle here and there. Many furniture rental places have accessories and plants too.
Other points.....make sure the house is white glove clean and arrange to have it kept that way. Dead flies in window sills and cobwebs that build up are a sign of neglect and that they house has been on the market too long. Keep it a "living" space.....a feeling that someone can walk in with their furniture and set up home.
If possible....open blinds and shutters and drapes to maximize the space and enhance any views. Dark and shut in homes are like graveyards....nobody wants to move there.
Lastly....make sure it SMELLS GOOD! Not overpowering Pine Sol clean....just fresh and not musty or smelling of pet stains. Noses are powerful real estate detectives!
Staging/showcasing your home is really up to you! Don't wait for the realtor to suggest things. But don't hesitate to ask them their advice. A realtor with experience will know if you're going in the wrong direction. In most markets, the homeowner pays the staging professional, and rates vary from coast to coast.
Good luck to you! Write me if you have any questions. I'll be glad to help!