Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
The OP's dad is in need of some kind of help. The OP seems to want to get dad's house torn down instead of emptied out.
Small steps first.
Got to get dad to operate on a rational level and if some "magic fairy from across the inter webs" is feeding the OP's desire to just tear the place down this is NOT helpful...
Maybe it will cost more to fix than it is worth, THAT IS SOMETHING THAT WILL REQUIRE ESTIMATES FROM LOCALLY EXPERIENCED people to make: OP needs to get a Competitive Market Analysis AS WELL AS estimates for the cost of repairs. It makes sense to hold off on either of those steps UNTIL THE PLACE IS CLEARED OUT OF THE DUMPSTER FULL OF STUFF that the OP says dad could take MONTHS to do. AFTER THAT IS DONE, qualified contractors should be contacted. They should provide detailed estimates FREE OF CHARGE. Similarly locally experienced real estate agents should be able to generate a Competitive Market Analysis free of charge. This data. along with information about how much equity dad has in the property, can be used to determine if it makes sense to fix the property up or attempt to sell it.
None of these can happen if dad does not get some help. I think we can all agree that something is VERY WRONG with a person that has a "normal" job but ignores the fact that the exterior brick veneer has collapse on one wall, the ceiling has collapsed inside a portion of the home and there are leaks / foundation issues. This is NOT just a real estate issue! Could be drinking / depression / anxiety / hormones / mental illness... OP needs to figure out a multi-pronged plan to help.
Maybe it will cost more to fix than it is worth, THAT IS SOMETHING THAT WILL REQUIRE ESTIMATES FROM LOCALLY EXPERIENCED people to make
Did you miss the part where I said that?
Quote:
the fact that the exterior brick veneer has collapse on one wall, the ceiling has collapsed inside a portion of the home and there are leaks / foundation issues.
It's not veneer. The OP said there was nothing left but sheetrock between the inside and the outside.
Sheetrock dissolves in water, and it's going to be raining soon. There is going to be no wall at all.
Quote:
This is NOT just a real estate issue! Could be drinking / depression / anxiety / hormones / mental illness... OP needs to figure out a multi-pronged plan to help.
The OP's dad is in need of some kind of help. The OP seems to want to get dad's house torn down instead of emptied out.
Small steps first.
Got to get dad to operate on a rational level and if some "magic fairy from across the inter webs" is feeding the OP's desire to just tear the place down this is NOT helpful...
Maybe it will cost more to fix than it is worth, THAT IS SOMETHING THAT WILL REQUIRE ESTIMATES FROM LOCALLY EXPERIENCED people to make: OP needs to get a Competitive Market Analysis AS WELL AS estimates for the cost of repairs. It makes sense to hold off on either of those steps UNTIL THE PLACE IS CLEARED OUT OF THE DUMPSTER FULL OF STUFF that the OP says dad could take MONTHS to do. AFTER THAT IS DONE, qualified contractors should be contacted. They should provide detailed estimates FREE OF CHARGE. Similarly locally experienced real estate agents should be able to generate a Competitive Market Analysis free of charge. This data. along with information about how much equity dad has in the property, can be used to determine if it makes sense to fix the property up or attempt to sell it.
None of these can happen if dad does not get some help. I think we can all agree that something is VERY WRONG with a person that has a "normal" job but ignores the fact that the exterior brick veneer has collapse on one wall, the ceiling has collapsed inside a portion of the home and there are leaks / foundation issues. This is NOT just a real estate issue! Could be drinking / depression / anxiety / hormones / mental illness... OP needs to figure out a multi-pronged plan to help.
No more emoticons?
The OP does not have to do what we say.
You ask the internet, you get all kinds of opinions. The OP obviously has a LOT to consider in his situation, and in this case, knowing all available options is better.
OP admits they have ZERO knowledge of real estate / home maintenance. What people with the least bit of knowledge would recognize as sheathing they almost certainly are calling sheetrock. How often have you seen structural masonry collapse? How often has that collapse revealed sheetrock as opposed to a plaster wall?
OP admits they have ZERO knowledge of real estate / home maintenance. What people with the least bit of knowledge would recognize as sheathing they almost certainly are calling sheetrock. How often have you seen structural masonry collapse? How often has that collapse revealed sheetrock as opposed to a plaster wall?
Good points. I have seen sheetrock inside masonry, but it would imply a remodel in, what, the last 30 years? Which doesn't sound like this house. (Plus the sheetrock would normally be attached to the masonry and fall with it...)
If someone, even a relative was trying to pressure me to give up my house for some lousy apartment or condo they would get my boot in their backside. It may not be a showplace but it is MY HOUSE!!! Even with a job a great number of people are barely living from paycheck to paycheck and it isn't going to change anytime soon. Renting a dumpster could mean having to skip a couple months paying the electric bill. There was a time when families pitched in to help each other. Now it looks like families only come over to criticize and possibly cause trouble. If you get zoning or the health dept. involved all you would be doing is causing him trouble. They would be only too happy to start hitting him with huge fines so that they could eventually take his property and throw him out on the street.
I'm retired so I had to make the very tough decision to give up my car to be able to pay the bills and get caught up on my mortgage payments. It's a miserable life not being able to go anywhere or do anything but it could be worse. I could have relatives coming over to criticize and cause trouble.
Dad is going thru some sort of emotional issues, depression or what have you due to the divorce. I would bet that at this stage in life he is thinking that his life is over. Was this a long marriage? Not that it matters but could it be that his thoughts on how his life has turned out are keeping him from progressing into something productive?
He is working and has what seems to be a secure and respected position at work. When he is away from the house it would seem that his problems are forgotten or at least he is able to deal with them. Saying that, it would seem that he needs a project to work on that would get his thoughts away from thinking of the former marriage if that is the issue.
Personally when I have issues that I am working on I need a good project to focus on to get me out of the funk. Something that takes all my time and gives me something to think about. Because of the condition of the house I would suggest that this become the project.
here is what I would do:
Get him to dream about a new house. Start showing him plans on what kind of house he could have on the 5 acre lot. If rebuilding the home is something that would make him happy then go with it. Maybe that is not the place to rebuild though. Would a new home on the same 5 acre lot work better? I have no idea if he has the money to build a new home but I don't think it matters if he just needs to have something to focus on.
When he gets excited about starting a new life maybe get a builder involved. See if you can get someone to give an estimate on the rebuilding of the home or what it would cost to build a new home. You may even research funding methods if that is an issue.
You can have people look at the house without listing it. Call contractors, have an inspection, even have investors who buy distressed properties look at it. Then you will have an idea of what you are really dealing with.
Dad decides in the end what will be done. If he will allow you to help get the above info, get on it quickly before he changes his mind. But please don't pressure him to toss everything and move to a tiny apartment if he's not of that mind, it will stop all progress.
Get him to dream about a new house. Start showing him plans on what kind of house he could have on the 5 acre lot. If rebuilding the home is something that would make him happy then go with it. Maybe that is not the place to rebuild though. Would a new home on the same 5 acre lot work better? I have no idea if he has the money to build a new home but I don't think it matters if he just needs to have something to focus on.
When he gets excited about starting a new life maybe get a builder involved. See if you can get someone to give an estimate on the rebuilding of the home or what it would cost to build a new home. You may even research funding methods if that is an issue.
I hope the best for your dad and his home.
OP, I'm going through something very similar with my ex. I haven't discovered a solution for our situation, but I see one for you in SOON2's suggestion.
The house is on 5 acres. Move a mobile home onto the property & tie into the water & septic. Your father can live in the mobile and let the house with all the stuff rot (it's probably a teardown anyway). Your dad can go visit his hoard when he wants, but he won't have to live in the dangerous situation. I feel for you -- it's a very difficult situation.
OP, I'm going through something very similar with my ex. I haven't discovered a solution for our situation, but I see one for you in SOON2's suggestion.
The house is on 5 acres. Move a mobile home onto the property & tie into the water & septic. Your father can live in the mobile and let the house with all the stuff rot (it's probably a teardown anyway). Your dad can go visit his hoard when he wants, but he won't have to live in the dangerous situation. I feel for you -- it's a very difficult situation.
That's a GREAT idea! Or a rental RV, or you can get those super-cute prefab cottages...
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.