Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
You just moved in; did you really expect instant bonding with your neighbors?
I never see my neighbors in the winter, either, unless we're all shoveling snow, or to wave as we run from the house to the car. I certainly don't think the neighborhood is lacking.
I just moved from a townhouse neighborhood to a single family home neighborhood. At my old house, I was friends with lots of my neighbors. You saw them on walks, you saw them when you took out the trash or walked to the car or went to the playground. It was nice to be able to stop and chat and catch up with people just by going out to your car.
Now, on the other hand, I rarely see anyone. We are on quarter acre lots and we know our direct neighbors, and I met a few people while I was out walking in the fall (just moved in September), but now it's so cold, everyone is staying inside and I don't see ANY of our neighbors. Even in the winter at the townhouse we saw our neighbors all the time.
Anyone else feel lonely in these single family homes? I like having the space for the kids but I REALLY miss the cohesive feel of my old neighborhood.
WOW, thank you for confirming what I always feared. I have lived in my townhouse for 27 years. I have been financially able to buy a single family home for years, but I always feared the exact same loneliness that you're describing. With my son grown and gone, it's just me now and I really enjoy the almost daily interaction with my neighbors. I haven't lived in a single family home since I was 12 and my parents got divorced. Since then it was always apartments, college dorms, more apartments and even when I lived on my boat for a while, there were plenty of neighbors nearby. I have always thought that living in a single family home all by myself would be lonely, it's nice to know I'm not crazy for thinking that way.
I bought my first house in the late '70s and I have never regretted owning my own house, the freedom from landlord rules, the freedom from putting from noisome, noisy and noxious neighbors. You just need a different personal interaction skill set to leave the creche of apartmentalism and join a community.
I would never leave my SFR (house) to rejoin a condo or apartment community.
Admittedly you can end up with bad neighbors in a SFR too, and worse, you have to sell to get away from them. But despite 40 years of living in an SFR I have always dealt with or endured neighbor problems until they moved.
One bit of advice: don't buy a house without double- or triple-paned windows. And the better the neighborhood (more expensive) the better neighbors you get. Although I would not like to live next to (just picking a celeb at random) Justin Timberlake or Madonna. Well maybe... Anyway Madonna does not live in the US. (Probably a smart lady.)
I bought my first house in the late '70s and I have never regretted owning my own house, the freedom from landlord rules, the freedom from putting from noisome, noisy and noxious neighbors. You just need a different personal interaction skill set to leave the creche of apartmentalism and join a community.
I would never leave my SFR (house) to rejoin a condo or apartment community.
Admittedly you can end up with bad neighbors in a SFR too, and worse, you have to sell to get away from them. But despite 40 years of living in an SFR I have always dealt with or endured neighbor problems until they moved.
One bit of advice: don't buy a house without double- or triple-paned windows. And the better the neighborhood (more expensive) the better neighbors you get. Although I would not like to live next to (just picking a celeb at random) Justin Timberlake or Madonna. Well maybe... Anyway Madonna does not live in the US. (Probably a smart lady.)
I guess I've been lucky. My neighbors on either side of me have been adults with no kids or pets and I never have heard a sound from either of them...ever. Our townhomes are double sheer walled and super soundproof. I'm one of those strange people who actually LIKE the rules. No barking dogs, no screaming kids or jacked up cars. I have a pool, spa and tennis courts to use, but no maintenance. And I like seeing my neighbors like the OP said. I do own the place, out right, so I can live here forever for just the property taxes and the HOA fee. It's about 2,000 sq ft, so plenty of room. They'll probably carry me out of here feet first. LOL
We are of a like mind, except me with my SFR and you with your condo. My house has just two neighbors, and in a hilly area where the commons places a green belt between me and my neighbors behind about 50+ feet below me.
It's a fairly expensive neighborhood meaning that parents expect their children to behave and go to college, my neighbors' kids are tweens and teens (nice kids) and neither has barking dogs.
I'm here too, hope I have another 25 good years and planning on leaving feet first.
Note that if my neighbors ever get barking dogs I have the defenses of (1) the HOA rules, and (2) LA County Animal Control.
By the way, the secret of not creating barking dog problems is to take your dog inside at night. All your dog wants anyway is to be with his family (pack). The majority of barking dog problems are caused by people who thoughtlessly put their dogs out at night to fend on their own.
How would you like to be put out in the night in the cold to sleep by yourself? If I was a dog I'd bark my displeasure until my barker got sore.
One of the things I like about townhouse living is the close proximity of neighbors. It's not as though I am best buds with any of them--I am an older woman living alone, and my neighbors are all married and different ages--but I go outside and there's one neighbor out smoking her cigarette and other with her kid walking their dog and we say hello to one another and exchange pleasantries. It's nice.
I would love to have a 10 acre compound and never see a neighbor, but my dogs would hate it, they love walking around the block and stopping in front of different houses and seeing other dogs and people.
My experience was the opposite. When we lived in apartment we didn't know any neighbors. But after moving to a house we knew almost everyone on the block. Of course by then we had children.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Anyway Madonna does not live in the US. (Probably a smart lady.)
