Homeownership is overwhelming... (countertop, foreclosure, 6%, commission)

[Warningsign]

My fiancé and I searched for the perfect house for nearly a year. We really did our research. In July, we found an amazing foreclosure that was in great condition, or so we thought. It was about $20,000 over our very conservative budget, so we went for it. Basically, we paid $300,000 for this beautiful 2600 square-foot, three bedroom, two bathroom house with granite countertops, a perfectly done backyard with the fruit trees, custom cabinets, high ceilings... I could go on and on! In an amazing area of town with mountain views. Our incomes combined at the time were around 170K, and five months later with raises we are at abut 200K a year income. so the house was a little more expensive than I wanted but it is within our budget.

We got a good inspection. There were two things about the house that we knew weren't perfect. One, it's a 23-year-old house, which is a little older than we wanted but in my town it's almost impossible to get a new house in the city. The other thing about it, it had polybutylene pipes. We had a homeowners insurance policy pull reports and they couldn't find any past claims on the pipes. Sometimes these pipes fail, but in some circumstances I guess they just don't because they haven't yet. But still, we were really nervous about the We were about to walk away from the house on the basis of that issue, but we learn that for about $8000 we could eventually replace them. We also knew that eventually the upstairs AC would have to be replaced as it was 23 years old, another 4K to do that. So there were a few major things but everything else looked good. We were in love with the house.

Five months later and all I can say is I'm just plain overwhelmed. One of our living rooms is still completely empty, as is our office and spare bedroom. I feel overwhelmed with trying to decorate the place and make it look good. It's almost just too big and intimidating. I've become picky about the furniture being high quality because the house looks so nice, so I end up not getting anything at all. So every day I come home to paintings propped up against walls of empty rooms. I have no sense of design style and the longer we wait to decorate, the more daunting it seems. In addition, we've run into some other problems. We've had two roof leaks since moving in with all the storms. My fiancé is very handy and was able to fix the first one, but the second one was a little more complicated and was a $1000 repair. Deep down I feel like what we need is a roof replacement. It's an old house with a lovely tile roof but the underlayment is probably shot. We've had to fix a lot of other relatively minor things, but the whole ordeal is causing me so much anxiety. I think on a subconscious level maybe I don't want to buy furniture and get completely settled in because my fear has me 1 foot out the door psychologically. I realize part of me is being dramatic, but part of me really wishes I had just gone with a newly built home and one of the newer developments. Yes, I would have gotten a much smaller house in a much less desirable area, but then I wouldn't have to worry about my roof caving in. I always had reservations about the age of the house but I guess I let myself get convinced by my dad and my fiancé's dad, who have lived in any homes over the years and just felt like I was being dramatic.

I long for the days of renting. LOL. But seriously, what should I do? Should I try to stay in this house as long as possible because I love it, and just bite the bullet and replace the roof and do the pipes? All of those things seem so incredibly expensive to do. And I know that's just the beginning of it, I would probably have to replace so many more things along the way. Or should I cut my losses and try to sell the house in two years? The good news is, we paid only about 3 grand in closing costs so our sunk costs are lower than most.

[Jkgourmet]

You do realize that when you sell, the realtor commission is going to take 6% of the selling price, right? Your "sunk cost" is more than three grand.

Frankly, it sounds to me like you're a bit of a perfectionist. Looking for "the perfect house for nearly a year" was a dead giveaway.

Buy some furniture. It doesn't need to be expensive or beautiful. Put up the freaking pictures. You can easily rearrange them any time you feel like it. This is your HOME. Make it comfortable and convenient, not a showroom. None of this is life and death. Basically, what I'm saying is chill out and grow up.

[jambo101]

23 year old house isnt that old and shouldnt require major repairs unless the build quality was sub par.
You also need to spend a bit of money and hire an interior designer/decorator to give you some ideas on how to set up the house.

[jghorton]

Buyer's remorse is not that uncommon for new homeowners. Try to keep the drama in check. Get a decorator to help get the place livable (you can always replace furniture items as you move along). In this market, you will likely soon began to understand the concept of appreciation, tax write-offs and choosing your own neighbor/hood.

Remember, the stress you are feeling is in you, not in the house. Life is full of a lot bigger challenges than you are dealing with now. Take a deep breath and let go of notions of a perfect, movie-set life. (BTW, we moved out of SFH's into 'upscale' condo-life about 15 years ago to get the oceanfront location we wanted and avoid the ongoing upkeep and maintenance hassles of home ownership. No regrets!)

[Stacey27520]

I have moved ALOT, and sometimes you just have let it be for awhile. It's okay to have empty space. When I bought a piece of furniture, I thought in terms of the uses it had, how long I wanted it, would it fit in in another room or in another house...is it timeless? I've downsized now and have the same living room furniture I had when my boys were babies, 30 years ago. I've recovered it and cleaned the wood parts up, but it's solid and it fit well in all the homes I lived in. I've tried to learn about repurposing and redoing furniture and making it useful in other ways. I have a mixture of styles, some hand me downs, and it comes together eventually. The biggest mistakes I've made were buying decorative items that didn't work and ended up in yard sales.

Check out flea markets, yard sales, thrift shops to find useable tables, mirrors etc, that just need cleaning and a can of spray paint in a snazzy color to decorate. I get ideas from Pinterest too. Good luck and enjoy your open space!

[Ohiogirl81]

Ah ... new homeowners.

You need to abandon your idea of perfection. You'll never achieve it, and you'll just set yourself up for frustration. A house is always a work in progress -- including furnishings -- for as long as you live in it. You'll always have a to-do list, there always will be something that needs fixing or adjusting or reorganizing.

It seems like you got in over your head with a house that's too big for you, but there's nothing you can do about that now.

What you can do is drop the drama. Your roof isn't going to cave in and your pipes aren't going to spring leaks tomorrow. A 23-year-old house isn't old.

Relax and buy some furniture -- start with one piece you love, and go from there. You don't have to do it all at once. Buy a sofa for the living room. Live with it for a few months, then hunt for end tables or a chair. Lather, rinse and repeat until the room is furnished.

[WorldKlas]

Suck it up buttercup. Its a great house and a tile roof lasts forever with maintenance. I have owned dozens of houses and have NEVER had to replace a tile roof -- homes built in the 1940's thru 1960's. Great roofs.

Craigslist has some fabulous deals on furniture. Just search occasionally. Put some mats down and make one a workout room, too.

Hang those pictures. If you don't like them where you hang them, a $3 tub of spackle is all you need to cover all the nailholes in your house for 2 years.

[davebarnes]

Originally Posted by Warningsign

part of me really wishes I had just gone with a newly built home.

That would have been the smart action.

New houses never have settling issues.
New house never leak.
New houses house never need landscaping.
New houses come fully furnished.
New houses never have an appliance fail one day after the warranty expires.

[homeonthelittlemountain]

Find an interior designer you get along with. Interview a few to make sure you're on the same wavelength. Maybe a designer who is just starting out....like you. Someone you can pay by the hour, not someone who is paid commisssion in a furniture store.

Then work with them to draw up a long term design plan for the house. You don't have to buy anything now but as long as you have a plan perhaps your anxiety will be reduced. Then slowly buy what you need. Have fun with estate sales and Craigslist. It takes time, lots of time, to develop a sense of what you like and what makes you happy. There is nothing wrong with having empty rooms for a few years while you acquire what you love.

You are so lucky! You have 2700 sq. Ft. You never have to move again if you're staying in the area. Take a long view and try to relax. 23 years is not old for a house.

[DaveinMtAiry]

I agree you are causing unnecessary stress by being too picky. You bought a $300,000 with a combined income of $200,000? You make WAY more per purchase price than just about everyone in American, you can certainly afford to pick up some furniture. And a 23 year old house is in no way considered old, thjer dad's are correct, you are being overly dramatic.

If you think hanging pictures is stressful wait until you try to get fruit from your trees before the bugs get into them. Fruit trees are a beotch!