Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I sent a link to this thread to both my husband and my male married email friend/penpal. They both laughed. But both were saddened by the fact that so many people have marriages that a close friend of the opposite sex would be a threat.
I asked my penpal/friend if I should send all his emails to my husband for his review. He said that would be OK but if I did the future emails he would send me would be quite dull and boring because he would now be self conscious about being open to me thinking my husband would be analyzing what he said and might be judgemental.
I didn't say (and don't think) a close friend of the opposite sex is a threat. So don't feel sorry for me. Not sure why you quoted me, then made that comment..? I think I was agreeing with you more than most people in this thread.
My husband has a close friend at work. After work, we run together and he just tells me what they talked about at work. It's just part of our conversation, not him really reporting. I have a friend at work like that, too. We don't email, but we're friends and talk about a lot of stuff. I also have a former coworker I email often. It's no big deal because we aren't hiding things. Hiding things is where things get dangerous. I don't think friendship, talking, joking, or having things in common, is dangerous--just hiding things.
If your relationship is understanding and secure, then your husband won't be jealous or judgemental about what your friend says in the emails.
Of course, it really comes down to what you and your husband are comfortable with. I'm just commenting since you asked.
email_lover , some people just don't get that they can't controll every blooming thing.
I have no idea if you saw my first post or not, but a tale is, I stayed a night in a motel with my wife and a buddy. I couldn't ride another inch that night in Cal, after crossing the country, and so didn't make it that night to my buddies house, his wife was miffed, because 'he spent the night with another woman in a motel!' The fact that i was there, and the woman was my wife, and it was the dead last room in the town mattered not a whitt.
If I was married to a gal like that she would be gone.
A couple years back, I took another gal from New Zealand who had her bike shipped and it was delayed, to Maine so she could see the coast. My wife KNEW we would share a room somewhere that night, since there is no going that far and turning around. This was no problem for my wife, me and or that gal, nor her hubby, who was in New Zealand still.
The facts are most people can't allow their spouses that sort of freedom. It drives them up a wall over maybe, and or what other people think, and probably this idea about what other people think, is where you made a error with the threads.
No one much likes another, who can do something they can not. Just the way it is.
email_lover , some people just don't get that they can't controll every blooming thing.
I have no idea if you saw my first post or not, but a tale is, I stayed a night in a motel with my wife and a buddy. I couldn't ride another inch that night in Cal, after crossing the country, and so didn't make it that night to my buddies house, his wife was miffed, because 'he spent the night with another woman in a motel!' The fact that i was there, and the woman was my wife, and it was the dead last room in the town mattered not a whitt.
If I was married to a gal like that she would be gone.
A couple years back, I took another gal from New Zealand who had her bike shipped and it was delayed, to Maine so she could see the coast. My wife KNEW we would share a room somewhere that night, since there is no going that far and turning around. This was no problem for my wife, me and or that gal, nor her hubby, who was in New Zealand still.
The facts are most people can't allow their spouses that sort of freedom. It drives them up a wall over maybe, and or what other people think, and probably this idea about what other people think, is where you made a error with the threads.
No one much likes another, who can do something they can not. Just the way it is.
The way I've read and followed this thread, you're comparing apples to oranges and the situations that you've been in are quite different from that which the OP is in. The OP has changed her story a few times about the extent of her relationship with her "email pal" and, frankly, I find her jumping in with this story about having linked both her husband and her email pal to this thread to be just a little off kilter. In fact going on the basis of her other posts in just three short days on CD I'm considering that there may be a little bit of odor emanating from under a dark bridge. We shall see.
STT, that might well be since I don't exactly study these threads all that hard. I tend to read the fist page and take it from there to form a point of view. So missed the details of twists if that is fact.
The OP would know if little lies enter the thread, but not me. Thanks fer the heads up, and if the OP is lieing, it will come back to bite her. No one here can do a thing about that.
STT, that might well be since I don't exactly study these threads all that hard. I tend to read the fist page and take it from there to form a point of view. So missed the details of twists if that is fact.
The OP would know if little lies enter the thread, but not me. Thanks fer the heads up, and if the OP is lieing, it will come back to bite her. No one here can do a thing about that.
I think in some respects the Relationship forum is one of the more difficult to respond to as it does entail rather more than a cursory look at the first page to come up with a response when the OP inevitably pops in with more details to add to the tale at hand! A recipe forum or an auto forum or a fix-it dishwasher forum or a gardening forum, etc. are usually more of a simple challenge.
You're right, nobody can do anything if any poster is either trolling or fibbing but calling them out is fair game if things don't add up. Cheers!
Keep asking and maybe someone with no moral compass at all will tell you to go ahead and bang the guy. That's really what you're after here, isn't it? Permission to cheat on your husband and have an affair with this guy?
Hint: If you are this transparent online, you'll never be able to pull off an affair in the flesh.
^^^^These are exactly my feelings on this issue.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
