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I was still looking, but not really for more than new friends, like I said earlier in the thread, we had just been flirting and shy for a few months first..... then the last few weeks things picked up, the last week really more than anything.... he had already pointed me out to his mom before things kind of started up, so it is something we were both kind of thinking of but were still looking around until just now.
Now I am in the scared of getting hurt stage.
First time even trying dating really since I had my son.
Oh well, I am back to work full time so that will keep me nice and busy and distracted.
I am allways happy when i am single, so I will see where this goes and then if it dosen't go anywhere go back out of it again...
I just wanted to get to know more people, wasn't really "looking", so it kinda took me by suprise.
So you want to be exclusive after essentially only 1 week? Honey I'm all about the being smitten - it's fabulous. But how can you even know him well enough after a week to know if you like him that much? I know I'm totally discounting the 1 month of shy flirtation - but only because that has nothing to do with knowing someone.
I think it's time for a talk. It's time you talk to him about were the two of you stand. Are you an item, just casual dating, friends? It's time to have this discussion. It's easy to mis-read the actions of someone else. From what you posted, I don't see a clear and direct "answer". More importantly, you are not certain.
Here's a good way to start the topic. Simply ask if you can talk. Say, "Can I ask you something?". Then say that you have really enjoyed seeing him and would like to continue to see him. Flat out say that you are not clear where this is going - and would like his input on where he sees this going. Make it clear that you would like to take things slowing. Be honest (without details) and tell him you are getting over a very difficult relationship and value his friendship and the time you spend with him. Be sure this is a discussion - NOT a speach. Listen to what he has to say and don't react overly to anything. If he pops up with a disapointing.... well, I thought we were just friends, hanging out. - keep the conversation going and tell him you value his friendship.
What ever his reaction and comments - sleep on it. Don't do anything until you have had a chance to think it through.
Take care of yourself, my friend.
So you want to be exclusive after essentially only 1 week? Honey I'm all about the being smitten - it's fabulous. But how can you even know him well enough after a week to know if you like him that much? I know I'm totally discounting the 1 month of shy flirtation - but only because that has nothing to do with knowing someone.
yeah, I guess I am just old fashioned, but I don't really date around at all, let alone date more than one person at a time.....
Like I said before this dating in the 21st century thing just sucks...
So it may be normal for people to date more than one person at a time these days???
Isn't that a bit desperate?
Shouldn't people just "accidentally" end up with someone because of a connection, instead of be dating all around and then pick one?
Mabey it is just me..... mabey I need to learn more about this dating thing because I am already ready to throw in the towell and just stay single and be the cat lady...
I have been single for most of the last 7 years because my ex wouldn't leave me alone for 2 seconds to ever even talk to another guy..
Mabey I need some practice first....
Of course I am just thinking out loud here....we'll see how I feel next time I see him..... knowing me, all will be forgotten and I'll be standing two stairs up waiting for a hug, lol....
Oh me and my indecision..... I am not even sure if it is the "idea" of him I like, or him..... well, I like everything about him so far, but if he has to like me for who I am too, flaws and all...... and I have a lot of them...but I like my flaws, they make me who I am, so.... I won't be changing anything about me for anybody.
Yeah, I am just in the insecure stage I guess...... wonder what stage he is in, lol....poor guy.....I am a hard one to nail down..... kinda like the runaway bride, someone is gonna have to get me by letting me be me, and letting me go a bit.
I think I was scared off by a lot of the "you have a guy now" talk, and my friends making WAY too big a deal about it...... plus my friends really need to give us some space.
My one friend has been over every day, giving us no time alone. I even asked her to give us some space and time alone so we could get to know each other, and she still keeps tagging along, because she has a crush on his friend, so she wants to make it all about her, so mabey he will talk her up to his friend...... annoying as heck
yeah, I guess I am just old fashioned, but I don't really date around at all, let alone date more than one person at a time.....
Like I said before this dating in the 21st century thing just sucks...
So it may be normal for people to date more than one person at a time these days??? FROM MY UNDERSTANDING IT IS. I'M LIKE YOU THOUGH, I ONLY DATE ONE GUY AT A TIME - BUT I DON'T ASSUME THE SAME FROM HIM. I MAY IF I CAN MANAGE TO FIND TWO GUYS WHO CATCH MY INTEREST.
Isn't that a bit desperate? NO, I THINK MOST PEOPLE FIND IT EFFICIENT. THERE'S A LOT TO CONSIDER WHEN TRYING TO DECIDE ON A SUITABLE MATCH, AND IF SOMEONE HAS AN END GOAL OF MARRIAGE OR RELATIONSHIP THEN TO ME IT MAKES SENSE TO ME.
Shouldn't people just "accidentally" end up with someone because of a connection, instead of be dating all around and then pick one? OMG NO!!!!!!! GOOD RELATIONSHIPS DON'T HAPPEN BY ACCIDENT. GOOD GRIEF GIRL, YOU BE PARTICULAR ABOUT WHO YOU END UP WITH AS SHOULD HE.
Mabey it is just me..... mabey I need to learn more about this dating thing because I am already ready to throw in the towell and just stay single and be the cat lady...
I have been single for most of the last 7 years because my ex wouldn't leave me alone for 2 seconds to ever even talk to another guy..
Mabey I need some practice first....
Of course I am just thinking out loud here....we'll see how I feel next time I see him..... knowing me, all will be forgotten and I'll be standing two stairs up waiting for a hug, lol....
Oh me and my indecision..... I am not even sure if it is the "idea" of him I like, WORDS OF WISDOM. TO ME ANYONE WHO HAD YOUR OVERWHELMING EMOTIONAL RESPONSE LIKES THE IDEA, HE IS NOT A CANVASS FOR YOU TO PAINT YOUR WANTS ON HIM. TAKE SOME TIME AND GET TO KNOW HIM, HECK YOU MAY NOT FIND HE IS THE PERSON FOR YOU. or him..... well, I like everything about him so far, but if he has to like me for who I am too, flaws and all...... and I have a lot of them...but I like my flaws, they make me who I am, so.... I won't be changing anything about me for anybody. DARN STRAIGHT.
Yeah, I am just in the insecure stage I guess...... wonder what stage he is in, lol....poor guy.....I am a hard one to nail down..... kinda like the runaway bride, someone is gonna have to get me by letting me be me, and letting me go a bit.
I think I was scared off by a lot of the "you have a guy now" talk, and my friends making WAY too big a deal about it...... plus my friends really need to give us some space.
My one friend has been over every day, giving us no time alone. I even asked her to give us some space and time alone so we could get to know each other, and she still keeps tagging along, because she has a crush on his friend, so she wants to make it all about her, so mabey he will talk her up to his friend...... annoying as heck
HONEY I WISH YOU WELL, I HOPE HE IS THE MAN OF YOUR DREAMS AND YOU THE WOMAN OF HIS. IT'S JUST IN MY OPINION YOU NEED TO SLOW DOWN, YOUR HEART IS ON YOUR SLEEVE. THAT'S A GOOD WAY TO GET HURT - GIVE YOUR HEART FREELY, BUT ONLY AFTER YOU'VE HAD ENOUGH TIME TO DEEM EACH OTHER WORTHLY OF THAT GIFT.
well i am just rambling now, lol...
Forgive - I have no idea how the multi quote works. So responses are above.
Boy is it hard, lol.... As a girl I just wanna jump right in and have someone to snuggle with full time, lol...
really delayed responce yeah i heard girls get more emotionally attached
than guys but i dont know i think most people want a solid relationship
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So responses are above.
