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They might love you and they might be giving you lots of hours, but you're missing too much work for the short time you've been working there. Just be aware of that. If you continue to miss work, they will cut back your hours or let you go. Don't assume that they will be understanding if you miss more work just because they were understanding a couple of times.
I have only missed one shift and went in for the majority of the other. I know not to miss a lot of work and I don't plan on it. Once I said I felt sick they took one look at me, saw I had no color and let me leave. It's not like I could have stopped that from happening.
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Originally Posted by Hopes
You are 20 years old, not 17 or 18. Your mother wants you to learn how to make these decisions for yourself. And she wants you to take action and actually do these things, not just talk about them. She's right about priorities. Remember? Cell phones and car insurance, not health insurance?
If either of my children are not reasonably responsible by 20, I will be talking to myself too!
They way I look at it and I know this all sends you guys into fits of rage lol but I am not giving up my cell phone.
And the way I look at it if I have a car, I have to pay for the insurance etc but my own car would allow me to work any job anywhere. The car would allow me to go work in the next town over if I needed to. I could search the entire denver metro area for a higher paying second job and my own car would allow me to be able to work MORE. THEN I can get health insurance.
Why would I spend nearly my entire months pay on some crappy ass health insurance this state has to offer for me?
Instead I can pay $140 a month for things I need and to take some financial stress off my mom, while saving the rest of my money. That's going to be able $300 extra that I have to save.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes
It's nice that you have an encouraging grandmother. But her feelings might be different if you lived with her and she continually saw no progress. Your mother and brother do sound like they have their issues. You should be planning to move.
Its not that I haven't been progressing.
I was told once I graduated if I wanted to live at home during this time that I either needed to be in school or working. I stopped college for the time being in April and its July, that's only 4 months and spent those 4 months looking for work and now found a job and I am still looking for another one, hell, this BB&B job may even give me about 30 hours a week, I am getting close to that, and my manager told me she is going to be giving me even more hours because we have two people leaving.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes
The saddest thing about your posts is that you are clearly looking for approval----not just here, but from people in your life. I don't know if it's because of your family life or if it's just a weakness in your character. Whatever the reason, you need to learn to find approval within yourself instead of seeking affirmation from others.
I don't have a weakness is my character. It is my family life. I can do something that I am asked to do and still get criticized because it wasn't how precious and her baby would have done it.
I could juggle fire, all while sh..ting sparkles and pissing excellence and it still wouldn't be enough.
...
I don't have a weakness is my character. It is my family life. I can do something that I am asked to do and still get criticized because it wasn't how precious and her baby would have done it.
I could juggle fire, all while sh..ting sparkles and pissing excellence and it still wouldn't be enough.
ok, i was with you until you said this.
everyone has weaknesses in their character, or we would all have the same character, our weaknesses and strengths are what make everyone different.
finding those weaknesses and strengthening them through knowledge and experience is the goal of life.
you're correct, no matter what you do you'll never do it right in her eyes. but thats not your fault. what is your fault, is complaining about it.
i don't mean to sound like i want to break up a family life, but if you give a crap what your mother thinks, she'll crap all over you. your job as a freshly minted 20something is to not give a crap about your parents needs, wants, expectations, or ordeals. they are grown people who have successfully established themselves in this life.
its your job to figure out how to do what they did, in your own way. yes they want to give you all this advice on what to do, how to do it, how they did it and how they hiked 15 miles in the snow up hill both ways!
your job is to take that information and use it to your advantage to succeed.
if you can find someone you can help, love and care for while doing it, all the better.
Trust me, get out while you are still sane. I grew up in a very verbally/emotionally abusive household and it does not get better. My mother will never acknowledge the abuse not to mention what is has done to my life. I wish I had moved across the country when I was your age. Now I find myself seething with rage, alot of it because of the fact I didn't get out when I could. Granted, there were extenuating circumstances. My point is you will never ever get validation from them, they are broken but you can save yourself. Don't be afraid to take chances, get a roommate(s), sacrifice so you're not overwhelmed with bills, and move out. There is no better feeling in the world than to be free of the manipuation, ect and to know you are self-sufficient, did it all on your own without anyone elses help. I never tired of this, knowing I was out of that negative environment and that I did it all by myself even if it took me a few yrs longer than I would have liked. Good luck!
I'm on percocet for my back, I am burning up, I feel like I am going to puke, I am dizzy and its making me pissed off so I am going to rant for a second but I have a legit problem. My dog ripped my fitted sheet earlier today and I got home not too long ago, maybe 1:30am everyone was still up so I went to find other sheets to change them.
I have chocolate brown sheets (the ones my dog ripped) and some white sheets, both are super nice and really soft.
They are the only sheets in my house that fit my bed, everyone elses bed is bigger or smaller
I went to look for my white sheets and they are no where to be found.
My mom insist I leave them in the shared area of the closet where the rest of the sheets are, so there they went and now I can't find them. She MOVES everything, forgets she did it and then can't find where she put things.
Same thing with my shoes. She INSIST I take them off in the house and leave them in the "shoe area". Then she moves them and forgets that she did it and will swear up and down she didn't move them.
I put my duty belt in my room, my cuffs were in my cuff case and the other day they were gone and they were in my mom's room...
My brother is NOT ALLOWED to touch my bike EVER. He since about 6 or 7 has BROKEN every single one of my bikes. He keeps getting my bike down now and riding it and now my padded seat thingy is gone.
Is it too unreasonable to tell everyone to just not touch my stuff?
She moves my stuff and then gets pissed when I get pissed at her for moving it.
I am so sick and tired of my stuff being gone. I am in the process of saving up money to move out and its going as fast as it can possibly go but until then I want to be able to move out with my things and not have to search for them all before I go.
I want her and my brother to not touch my stuff. HANDS OFF!!!!
And if they feel it absolutely necessary to touch my things, move them and place them somewhere else then they need to tell me as soon as they can and where they put it. If I find another thing missing because one of them I am going to start purposely hiding their things.
Its pissing me off people touching my stuff, moving it and losing it and not taking responsibility for doing so....it makes me so angry. DON'T TOUCH MY SH|T!!!!!
Is that too much to ask?
Although you are ranting at a high degree I can see what you are saying.
I feel the same way. I have things I don't want people messing with. It's mine and it's not yours.
Most of the time it is a lack of respect for privacy. I feel you respect other people's things.
When you borrow something put it back. Don't be inconsiderate and not put it where you left it...especially if it's not yours to begin with.
Often times you will find the people who have no organization skills leave their items somewhere and can't find it. So they ask you and you know exactly where it is. You tell them and then when you go to use it they didn't put it back.
Crazy!
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