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The thing with agoraphobia and panic disorders is that not everyone has all of the symptoms.I have no fear of being alone.If anything I enjoy being alone.I have no fear of crowded places.I have a fear of being in unpopulated areas because people who have panic disorders have a fear of people knowing about it and thinking they are crazy so in order to function I like being near places with bathrooms so I can go in there and isolate myself until my attack subsides.I hate being in places that are hard to leave such as cars and school classrooms.I was a home bound agoraphobic so yes I have that fear.I do not feel helpless.I have no dependence on others and I do not get that 'body is unreal' sensation like some do thank goodness.
Just curious--at what age did you first notice your symptoms?
And how did you deal with it when you were getting your college degree? Or did you study online?
Just curious--at what age did you first notice your symptoms?
And how did you deal with it when you were getting your college degree? Or did you study online?
At age 12.They were of puberty onset.
There is no treatment other than behavioral therapy and it never goes away completely.It is something I will live with for the rest of my life.I could never tell my parents for fear of being labeled crazy for my irrashional fear.Both my mother and my father have panic disorders so I was predisposed towards having one.
I had to work through my fear and I went to school in the traditional fashion.
There is a huge problem with this mis-concept. One is not necessarily essential to the other. They are two sides of the same coin - related but not intertwined UNLESS the partie wish them to be.
Read on, I will explain at the end.
Some of us do - and have. It's the role-play and the protocol (which are NOT essential components of the relationship) that generally don't survive if, in fact, they were a part of it.
Apples to oranges - whip you is S&M, submissive is relationship - you can have one without the other - or you can mix them but they can AND DO exist separately.
Nah, you didn't give away anything. Are you in a 24/7 relationship with any one in particular or do you mostly Top?
OK, folks - here's the REST of the story but first, the BEGINNING.
Basics: BDSM - Bondage, Dominance (or discipline), Sado-Masochism. Each are separate elements under the large umbrella term. There are other elements, such as fetishes and spankers, but we're basically one large group.
A relationship is just that, a relationship. It is a means by which people relate to each other. In a vanilla relationship, such as many of you reading this have, it may look like an Ozzie & Harriet set-up or a Ozzie & Sharon relationship. The thing is it isn't about singing or dancing or business or play or judging who has talent.
So, a Master/slave or Dominant/submissive or Owner/property relationship is about how the two (or more) parties interact with each other. It may be a Southern Baptist type "vanilla" relationship or a Hindu or Muslim relationship. It has NOTHING to do with pain or bondage or whether one eats from a bowl on the floor. It is simply that one person makes decisions and the other doesn't. There are variations within the groupings (no 2 relationships are the same obviously since no 2 people are the same). Someone leads the dance and someone follows.
Generally, within the above relationships, regardless of the gender or sex of the parties within said relationship, the one who is "in charge" is served by the one who is not. OK, looks pretty lopsided, doesn't it. But consider this: the one who is "doing the work" doesn't HAVE to be the one making decisions or worrying about the bills being paid; the one being served has ALL the responsibility not only for the household but for the relationship and for the individuals within the relationship. Whew - that's a lot of responsibility and that person deserves the perks! In a basic relationship, the D-type is faced with a decision. Sounds easy, right? WRONG. S/he has to decide first of all, what decision will best serve the relationship - as a unit, what will make it stronger; then has to take into consideration what is good for the individuals within that relationship and because the D-type is the kind of individual s/he is, the serving folks in the relationship are considered even before the D-type considers his/her own needs. EXCEPT in a M/s relationship where the Master - as a rule (don't forget there are exceptions to every rule in life) - generally considers slaves as property and therefore does not consider their needs before his.
Now, if you're still with me...........
There's role-play and play and protocol. These are NOT a part of the base relationship although they may be incorporated into the relationship much like a vanilla husband and wife might decide to go to the movies or join a bowling league.
In the OP's situation, they have established some protocols: one of which is how she eats and what/when she eats. That is not true for all M/s, D/s, O/p relationships. It is a "game" (the op's term), play, or protocol. SOME relationships have it, some do not.
Pain - that's the S&M part generally - and it can exist all on its own. But a lot of people use it for discipline much like a vanilla wife might decide not to make her husband's favorite dinner because she is mad at him, etc. Some relationships have pain, some don't - usually referred to as "scening" or "punishment".
Bondage - again, not a part of the relationship itself but may be incorporated by some in this type of relationship and OFTEN used by "vanillas".
I will stop here, because many of you have zoned out on me.
Ask questions. I need to go shopping (again) because that's what I do. I will be back to answer questions. There are at least 4 others with years of lifestyle experience who may or may not choose to out themselves as completely as I have and provide some answers. But in any case, your questions will be answered.
I am a girl so I don't think I can * top * lol !
Well , I have only been active with this in the last 5 years but in a LDR with a sub for 2 years . But we mix it up. He loves to be Dom'd and I love doing it
Sometimes I want him to get rough and be in charge so its an interesting mix We each love both ! So perhaps I am not a true Dom 100% of the time but with no instruction , just instinct , I do fair well...
I didn't zone out on you ! hehe....Fascinating to learn about my R and what makes us both tick.
We don't belong to anything. Its just something we talk about alot before hand and then its easy to love him and to please him with things. We believe in adventure in the bedroom and have never been vanilla !
Well , I have only been active with this in the last 5 years but in a LDR with a sub for 2 years . But we mix it up. He loves to be Dom'd and I love doing it
Sometimes I want him to get rough and be in charge so its an interesting mix We each love both ! So perhaps I am not a true Dom 100% of the time but with no instruction , just instinct , I do fair well...
I didn't zone out on you ! hehe....Fascinating to learn about my R and what makes us both tick.
We don't belong to anything. Its just something we talk about alot before hand and then its easy to love him and to please him with things. We believe in adventure in the bedroom and have never been vanilla !
Women can top.Believe me they can top.
There are some couples who like to 'switch' and that is perfectly normal but somewhat rare and most men do not like to be submissive in any fashion and view their dominance in the bedroom as a sign of their manhood.
There is no treatment other than behavioral therapy and it never goes away completely.It is something I will live with for the rest of my life.I could never tell my parents for fear of being labeled crazy for my irrashional fear.Both my mother and my father have panic disorders so I was predisposed towards having one.
I had to work through my fear and I went to school in the traditional fashion.
Wow--you've been able to participate in Judo competitions and go to college despite being a home bound agoraphobe and being afraid of sitting in a classroom. Congratulations! Do you take anti-anxiety meds, or are you just able to suck it up and get out there?
Sorry you weren't comfortable telling your parents about being an agoraphobe. Seems like they would have understood since they both had panic disorders.
Well on a typical night I will have dinner made and I will fix him a plate and myself a plate.However he is the only one who gets to sit at the table.I sit on the floor next to him unless I am told otherwise.He will eat his dinner and when he is finished he will cut my food into bite sized pieces and hold them out for me to eat.For drinks he will hold out a glass and tip it back according to how much he wants me to drink.It is not complicated.
There are some couples who like to 'switch' and that is perfectly normal but somewhat rare and most men do not like to be submissive in any fashion and view their dominance in the bedroom as a sign of their manhood.
Also he is more sub than anything. He gets so much out of it
But sometimes a girl just wants to be pushed down on the bed and have him take her
Wow--you've been able to participate in Judo competitions and go to college despite being a home bound agoraphobe and being afraid of sitting in a classroom. Congratulations! Do you take anti-anxiety meds, or are you just able to suck it up and get out there?
Sorry you weren't comfortable telling your parents about being an agoraphobe. Seems like they would have understood since they both had panic disorders.
It was really difficult to me and I was often picked up from school because I would have times where I just couldn't stand it anymore.The trick is to be long suffering and to never give up.Otherwise your disorder will win and once you give him an inch he will take a pound that will be difficult to get back!
I have a bad reaction to anti anxiety meds.They are like a double edged sword.You either get better with them or they make things twice as bad and they made it ALOT worse for me.I felt so much more edgy when I was on the various meds.
It was hard to tell my parents about it and I only managed to tell them about it when I was 20 yrs old.They would have understood but I spent a good deal of my time trying to be better than my parents since my brothers and sisters pretty much fail at life.I wanted to be the best at anything and everything to prove to myself that I was not like them and I had a good case of denial going on.
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