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One time, me and this woman met at the restaurant. It was a first date. We agreed to go get drinks...but she insisted on me giving her my address in case "we got lost." I thought it was weird, but I did it.
Things didn't work out. But she would send texts ALL THE TIME how I just HAD TO GIVE her another chance. I really didn't think I had to and I would tell her that.
Anyway one morning I got up to go to work and there was something on my windshield. A note on how much I meant to her and she couldn't get over it. I told her that was crazy and if she does it again I'll call the cops. Hadn't really heard from her since....
...until this morning. "So you really never want to talk to me again?" Yikes. She has hung onto my number for like 8 months.
*Tell her about your arm fetish you've had since kindergarten and then beg her to come out to your car so you can lick and suck her arms. In broad daylight--it's a coffee date after all.
*Invite her out to dinner, just as friends so you can talk about work, then order an appetizer off the menu to share and ask her to pay half before she's had a chance to offer. No problem, but when you walk her out to her car, wait until she gets in and then jump in yourself and stick your tongue down her throat and try to suck out her vocal chords. Tell her that as soon as her divorce goes thru you'll tell her that you love her. Beg her to come home with you and have sex b/c it's been so long. Then wonder why she doesn't return any of your phone calls.
*Pick her up at the door and before you get off her street, suggest that the two of you skip dinner and go get a motel room.
I hate to admit it but these are real and the first two happened within the last year. At my age. The second one turned into the stalker. Oh no wait--on another one I was my way out to meet a coffee date when he called and suggested that I dress like a young girl. That one never happened.
Thought this might be a fun thread...here's my list:
1.
Introduce him to your whole family. Make sure that you give your family
a heads up that they should be overly affectionate, hug, and say
"Welcome to the family!"
1a. Tell them about how much you've always loved them. Propose.
2. Talk about your ticking biological clock. Ask if he/she wants a large family
3. Talk about marriage
4. Talk about your ex--ad nauseaum. Talk in extremes--either how much you loved them/hated them. DO NOT be neutral.
5. Talk about your sex life/lack thereof
6. If you had offered to pay for dinner--come up short on the bill--accuse them of ordering/eating too much.
7. If you offered to pay--shoot them a look and tell them not to order
the most expensive thing on the menu. When they order, cut them off and
tell them that it's too much.
8. Drink too much. Get sloppy drunk.
9. Show up for your date already high, drunk, etc.
10. Don't shower/bathe before your date. In fact, go to the gym and walk the dogs/do yardwork, etc. and then go on your date.
11. Talk about your medical/hygiene issues--like foot odor, b.o., constipation, etc.
12. If you actually make it to a kiss, make it a wet and sloppy one--be aggressive--shove your tongue down their throat.
13. Suggest in a not-so-subtle way after the date that you expect them to 'put-out' especially if you have paid.
14. Curse
15. Talk about hot-button issues--abortion, religion, etc. Disagree
with whatever they might say--disagree in a disagreeable way...
I would say that meeting some of your GUY friends accidentally while out on a date would do it.
Tell the girl you are not used to talking on a date, you are used to doing other things.
Tell them that the reason a camera is set up is because you hired two prostitutes to have a threesome
but they were too fat, you just never got around to taking down the camera
Show them the dead frozen baby rattle snakes you keep in your freezer
Show up in clothes that are wrinkled with unkept hair and flip flops
Tell them that you think all woman are beautiful evan very young girls.
Tell them for no reason at all that you are not gay
Tell them that you wrote an obituary for your ex after you broke up with them
Tell them that your ex wife was trying to kill you and that you still stay in contact with them
and my Mom wandered why I did not get married untill i was 32, she has no Idea what is out there.
Some of the things were what woman told my Husband and some were told to me by guys.
Maybe we were just bad dates, oh well we found eachother so thats what counts
Thought this might be a fun thread...here's my list:
1.
Introduce him to your whole family. Make sure that you give your family
a heads up that they should be overly affectionate, hug, and say
"Welcome to the family!"
1a. Tell them about how much you've always loved them. Propose.
2. Talk about your ticking biological clock. Ask if he/she wants a large family
3. Talk about marriage
4. Talk about your ex--ad nauseaum. Talk in extremes--either how much you loved them/hated them. DO NOT be neutral.
5. Talk about your sex life/lack thereof
6. If you had offered to pay for dinner--come up short on the bill--accuse them of ordering/eating too much.
7. If you offered to pay--shoot them a look and tell them not to order
the most expensive thing on the menu. When they order, cut them off and
tell them that it's too much.
8. Drink too much. Get sloppy drunk.
9. Show up for your date already high, drunk, etc.
10. Don't shower/bathe before your date. In fact, go to the gym and walk the dogs/do yardwork, etc. and then go on your date.
11. Talk about your medical/hygiene issues--like foot odor, b.o., constipation, etc.
12. If you actually make it to a kiss, make it a wet and sloppy one--be aggressive--shove your tongue down their throat.
13. Suggest in a not-so-subtle way after the date that you expect them to 'put-out' especially if you have paid.
14. Curse
15. Talk about hot-button issues--abortion, religion, etc. Disagree
with whatever they might say--disagree in a disagreeable way...
"Disagree in a disagreeable way," LOL.
Quote:
Originally Posted by smel
I remember a date with a guy that kissed like a vacuum cleaner...I had to fight to get my tongue back...he sucked it in and tried to keep it...ugh...last date.
LMAO
Tell them you'd like to go home and be on City-Data all night long.
One time, me and this woman met at the restaurant. It was a first date. We agreed to go get drinks...but she insisted on me giving her my address in case "we got lost." I thought it was weird, but I did it.
Things didn't work out. But she would send texts ALL THE TIME how I just HAD TO GIVE her another chance. I really didn't think I had to and I would tell her that.
Anyway one morning I got up to go to work and there was something on my windshield. A note on how much I meant to her and she couldn't get over it. I told her that was crazy and if she does it again I'll call the cops. Hadn't really heard from her since....
...until this morning. "So you really never want to talk to me again?" Yikes. She has hung onto my number for like 8 months.
You meet the strangest characters..maybe you and me both...for a while there I couldn't keep those who wern't straight out of the federal pen(no joke) off my trail.
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