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YOU have the real problem because you think he is "smoking hot" and you KNOW he is married!! None of us care what your body tells you, just don't be stupid!! But, then again, you KEEP telling everyone just how "hot" this dude is and how "hot" he makes you feel inside........most likely you WON'T leave him alone and end up doing what is totally wrong. Lady, only one thing to say to YOU.........listen to your ADULT mind, NOT what your body is telling you!! Or, as my dear old pappy use to tell me "son, think with your brain not your zipper!"
How would you describe sexual tension? How do you know when if it's mutual or just one sided?
I'm having a terrible time at work. I am very very attracted to my supervisor. We have these moments where it's just unbearable. I just want to jump him. I'm fairly certain it's mutual. I catch him looking at me all the time and sometimes when our eyes meet... wow. It's so tense. I try to avoid him and he does the same, but we just keep being pulled together. It's like there's a magnet working between us.
We didn't used to have this problem. He was always very flirty, but I didn't think anything of it. Then, one day we shared this weird moment where we made eye contact and neither of us looked away and every since then, it just keeps happening more often and is more tense.
What can I do to diffuse this? On top of being my supervisor, he's married. It's just a hot mess. The more I try to avoid interacting with him, the more tense it gets.
OP - You need to take your job seriously if you want to keep your job You should be mature and behave like a decent adult. These type of behaviour is not acceptable at work, period!!!
Just think the consequences that would happen to you and your boss
sara you need to step back for a minute. most of why you are so hot for him is because you are having a fantasy relationship with him in your brain about being with him. of course a relationship you have in your mind is perfect, the sex is hot and you both are mad for one another. in reality he is a married tease, that has so little regard for his marriage that he will flirt with other women. men like that are selfish, selfish men make for terrible lovers. give yourself time to get over the attraction, start looking at him for what he is not who you wish he was. he maybe hot but so are lots of men you won't ever be with. he is a handsome player, playing for the benefit of his own ego. move on
You're boss and married? Add kids and you're shooting for the homewrecker tri-fecta.
Um, don't drink before going to work and seeing him? Alcohol has never been known for shoring up the sexual defenses.
And while my brain basically controls my body, I'm TRYING to see things from your point of view.
Perhaps it is because it is forbidden (and it is), that you feel this draw? If he's flirting with you and married, he's not a great guy. Just tell yourself that he probably has a small one, and it would only last five minutes.... instead of all the other stuff you're obviously telling yourself that maintains your arousal.
Wouldn't talking about it just make it worse because then we admit to what we are feeling? This way, we only speculate that the other is feeling the same. We talk and he teases me sometimes, but we never talk about that. I am usually the one to break eye contact during those moments.
I am not going to "pull him into the restroom and get it over with". He's married. Sheeesh. But, I can't help how attracted I am to him. Oh my god. I can feel when he is close. I'm aware of my every move when he is near. I feel so awkward. I hate this.
Yes you can help being attracted to him. If the year in your username is indicative of your birth date, you're a 32 year old woman. Act like it.
Next time your supervisor makes inappropriate "eyes" at you, or makes a flirtatious comment, that's the time to pull him aside and say, "You're making me uncomfortable. I'm coming to you first so that you have an opportunity to correct the problem yourself. But if I continue to feel the kind of tension and discomfort I have been when you're around me, I'll have no choice but to report the hostile workplace conditions to Human Resources."
He's a grown, married man in a position of authority. He's taking advantage of both his position of seniority and your probably obvious positive response to his flirtations. He's not only scum, but he's violating the law.
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You should be mature and behave like a decent adult. These type of behaviour is not acceptable at work, period!!!
give yourself time to get over the attraction, start looking at him for what he is not who you wish he was. he maybe hot but so are lots of men you won't ever be with. he is a handsome player, playing for the benefit of his own ego. move on
