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I have to agree with most of the gals advice already given, that you do not buy a house together. No ands, no ifs, no buts! No unmaried couple should ever do this. One person should buy the home and the other can pay rent if that is what the two agree on. Save money and forget having a lawyer draw up anything. What one lawyer comes up with, there is a million others that are happy to contest it.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CaliTerp07
I think you're absolutely crazy for wanting to buy a house with someone who you aren't married to and who doesn't have the same financial priorities as you.
Guess I will be living at home then until I make enough money to afford the place I want on my own. Thanks for the advice. Pretty depressing that I have to be married to live my life and reap the rewards of tax breaks, housing benefits etc. Guess that's why the divorce rates so high. Don't want to be a statistic.
I have to be married to live my life and reap the rewards of tax breaks, housing benefits etc. Guess that's why the divorce rates so high. Don't want to be a statistic
I'm not saying, get married. I'm saying be smart about your decisions.
Live with him. It's your life and do what you want.
I said, buy this house without help. You don't need a man to help buy a home. If, this is your dream and desire, don't wait for him. Don't complain about his money choices.
Guess I will be living at home then until I make enough money to afford the place I want on my own. Thanks for the advice. Pretty depressing that I have to be married to live my life and reap the rewards of tax breaks, housing benefits etc. Guess that's why the divorce rates so high. Don't want to be a statistic.
The "tax break" is over-rated. I'll tell you what, send me a dollar, and I'll give you back twenty-five cents. How do you like your "tax-break"? The only real housing benefit is it's your place eventually when you pay off the mortgage, but associated with that will be the property upkeep, property taxes, utility bills and other assorted "headaches". As for a marriage tax break - Ha! I got married, bought a house and had a child - my taxes went UP!! What tax-break? It's more like a marriage and kid penalty.
The "tax break" is over-rated. I'll tell you what, send me a dollar, and I'll give you back twenty-five cents. How do you like your "tax-break"? The only real housing benefit is it's your place eventually when you pay off the mortgage, but associated with that will be the property upkeep, property taxes, utility bills and other assorted "headaches". As for a marriage tax break - Ha! I got married, bought a house and had a child - my taxes went UP!! What tax-break? It's more like a marriage and kid penalty.
Guess I will be living at home then until I make enough money to afford the place I want on my own. Thanks for the advice. Pretty depressing that I have to be married to live my life and reap the rewards of tax breaks, housing benefits etc. Guess that's why the divorce rates so high. Don't want to be a statistic.
Who says you have to live at home? Many people here have suggested that your BF pay for half of the mortgage. He doesn't have to have partial ownership of the house to do that.
And why should you reap the benefits of a marriage if you're not willing to be in one? Giving these type benefits to any couple will slide us down a very slippery slope.
This was more in response to fatmancomics. Just dont understand why moving in=marriage and just needed to clarify.
Sorry, didn't mean to assume. But you have to admit that just because you don't have a wedding it doesn't mean that you are not part of a marriage. That's probably why you're considered part of a common law marriage in California (I live in L.A.) after five years of living in the same place.
That's also something to keep in mind if you're going to move in together. Other posters have suggested that you buy the house under your name and charge him rent. I'd take it a step further and draw up a lease agreement so that he is legaly your tenant and he can't claim any ownership of the house or that his rent was going towards ownership of the house when you guys break up. Trust me, you WILL break up and it might be over his obsession with the cars or over this house. I'd put money on it being over the house since he obviously doesn't care about it as much as you do.
Or you could just do the REAL smart thing and buy the house on your own and let him fend for himself when it comes to where he's going to live. It doesn't mean you have to break up. It just means that you won't live together.
Look, in the end, marriage, whether it's legal or not, is a partnership and partners usually share the responsibility of their endeavor. This house was supposed to be you and your boyfriend's endeavor and he already failed to do his part before you guys even started the endeavor.
If this were a business that you guys were getting into, you would have to either get a new partner or find a way to do it by yourself. The dumbest thing you could do is put up all the capital yourself and allow someone else to be a partner without investing anything.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Childfree35
No, you never mentioned marrying this guy, but this could be a mistake. I have several friends bought homes and broke up. Now, it's the nasty business of buying someone out or someone moving out.
Buy this home with your money and you can afford. It sounds like your bf may come up short sometimes. The bf is your equal partner, but you won't have any problems in the future.
It sounds like his priorities are different from yours. Take care of YOU. We woman sit and try to grow a man up. You know what you have. Let him be him. He's not going to save enough to contribute to the house. Something will always come up regarding the cars.
My cousin bought a house with the plan to move in her boyfriend and have him own the house along with her. She put the downpayment with the money that she made from the sale of her first home which she and my parents bought. She allowed the sour experience she had from co-owning a house with my parents (too many details in that story to go into here) to cloud her mind and make this deal with her boyfriend. Thinking that he was serious, she didn't find a house that she could afford by herself but instead paid five times as much as before for a house half as big.
The guy didn't move in and she went back to my parents for help. A few years later, after having more bad experinces and buying out my brother (because he claimed that the rent he was paying was going towards ownership of the house), she finally convinced her boyfriend to move in but he only did so because he and his brother lost his apartment so now she lives there with him AND his brother and has to put up with his children from another woman (also another story too long to tell) every other weekend.
Just something to think about before you make any rash decisions.
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