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Just curious, how many of you have had purely sexual relationships in the past?
Me ...
Any women that were able to maintain this without getting emotionally involved?
Past we were friends and now still are, the current one we are friends and hope that we will continue to be. If not I have no problem with that.
The kind of relationship that is understood by both parties that it is ONLY sexual and there are no strings attached.
I don't want strings attached, personally I think men are to much work.
Moreover, did you know that the other person was sleeping with others but you were able to "deal" with that?
Past yes, used protection. Current one only has one other and we use protection.
How long did it last?
Past - 4 yrs. Current - ongoing at 3 months now.
How did it start?
Both friends
Do you still think about this person?
Past one yes and we are friends and still talk at least once a week.
Was it hard to keep it sexual and did you feel yourself falling for this person?
Feelings of friendship and caring for a person, of course. Not the feeling of love and I can't live without you. I can live without them, I do and I always will.
Never. How could I do that? Having no feelings for a guy doesn't make me want to touch his body or have him touch mine. And I think people who say they can are kidding themselves or just naturally skanky.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Childfree35
Ladies, you knew this point of view would come. Wait for the pruddish men to chime in.
I don't wait for prudish men - I have no use for them - or for the holier than thou women.
So, I'm a skank - that's just a minority opinion because most people find me a very worthwhile friend, fun to be around, compassionate and giving, intelligent, helpful, and an all around nice person - oh, and sexy as hell mentally - even at 61.
As a teen, I had 3 sex-only friendships. One died in an accident, one's wife wouldn't have accepted my friendship with him or her, and the third who is now divorced (had nothing to do with me) is still my friend - as is his wife. We are all 3 friends. I thought it was FANTASTIC when they started dating. She is a wonderful woman and he's a doo-doo head for not making the marriage work. But that's not my business. I stayed out of it - we were simply friends without any benies by that time.
We were initially friends from around 9 yrs old - my friends and I grew up together and our sexual relationships began around age 12/13. It just happened - we all knew about each other and we all knew each other were dating others. We were friends. I met their girlfriends, they met my boyfriends. We didn't interfere. We gave each other room to have other friendships, regardless what road those friendships took - sexual, monogamous, just friends.
At no point did I ever have romantic thoughts towards any of them - nor they of me. Having sex was simply being a good friend. They satisfied a need in me and, like all teen boys, no one could satisfy their desire but their itch got scratched. We had the kind of relationship where I could call any one of them and they could call me. If we were free, we could get together and take care of what itched.
<shrug> I don't see what the big deal is. BTW, this was long before AIDS and our biggest concern was pregnancy.
I haven't. I never deemed it worth the time and effort.
A. Dress up; spruce up; travel to someone else's house or straighten up my own; go out and buy birth control; put effort into satisfying someone else; worry about germs, from STDs all the way down to the common cold; freak out if period was a week late, thinking maybe the birth control failed.
Aaaaaand, there's the requisite judgmental comments. FYI different people are capable of having different types of relationships other than your boringly typical vanilla christian missionary position only sex.
It doesn't make them "skanky" just because they don't subscribe to your mindset on the matter. As long as everyone is consenting, everyone is an adult, and everyone has safe sex, it doesn't matter. Sex is good for a person's mental health, and it's fun, and a person can think that way without being overly promiscuous or having unsafe sex.
LOL. I'm not christian or vanilla, interesting how you jump to that conclusion though. When exactly did being a w h 0 r e become admirable?
Just curious, how many of you have had purely sexual relationships in the past? Any women that were able to maintain this without getting emotionally involved? The kind of relationship that is understood by both parties that it is ONLY sexual and there are no strings attached. Moreover, did you know that the other person was sleeping with others but you were able to "deal" with that?
How long did it last?
How did it start?
Do you still think about this person?
Was it hard to keep it sexual and did you feel yourself falling for this person?
**Please, no married people that are currently having sexual relationships with other people. - This is not that kind of thread.**
I currently have 2 going on. One is purely sexual and has been going on for almost 5 years. We don't see each other that much, used to be twice a month, now every few months as he moved about 2 hours away. I started as an Internet date, but it was clear that neither of us wanted to be in a relationship. We have become good friends and support each other through the hard times but we happen to also be extremely sexually compatible so we always look forward to spending the night together.
No it has not been hard to keep it sexual/friendly. We have never developed romantic feelings for each other, we are such different people from different backgrounds.
The other fellow is someone I have known for about 25 years. We have always been friends but after my divorce we became sexually involved and it has been great. He lives in another state but we see each other whenever we can and often vacation together.
I do have stronger feelings for him than I do the other guy, but that is mostly due to our shared history. I love spending time with him but if we were in a relationship it would be disasterous. Again, our expectations and goals are very different and we would drive each other nuts. So, no falling in love there either.
Neither guy has ever been married or seems to ever want to. Both in their 40s--as am I
Oh, I forgot there was another one, another old friend I have known since I was in kindergarten. But he only blows through town about once a year, and if he is not dating anyone we go for it. If he is, we still have fun doing wholesome stuff.
LOL. I'm not christian or vanilla, interesting how you jump to that conclusion though. When exactly did being a w h 0 r e become admirable?
Your opinion on how you feel about it is your opinion and I respect that. You know the saying .... Opinions are like a**holes, everyone has one.
I'm 50 and have a great income, been married and have 3 adult children. My life is mine and I live it the way I want, just like you live yours the way you want. To each their own, and whatever floats your boat. I know what works for me and what floats my boat ..
And btw ... I don't have to get dressed up and go anywhere ... they come to me if they want to see me go out or just stay in. Oh... and the current one is a great cook, as I don't cook.
Last edited by MagicTouch; 08-21-2010 at 02:27 PM..
They can be a lot fun. But I have found they have a down side . Some times those people can be available to you long term, no strings , no questions asked. When you are married or in a committed relationship there are obvious normal ups and downs. when you always have some one to run to even if its just to get a little emotional release it will make your commitment to some one conditional (if that makes any sense?)
So, I'm a skank - that's just a minority opinion because most people find me a very worthwhile friend, fun to be around, compassionate and giving, intelligent, helpful, and an all around nice person - oh, and sexy as hell mentally - even at 61.
NYA, I'd bet it's more then just mentally.
We have a girlfriend who has always used the line "I may be a *Sl**, but I'm not trash"
She has a PHD so I assumed she must be the expert. To me that always put it in perspective.
LOL. I'm not christian or vanilla, interesting how you jump to that conclusion though. When exactly did being a w h 0 r e become admirable?
Being capable of having a FWB relationship without it being an in-love romantic thing does not make one a wh*re, despite your prudish personal opinion. And whether you're christian or not, you're certainly vanilla if that's how you view things, and you certainly subscribe to many of the same narrow opinions that those of the christian ilk do.
the 3 great lies
i dont wana get married
sex yes with no strings attached
i dont wana have children
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