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When the weather is good, I like to go jogging outside in a neighborhood/downtown-ish area. Let me make this clear: NOTHING about me is asking for attention. My hair is in a ponytail. I'm wearing no makeup unless I put some on earlier in the day. I'm sweaty. And I'm wearing a t-shirt with jogging/running capris. Sure, you can see my shape a little bit, but it's not like I'm wearing a sports bra with tiny shorts. I'm focused on running and don't particularly make inviting facial expressions (like warm smiles lol).
However, invariably, the men I pass or that pass me will make comments that make me cringe and want to run away. Today this guy passed me on a bicycle and said stuff about how sexy I was and then kept looking back at me every few seconds like I was a walking filet. These guys on a balcony yelled stuff at me until I was out of their sight. And I get men who make those noises when you pass... the noises men make when they come across a good piece of steak.
Sure, I suppose this is flattering in a way, but I don't want this type of attention and it quite honestly creeps me out. When I want the attention, then I'll style myself and when I get attention from the hot men and the creepers alike, I can't complain. But in this scenario, I'm NOT looking for it. I just want to work out and that's it. It makes me feel vulnerable because I'm young and I don't know how to respond to it. I've invested and continue to invest a lot of hard work and energy into becoming fit and having a toned body, but it seems like my results (especially my butt - to be frank) invites unwanted attention.
W It makes me feel vulnerable because I'm young and I don't know how to respond to it.
Ignore it, or laugh it off, or say thank you and keep going. I mean, what's the issue? You're being paid a compliment. Unless they're following you and harrassing you, what's the big deal?
Sure, I suppose this is flattering in a way, but I don't want this type of attention and it quite honestly creeps me out. When I want the attention, then I'll style myself and when I get attention from the hot men and the creepers alike, I can't complain. But in this scenario, I'm NOT looking for it. I just want to work out and that's it. It makes me feel vulnerable because I'm young and I don't know how to respond to it. I've invested and continue to invest a lot of hard work and energy into becoming fit and having a toned body, but it seems like my results (especially my butt - to be frank) invites unwanted attention.
The best cure for this is time. Obviously you can't control other peoples' behavior, so just wait it out. I got a lot of that until I was around 23 or so and then it quit, though once when I was 49 I got honked at and just had a good laugh at it b/c it had been so long and I wondered if they needed new glasses.
When the weather is good, I like to go jogging outside in a neighborhood/downtown-ish area. Let me make this clear: NOTHING about me is asking for attention. My hair is in a ponytail. I'm wearing no makeup unless I put some on earlier in the day. I'm sweaty. And I'm wearing a t-shirt with jogging/running capris. Sure, you can see my shape a little bit, but it's not like I'm wearing a sports bra with tiny shorts. I'm focused on running and don't particularly make inviting facial expressions (like warm smiles lol).
However, invariably, the men I pass or that pass me will make comments that make me cringe and want to run away. Today this guy passed me on a bicycle and said stuff about how sexy I was and then kept looking back at me every few seconds like I was a walking filet. These guys on a balcony yelled stuff at me until I was out of their sight. And I get men who make those noises when you pass... the noises men make when they come across a good piece of steak.
Sure, I suppose this is flattering in a way, but I don't want this type of attention and it quite honestly creeps me out. When I want the attention, then I'll style myself and when I get attention from the hot men and the creepers alike, I can't complain. But in this scenario, I'm NOT looking for it. I just want to work out and that's it. It makes me feel vulnerable because I'm young and I don't know how to respond to it. I've invested and continue to invest a lot of hard work and energy into becoming fit and having a toned body, but it seems like my results (especially my butt - to be frank) invites unwanted attention.
Next time you go by, turn the tables on those boys and make some of your own cat calls. Often believe it or not boys get quite embarrassed when women display some aggressiveness . And dear you are a female, you need wear no makeup and men will find you sexy. We women wear that stuff primarily for ourselves, because men really don't care at all.
Ignore it, or laugh it off, or say thank you and keep going. I mean, what's the issue? You're being paid a compliment. Unless they're following you and harrassing you, what's the big deal?
It's a big deal because I don't appreciate that type of attention... and it is NOT a compliment. It IS borderline harassment when they make unwanted comments about various body parts.
It's a big deal because I don't appreciate that type of attention... and it is NOT a compliment. It IS borderline harassment when they make unwanted comments about various body parts.
You live in a world with other people however and some of those people are just plain crass. I have no problems with catcalls and sometimes make some of my own, but i do think you are taking this a bit too personal as well.
We women wear that stuff primarily for ourselves, because men really don't care at all.
Truth. It's why women get unwanted attention at the gym. Y'all are like "oh but we look all sweaty and tired and terrible"... doesn't register that way to us
Anyway, you can either ignore them or maybe check out this website
You live in a world with other people however and some of those people are just plain crass. I have no problems with catcalls and sometimes make some of my own, but i do think you are taking this a bit too personal as well.
You should really rethink your argument. You're arguing that we live in a world with different people and because they want to do what they want to do, we should just accept it. So, if mango walks by a guy and he touches her - she should just accept it because he's a pervert and that's what he does? Oh, and not take it personally because boys will be boys, right?
You're excusing behavior that is highly inappropriate and it really speaks to your disturbed mindset that you think mango is in the wrong for not liking it. But I do suppose you excuse poor behavior because you exhibit it yourself.
Mango, you are absolutely right to feel uncomfortable. Unwanted attention is NOT ok. I have found the best thing to do is turn the music up and walk right past the problem. Reacting is what they want - unfortunately there is not much more you can do besides that.
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How to respond to cat calls?
. And dear you are a female, you need wear no makeup and men will find you sexy. We women wear that stuff primarily for ourselves, because men really don't care at all.