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I stopped making dinner for my boyfriend..Here is why.
I usually invite him over to my house for dinner usually 3 or 4 nights a week.
My household bills went up an extra $200.00 a month. Im paying student loans now. His income is more than mine. I bring my own lunch I cant afford to go out to eat for lunch. He goes out to eat everyday.
He recently recieved $2000.00. Ive been taking him to work for the last couple of days his SUV will be ready Friday. Do you think he said here is some money to buy yourself lunch..HELL N0...he knows I cant afford to buy lunch... So NO more DINNERS for him...
Wow, I completely disagree with the other responses. It sounds to me like you don't even love him & are jealous that he's in a better financial situation.
You said that you invite him over to your house for dinner 3-4 times a week. When I invite someone over for dinner I would not ever expect to be compensated for the expense of the meal.
If you had said your boyfriend comes over all the time uninvited & is eating up all of your food in the refrigerator faster than you can afford to buy it & that consequently your bills have gone up an extra $200.00 a month that would be totally different, but that's not what you said.
Lastly, why should your boyfriend give you money to go out to lunch just because you can't afford to?
Are you saying that because you brought him to work for a few days while his car was in the shop? Yes, it would have been generous of him to offer to compensate you in some way for your trouble but for you to expect something from him when he was in a pinch just seems downright tacky.
If he asks why you've stopped inviting him over for dinner I would just be honest & let him know that even though you enjoy having him over you can no longer afford the extra groceries.
Wow, I completely disagree with the other responses. It sounds to me like you don't even love him & are jealous that he's in a better financial situation.
You said that you invite him over to your house for dinner 3-4 times a week. When I invite someone over for dinner I would not ever expect to be compensated for the expense of the meal.
If you had said your boyfriend comes over all the time uninvited & is eating up all of your food in the refrigerator faster than you can afford to buy it & that consequently your bills have gone up an extra $200.00 a month that would be totally different, but that's not what you said.
Lastly, why should your boyfriend give you money to go out to lunch just because you can't afford to?
Are you saying that because you brought him to work for a few days while his car was in the shop? Yes, it would have been generous of him to offer to compensate you in some way for your trouble but for you to expect something from him when he was in a pinch just seems downright tacky.
If he asks why you've stopped inviting him over for dinner I would just be honest & let him know that even though you enjoy having him over you can no longer afford the extra groceries.
Courtney
You need to take into account what he's doing for her. So far the story is one sided. We hear what she's doing for him. Now let her tell us what he does for her. If he's not taking her out, then he's taking advantage of her.
If I were that guy, I'd be taking her out or cooking dinner for her in return.
This has nothing to do with jealousy of who makes more. She's obviously spending more money on dinner (making dinner for two is more than making dinner for one), and its wearing on her finances.
My advice to the OP is tell us what he's doing for you so we can get a fair assessment of the situation.
Wow, I completely disagree with the other responses. It sounds to me like you don't even love him & are jealous that he's in a better financial situation.
You said that you invite him over to your house for dinner 3-4 times a week. When I invite someone over for dinner I would not ever expect to be compensated for the expense of the meal.
If you had said your boyfriend comes over all the time uninvited & is eating up all of your food in the refrigerator faster than you can afford to buy it & that consequently your bills have gone up an extra $200.00 a month that would be totally different, but that's not what you said.
Lastly, why should your boyfriend give you money to go out to lunch because you can't afford to?
Are you saying that because you brought him to work for a few days while his car was in the shop? Yes, it would have been generous of him to offer to compensate you in some way for your trouble but for you to expect something from him when he was in a pinch just seems downright tacky.
If he asks why you've stopped inviting him over for dinner I would just be honest & let him know that even though you enjoy having him over you can no longer afford the extra groceries.
Courtney
What a nutty post. Her boyfriend isn't a "guest" in her home, they're in a relationship and in a relationship you expect a degree of reciprocity.
The OP doesn't sound like she expects her BF to support her, she sounds like she expects him to understand she's in a financial bind and expects him to be a little bit more considerate. Which is only natural.
You're accusing her of being "downriught tacky" for expecting compensation for being his chauffeur when his car was in the shop (which btw, wasn't her responsibility, no more than it is to feed him), so why shouldn't she expect some compensation for being his personal driver AND short-order personal chef? In a relationship, everything shouldn't be an outright negotiation but some level of unspoken understanding for each other's sacrifices is expected on both parties.
I stopped making dinner for my boyfriend..Here is why.
I usually invite him over to my house for dinner usually 3 or 4 nights a week.
My household bills went up an extra $200.00 a month. Im paying student loans now. His income is more than mine. I bring my own lunch I cant afford to go out to eat for lunch. He goes out to eat everyday.
He recently recieved $2000.00. Ive been taking him to work for the last couple of days his SUV will be ready Friday. Do you think he said here is some money to buy yourself lunch..HELL N0...he knows I cant afford to buy lunch... So NO more DINNERS for him...
Jeepgirl, does your boyfriend know about your financial situation? Or do you carry yourself as though everything is flush and you're not really struggling?
I'll admit he sounds selfish on the surface of your thread, but if you've been spoiling him all this time and then you suddenly stop without offering up an explanation, this could cause some further confusion and set back communication between the two of you. Is it in your nature to just cook for anyone, or is that something you reserve for someone special? If it's the latter, what was it that made him so special in the first place that you wanted to cook for him so often at your own expense?
If I had a girlfriend (and that's a very big if) and she was asking me over to dinner all the time I would feel the need to at least pay for the groceries. It sounds like this guy is just sponging off of her and isn't very considerate at all. I would agree with others who have suggested maybe it's time to dump this guy and find someone like me.
Jeepgirl, does your boyfriend know about your financial situation? Or do you carry yourself as though everything is flush and you're not really struggling?
I'll admit he sounds selfish on the surface of your thread, but if you've been spoiling him all this time and then you suddenly stop without offering up an explanation, this could cause some further confusion and set back communication between the two of you. Is it in your nature to just cook for anyone, or is that something you reserve for someone special? If it's the latter, what was it that made him so special in the first place that you wanted to cook for him so often at your own expense?
He knows I manage my money. I like to cook. He wasnt always like this, he just started being this way. Maybe because I wont go to his house anymore for dinner. His daughter has 2 cats now and they walk on everything the counter the tables and thats just gross. But he knows why I wont go over there anymore. There is no excuse for him acting this way. When I stop doing something for him he usually will say what is wrong and I have no problem telling him. He knows I dont foolishly spend my money.
So no more dinners. I will enjoy them myself
Jeepgirl, does your boyfriend know about your financial situation? Or do you carry yourself as though everything is flush and you're not really struggling?
I'll admit he sounds selfish on the surface of your thread, but if you've been spoiling him all this time and then you suddenly stop without offering up an explanation, this could cause some further confusion and set back communication between the two of you. Is it in your nature to just cook for anyone, or is that something you reserve for someone special? If it's the latter, what was it that made him so special in the first place that you wanted to cook for him so often at your own expense?
I agree....if he doesn't realize you're struggling he may not realize the dinners are becoming a burden. BUT if he does realize then booooo.... thats horrible.
Try exlax in next weeks meal!
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