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That's why I've made steps to insure that I don't have a the life of poverty I had as a child but I live in a huge 4 bedroom, 3 bathroom house but none of it is my own because I got a little complacent and spend-happy because I saw my life change very quickly and I thought it'd always be like this. Of course it doesn't help I have major school debt and things, but I'm working on saving money so I have things of my own, which never was really important to me until now.
I'm talking about deliberate disregard of such, i.e., never exercising, or eating unhealthy foods that contribute to obesity (of course, I look for things I like in myself, I've been a vegetarian for years and more recently I've transitioned to a low fat, low calorie diet). He is very physically fit and works out for 2-3 hours a day, and his body looks like it. Of course when I see his hands shake I get very sad, because he looks like someone who is in excellent health and it is certainly fitter than I am.
If you don't think substance abuse is "deliberate disregard" of fitness, then I really don't know what to say.
Yes, he appears healthy. "Appears" being the operative word.
You will get very sad for worse than shaky hands, if he keeps it up. "Roid rage", aggression, heart attack and death are all very sad results of steroid abuse. Just a few examples.
You seem to be in denial about how bad his situation really is, and how it will impact your future. I hope you find some clarity on the situation soon.
If you don't think substance abuse is "deliberate disregard" of fitness, then I really don't know what to say.
Yes, he appears healthy. "Appears" being the operative word.
You will get very sad for worse than shaky hands, if he keeps it up. "Roid rage", aggression, heart attack and death are all very sad results of steroid abuse. Just a few examples.
You seem to be in denial about how bad his situation really is, and how it will impact your future. I hope you find some clarity on the situation soon.
Yeah, and your boys shrivel too.
Last edited by Chowhound; 09-25-2010 at 03:16 PM..
Reason: foul and/or filthy language.
I've seen the physical side effects and they don't bother me so much as the behaviors. The shaky hands are on consequence of alcohol withdrawal and he admits it.
Don't make a relationship with him. I speak from experience and it will take you down paths you never ever thought you would go and just when you thought it couldn't get worse it will get worse. Even if they get sober which is a gift, I always wonder if the demon will come back to haunt and kill me.
I have just read more and more justifications and specious excuses. Why even bother to ask people's opinions or advice when you are just going to continue excusing his behaviour?
I see so much of myself in him it's not even funny. He will call me drunk, say ridiculous things and then say, "Now you're not going to want to speak to me again, or want anything to do with me."
Maybe it's because he wants to test me as another poster said, or his fear of abandonment is as great as mine's, whcih only leads me to sympathize with him more.
I have just read more and more justifications and specious excuses. Why even bother to ask people's opinions or advice when you are just going to continue excusing his behaviour?
The thing is i don't. I decided to break it off with him the first time and I'll likely be the first person to break it off again, it's just that it's not easy and I really would rather not.
OK, I'll assume you are real and your post is real. I'm always skeptical of internet forum posters (Can anyone spell Misswee?).
If you're real, it's obvious you're a golddigger. You are a self-proclaimed 24 year unskilled waitress. How can such a person stay at homes in the Hamptons unless they latch onto a rich man? In order to have access to the good life, you have to put up with his personality deficiencies. Would you put up with such deficiencies if he were a 24 year old WAITER from the Bronx? Of course you wouldn't. There would be no payoff.
Everybody's telling you ditch this guy, he's trouble, bad news, etc.
Now I'll tell you what you really want to hear. Play him for all he's worth. Who knows? One of these days, he may be so whacked out, he'll actually be stupid enough to marry you. Then, simply divorce him and take a good chunk of his money. Then, you'll have your own place in the Hamptons. I'm sure that's NEVER entered your mind huh?
I see so much of myself in him it's not even funny. He will call me drunk, say ridiculous things and then say, "Now you're not going to want to speak to me again, or want anything to do with me."
Maybe it's because he wants to test me as another poster said, or his fear of abandonment is as great as mine's, whcih only leads me to sympathize with him more.
Since you recognize that you have this fear of abandonment, wouldn't working on changing that in yourself be a better step than spending time with someone who feeds that fear, or who recognizes that this is a button he can push that works on you?
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