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I do think men should follow the woman's lead in this instance. She will find a way to let you know, if she enjoys this kind of thing. Most women don't until they get to know a guy, and even then there is a way to hint and talk about it without being crass.
Women call it "confidence" but basically what they are looking for is a guy who has options and therefore treats them with something approaching contempt. Then they are scared that their g/fs will give them a hard time if he slips through their fingers too easily. So they are the pushy one.
That was one thing I could not stand way back when I tried online dating. I ran across a lot of people who would bring that stuff up in their profiles, initial emails, or IMs. It was ridiculous, really. You haven't even met someone yet and you are talking about how you like "sensuous massage" and "long bubble baths."
I do think men should follow the woman's lead in this instance. She will find a way to let you know, if she enjoys this kind of thing. Most women don't until they get to know a guy, and even then there is a way to hint and talk about it without being crass.
I agree. It's the eternal dance. If the 'S' word is brought up by a guy and the woman responds positively--he might then think less of her and decide to find a more challenging woman. If the woman doesn't respond then some would say she has 'issues'.
Sex is a good thing and therefore care must be taken by both parties.
I do think men should follow the woman's lead in this instance. She will find a way to let you know, if she enjoys this kind of thing. Most women don't until they get to know a guy, and even then there is a way to hint and talk about it without being crass.
Exactly. A man who is paying attention will pick up on her signals and know when she's receptive and ready to move things forward. Men who are unable to "read" a woman, wouldn't be a good lover for her anyway, as it's this very ability that makes or breaks the whole experience for a woman. My two cents.
In other words, the very fact that he was unable (or ignored) my signals is an immediate indicator that he's not worth bothering with. I will swat him away like a fly.
how would we know where the boundaries were, if we didn't push them?
i like to take what i'm given, and run with it. i have learned that women who are interested will respond positively to innuendo and sex talk, and that the more reticent they are, the more i'm actually wasting my time in the first place.
if the person i'm talking to won't even hint at anything sexual, then that's a very good indicator that she's not attracted, just soaking up attention. there's nothing wrong with that, but it definitely changes the dynamic, in the sense that now she has to work if she wants to keep my interest, too.
I was just talking to a friend who went on a first date with a guy she met on a dating site over the weekend. Apparently during drinks he began waxing poetic about how much he enjoys performing oral sex out of nowhere, and my friend said she went from having a promising date to "OMG how soon can I get out of here?" real fast.
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