Do you cheat? (marriages, man, husband, older)

[007.5]

Originally Posted by SamuelBrock77

I'm a 27 year old male. I've cheated on girlfriends and I've had girlfriends cheat on me. It happens I guess. However, I could have sworn that this stuff was suppossed to stop once people got married. I see/hear a lot of husbands and wives who cheat on their spouses out of sheer bordem and because their sex life is dull. Does that make it ok?

Since I am not a married man and am currently single cheating is something that scares me. Within every relationship I have had I have certainly seen my partner as an important role in my life. However, when I walk into the public eye all I do is see cheating going on whether it is a broken wedding vow due to a drunk night or a fresh boyfriend who wants to get another piece of his ex before he commits to someone new.

It seems to me like cheating becomes more acceptable as we grow in age where a long time ago it was taken very seriously. It really does not seem this way anymore. If my spouse or girlfriend did cheat on me, breaking up would seem like the correct solution. However, i am not really 100% sure how most couples handle it. I am wondering when cheating got so accepted in our culture and why people seem to actually be putting up with it in an attempt to stay with someone who obviously does not love them.

It got so accepted in our society :

1. When God and his moral mandates for civil living were considered an affront to our 'freedom', fun, and entitlement.

2. When the Mass Media made it sound and look so titilizing and adventurous , over and over and over again.

3. When people stopped considering personal integrity and willingness to work on their relationship problems ... and by adopting a spirit of apathy so they could get a temporary fix from another set of genitilia.

4. When Narcissism started being viewed as a healthy quest because, afterall, theres no one more important than Self on the Throne of ones life.

5. When people were willing to suppress their knowledge of whats right from wrong to aid in doing whatever feels good to do at the time...and pretending that there is no ultimate moral accountability to which they shall answer to once this brief life is over .

6. When the very real threat of permanant and fatal STD's (currently 33 shared amongst over 40,000,000 adult Americans and growing) didnt seem to phase ones entitlement to satisfaction by the using of another for a mere copulation.

7. WHen the likes of sexual Perversionist and Bi-sexual Dr. Alfred Kinsey back in the 1950-60's gave license to casual sex thereby putting America on the fasttrack to vast sexual immorality and the many gross repercussions thereof ....including but not limited to : The sucking out of developing Americans while in the womb ,*4,000 per day , into a nearby sink due specifically to the Nations favorite pastime of Sexual Hedonism gone further wrong.

One must ask, Do I want to be part of the problem or part of the solution.

[thebobs]

Originally Posted by seeniorita

ha!!! You underestimate me bobster ......i know you have wondering eyeballs and set you up! That'll teach ya to keep your eyes front and center mr!!!! :d

I should have known.

[bebe24]

I live with my babies daddy...i have 1 girl and 1 boy .......Well i have 23 years old and I have cheated and Ive been cheated on....we seperated because i was in love with another man..then i saw that the man that i loved ...loved me but didnt want to be in a relashionship because he had gone out of a messy relation sooo we were just friends with benefits.....but i got unsure of what he really wanted...i called my babies daddy and we tried to work everything out...and we were fine until I saw the guy that i was dating when i was seperated from him...i couldnt stop looking and he couldnt stop looking at me...I am sooo streessedd i dont know i think i still love him or do I ?? I meann me and my babies daddy were perfect until i saw him....Noww i cant stop thinking about him and its driving me crazyy...What do you guys think?

[miyu]

Cheating is lame. People make up all sorts of excuse for it... like, "Oh he already didn't make me happy, so I cheated." Or, "I already made it known that I wasn't happy, so it was expected." Or, "I'm bipolar." Or, "I already told him I wasn't going to commit at the beginning of the relationship." Or, "Life is complex, things aren't so black and white." Or, "Stop being judgmental, I'm not going to let your moral code dictate what I do!"

I have heard all the lame excuses from chronic cheaters. All it boils down to is that somebody decides that want to have their cake and eat it too. They are afraid of being alone but they don't want to give up one person, so they try to straddle between two relationships. The end result is that none of it works out.

Cheater = cowardice / insecurity + greed / opportunism

Cheaters need to work on their self esteem.

[nighthouse66]

Originally Posted by SamuelBrock77

I'm a 27 year old male. I've cheated on girlfriends and I've had girlfriends cheat on me. It happens I guess. However, I could have sworn that this stuff was suppossed to stop once people got married. I see/hear a lot of husbands and wives who cheat on their spouses out of sheer bordem and because their sex life is dull. Does that make it ok?

Since I am not a married man and am currently single cheating is something that scares me. Within every relationship I have had I have certainly seen my partner as an important role in my life. However, when I walk into the public eye all I do is see cheating going on whether it is a broken wedding vow due to a drunk night or a fresh boyfriend who wants to get another piece of his ex before he commits to someone new.

It seems to me like cheating becomes more acceptable as we grow in age where a long time ago it was taken very seriously. It really does not seem this way anymore. If my spouse or girlfriend did cheat on me, breaking up would seem like the correct solution. However, i am not really 100% sure how most couples handle it. I am wondering when cheating got so accepted in our culture and why people seem to actually be putting up with it in an attempt to stay with someone who obviously does not love them.

the reason you see cheating everywhere is because you have done it yourself. simple. i don't think cheating is accepted in our "culture". i think maybe living with other people before marriage, having babies outside of marriage, etc., has naturally become more prevalent. but i don't think cheating was something that "never used to happen". i think people just kept it under better wraps.

i don't know very many people who are cheating right now. i think one couple i know has a problem staying together but they are both train wrecks anyway. it is definitely not "the norm" and again, if you spend your time painting the town red all you are gonna see is the red parts of town. do you get my meaning? maybe you ought to change your own ways before making sweeping statements. if i were stealing, i would think everyone is a thief. that's just the funny little trip that guilt can play on a person's mind. stop cheating. i have never ever cheated on anyone, tho i have been the "other party" once and as soon as i found out i broke it off that minute. who wants that on their conscience? funnily enough, i have only, in turn, been cheated on ONCE. tit for tat. fair enough.

[nighthouse66]

Originally Posted by bebe24

I live with my babies daddy...i have 1 girl and 1 boy .......Well i have 23 years old and I have cheated and Ive been cheated on....we seperated because i was in love with another man..then i saw that the man that i loved ...loved me but didnt want to be in a relashionship because he had gone out of a messy relation sooo we were just friends with benefits.....but i got unsure of what he really wanted...i called my babies daddy and we tried to work everything out...and we were fine until I saw the guy that i was dating when i was seperated from him...i couldnt stop looking and he couldnt stop looking at me...I am sooo streessedd i dont know i think i still love him or do I ?? I meann me and my babies daddy were perfect until i saw him....Noww i cant stop thinking about him and its driving me crazyy...What do you guys think?

i think you aren't grown up enough to even be asking the question. seriously. love is not something that comes and goes according to who walks in the door that week. it is based on respect. are you seriously saying you left your baby's father to be with another guy, who was with someone else, then you got together with him then he broke it off and then you stayed sleeping with him while being with your baby daddy? good lord woman. maybe what you need is to be celibate for a while and straighten your head out. this is like a tangled ball of twine and there is a CHILD INVOLVED. lord, lord.

[victorianpunk]

Yahh, I cheat...sometimes, when the right one isn't looking, I use my left hand

[jbub22]

Originally Posted by bebe24

I live with my babies daddy...i have 1 girl and 1 boy .......Well i have 23 years old and I have cheated and Ive been cheated on....we seperated because i was in love with another man..then i saw that the man that i loved ...loved me but didnt want to be in a relashionship because he had gone out of a messy relation sooo we were just friends with benefits.....but i got unsure of what he really wanted...i called my babies daddy and we tried to work everything out...and we were fine until I saw the guy that i was dating when i was seperated from him...i couldnt stop looking and he couldnt stop looking at me...I am sooo streessedd i dont know i think i still love him or do I ?? I meann me and my babies daddy were perfect until i saw him....Noww i cant stop thinking about him and its driving me crazyy...What do you guys think?

Is this a serious post? If so, I think you have a lot more to worry about.

[asitshouldbe]

It does seem that sex has become more casual, a return to the 70's? I have never cheated, not saying that I would never, I've always said that, but as I get older and My sex life is getting duller, I have entertained the idea. I was a young teen in the late 70's and into the early 80's, when sex was also like a "handshake" I miss those carefree, "hook up" days.

[Asexualgirl]

No I do not cheat