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Everywhere I go, it seems I'm the only single one and I'm only 24 (female). All my friends that I hang out with, are all in a couple so I wind up being the only single one among 5 couples every single time we hang out. At school, all the men who are old enough for me, have a ring on their finger. I really thought there would be more singles at school, but I guess I thought wrong, hmm. I work at a women's bathing suit store so single men don't walk in, they may possibly be around my mall (I work at a high end outdoor mall) but I have to stay in my store anyways so its not like I would meet them. As for my activities, I dance, so all the men there are gay or again straight and taken. All my friends SO's don't know anyone or if they do, they never bring their single friends around and I don't feel comfortable asking them to bring other singles so that I'm not the only one among a bunch of couples (I don't want to seem like I'm coming off like I'm lonely either). Whenever I am invited to parties, all the normal seeming men are married or taken and the last remaining single guys tend to be very bizarre personalities. Aside from all that, I don't have the time to participate in other things I would enjoy where I could potentially be in the company of other single men. I'm already spreading myself so thin as it is. I love playing volleyball, but I just don't have the time to join a league .
I have one single friend to hang out with and so how am I supposed to meet anyone when this is how my day to day life is? I'm terrified of online dating, mostly because it doesn't sound natural to me and people, I hear mis represent themselves big time. The only place a good amount of single men are lately, are in bars/clubs and that is absolutely not my thing. I can't help but feel a twinge of sadness when I'm day in day out, always the only single one, but yet everywhere I go, the remaining singles are too young for me or just incompatible to me for whatever reason (mostly not attractive to me or no chemistry, or an agenda I'm not interested in). I'm thisclose to giving up on the whole thing, but maybe there is something else I can do. I'm not desperate, otherwise I'd date any of the men who have approached me already. I feel like my luck simply lies in where I'm going, but well..where do I go when I always see married men everywhere (that are most likely around my age)? I clearly live a very full life so my happiness is obviously not at stake, but I would like to add one more element: a relationship, that's all.
Some of my friends have tried to set me up, but it was against my will, and it felt unnatural and forced. On top of that, it just proved how little my friends know about me, but that's another story.
Anywho..another "frustrated dater" post, lol..I'm seriously at a loss, so should I be even more patient, or just give up, or try something else? Its been almost 2 years since I've had a relationship and I feel ready to "fall in love" again.
Everywhere I go, it seems I'm the only single one and I'm only 24 (female). All my friends that I hang out with, are all in a couple so I wind up being the only single one among 5 couples every single time we hang out. At school, all the men who are old enough for me, have a ring on their finger. I really thought there would be more singles at school, but I guess I thought wrong, hmm. I work at a women's bathing suit store so single men don't walk in, they may possibly be around my mall (I work at a high end outdoor mall) but I have to stay in my store anyways so its not like I would meet them. As for my activities, I dance, so all the men there are gay or again straight and taken. All my friends SO's don't know anyone or if they do, they never bring their single friends around and I don't feel comfortable asking them to bring other singles so that I'm not the only one among a bunch of couples (I don't want to seem like I'm coming off like I'm lonely either). Whenever I am invited to parties, all the normal seeming men are married or taken and the last remaining single guys tend to be very bizarre personalities. Aside from all that, I don't have the time to participate in other things I would enjoy where I could potentially be in the company of other single men. I'm already spreading myself so thin as it is. I love playing volleyball, but I just don't have the time to join a league .
I have one single friend to hang out with and so how am I supposed to meet anyone when this is how my day to day life is? I'm terrified of online dating, mostly because it doesn't sound natural to me and people, I hear mis represent themselves big time. The only place a good amount of single men are lately, are in bars/clubs and that is absolutely not my thing. I can't help but feel a twinge of sadness when I'm day in day out, always the only single one, but yet everywhere I go, the remaining singles are too young for me or just incompatible to me for whatever reason (mostly not attractive to me or no chemistry, or an agenda I'm not interested in). I'm thisclose to giving up on the whole thing, but maybe there is something else I can do. I'm not desperate, otherwise I'd date any of the men who have approached me already. I feel like my luck simply lies in where I'm going, but well..where do I go when I always see married men everywhere (that are most likely around my age)? I clearly live a very full life so my happiness is obviously not at stake, but I would like to add one more element: a relationship, that's all.
Some of my friends have tried to set me up, but it was against my will, and it felt unnatural and forced. On top of that, it just proved how little my friends know about me, but that's another story.
Anywho..another "frustrated dater" post, lol..I'm seriously at a loss, so should I be even more patient, or just give up, or try something else? Its been almost 2 years since I've had a relationship and I feel ready to "fall in love" again.
Yes, it is weird that there is no single guys. Probably a mass epidemic killed them off and all that are left are Bar/club dwellers and homicidal killers. (the young will eventually grow up into being one of those types.)
I guess all you can do is to hope that somewhere a single man that escaped the epidemic and is not bizarre will appear. BTW what would be a suitable single guy in your estimation? If you do not know yet, you might have let him get away. Whats that, you think you are not responsible for your predicament? Think again.
Yes, it is weird that there is no single guys. Probably a mass epidemic killed them off and all that are left are Bar/club dwellers and homicidal killers. (the young will eventually grow up into being one of those types.)
I guess all you can do is to hope that somewhere a single man that escaped the epidemic and is not bizarre will appear. BTW what would be a suitable single guy in your estimation? If you do not know yet, you might have let him get away. Whats that, you think you are not responsible for your predicament? Think again.
I never said they were all killed off, just that I can't find the single ones and I'm asking for advice on how to find them. You sound like you get turned down a lot, hmm.
I'm not asking for a lot and I just know what I don't want: smoker, druggie, rude, drinks/parties too much, bad hygiene and doesn't take care of himself at all are things I won't tolerate. Everything else is up to chemistry and compatibility. I never said I'm not responsible for my predicament either. I don't know what I'm doing, I just know I'm doing something wrong, as for what, who knows?
I don't know why you bothered posting when you just spouted off accusations..but I should have expected that...have a nice day .
Sierra-that would also require me to look at half naked old men...not my thing! haha since I get women of all ages in my store, I would imagine men of all ages would shop there if it were a mens swimsuit store!
I don't know why you bothered posting when you just spouted off accusations..but I should have expected that...have a nice day .
It's Halloween. I could not resist a Horror story.
On a practical note: Your requirements sound reasonable but I suspect you place too much emphasis on "chemistry". That develops overtime with a good person. Any other forms are simply lust.
Everywhere I go, it seems I'm the only single one and I'm only 24 (female). All my friends that I hang out with, are all in a couple so I wind up being the only single one among 5 couples every single time we hang out. At school, all the men who are old enough for me, have a ring on their finger. I really thought there would be more singles at school, but I guess I thought wrong, hmm. I work at a women's bathing suit store so single men don't walk in, they may possibly be around my mall (I work at a high end outdoor mall) but I have to stay in my store anyways so its not like I would meet them. As for my activities, I dance, so all the men there are gay or again straight and taken. All my friends SO's don't know anyone or if they do, they never bring their single friends around and I don't feel comfortable asking them to bring other singles so that I'm not the only one among a bunch of couples (I don't want to seem like I'm coming off like I'm lonely either). Whenever I am invited to parties, all the normal seeming men are married or taken and the last remaining single guys tend to be very bizarre personalities. Aside from all that, I don't have the time to participate in other things I would enjoy where I could potentially be in the company of other single men. I'm already spreading myself so thin as it is. I love playing volleyball, but I just don't have the time to join a league .
I have one single friend to hang out with and so how am I supposed to meet anyone when this is how my day to day life is? I'm terrified of online dating, mostly because it doesn't sound natural to me and people, I hear mis represent themselves big time. The only place a good amount of single men are lately, are in bars/clubs and that is absolutely not my thing. I can't help but feel a twinge of sadness when I'm day in day out, always the only single one, but yet everywhere I go, the remaining singles are too young for me or just incompatible to me for whatever reason (mostly not attractive to me or no chemistry, or an agenda I'm not interested in). I'm thisclose to giving up on the whole thing, but maybe there is something else I can do. I'm not desperate, otherwise I'd date any of the men who have approached me already. I feel like my luck simply lies in where I'm going, but well..where do I go when I always see married men everywhere (that are most likely around my age)? I clearly live a very full life so my happiness is obviously not at stake, but I would like to add one more element: a relationship, that's all.
Some of my friends have tried to set me up, but it was against my will, and it felt unnatural and forced. On top of that, it just proved how little my friends know about me, but that's another story.
Anywho..another "frustrated dater" post, lol..I'm seriously at a loss, so should I be even more patient, or just give up, or try something else? Its been almost 2 years since I've had a relationship and I feel ready to "fall in love" again.
Mir, you are looking in the wrong places.
The bars, clubs, men's hangout places, the normal traditional dating is all long gone. You are likely to run into douchebags and players.
Somebody's given you wrong notions about online dating. They have some truth to it, but they are just being paranoid. There are as many creeps in the real world as in the online place.
Many professional men work 40 hours a week. These days they even work 45 to save their buns from the axe. These sweat shop fleas don't hang out in bars and clubs like the old days, American men are slowly learning to work things the Asian way, it's the sign of the times, and I can't blame them. Even the Friday night thing is a scam as many are working late. I keep hearing about how they spend quality time on all kinds of dating sites - these are investment professionals, tech professionals, financial advisers, business analysts and the like. I am pretty sure one of those guys is probably a good guy and you will find him to be the one.
Just don't go to any online guys private place. You are going to meet him in a public restaurant and he is definitely not going to kidnap you
Give online sites a shot. Take a few good pics, write a nice profile up, spell check it, and then you will be meeting new guys. If they are creepy, they will at least buy you nice food and dessert. Enjoy away
I have found joining meetup.com is a good way to meet people. I belong to a group of people who go biking, and a group that goes out to different places for pizza, and one that goes to different movies, and out for drinks. This is a good, casual way of meeting someone, without the pressure of "dating". I currently have one very good friend that I met this way, we are not dating, but enjoy each others company. But, I am much older than you..Anyway, find a group you like, maybe skiing...
You sound like a friend of mine. She is a bit older, early 30s, but all of our friends have coupled off in the last couple of years - except her. She was fine when the rest of us were single as well, but now that it's just her, she feels left behind.
Honestly, I am at a loss as to what to suggest for her to meet someone. We talk about it sometimes and I know her struggle is real because if I were in her shoes I would feel the same. I keep telling her to just wait for it to happen naturally, but I don't believe it in my heart.
I'm not asking for a lot and I just know what I don't want: smoker, druggie, rude, drinks/parties too much, bad hygiene and doesn't take care of himself at all are things I won't tolerate. Everything else is up to chemistry and compatibility. I never said I'm not responsible for my predicament either. I don't know what I'm doing, I just know I'm doing something wrong, as for what, who knows?
One final point since I realize you really do not want advice on changing yourself, just advice on where to find the hot single guys.
You told everyone what you did not want in a guy but you did not really give any specifics in what you did want. Tall or short? Fat or Thin? Hair or not? Educated or ignorant? Race or mongrel? Funny or serious? Smart or dumb? Rich or poor? Athletic or couch potato? Artistic or practical?
Though I expect your answer is back to compatibility or chemistry. Those are not really something that can be quantified or even be guessed at. Is a Mahjong player compatible? Does a avid bicyclist have chemistry? Does a rich man have both? Only you could know. Therein is the problem you have, I suspect.
The bars, clubs, men's hangout places, the normal traditional dating is all long gone. You are likely to run into douchebags and players.
Somebody's given you wrong notions about online dating. They have some truth to it, but they are just being paranoid. There are as many creeps in the real world as in the online place.
Many professional men work 40 hours a week. These days they even work 45 to save their buns from the axe. These sweat shop fleas don't hang out in bars and clubs like the old days, American men are slowly learning to work things the Asian way, it's the sign of the times, and I can't blame them. Even the Friday night thing is a scam as many are working late. I keep hearing about how they spend quality time on all kinds of dating sites - these are investment professionals, tech professionals, financial advisers, business analysts and the like. I am pretty sure one of those guys is probably a good guy and you will find him to be the one.
Just don't go to any online guys private place. You are going to meet him in a public restaurant and he is definitely not going to kidnap you
Give online sites a shot. Take a few good pics, write a nice profile up, spell check it, and then you will be meeting new guys. If they are creepy, they will at least buy you nice food and dessert. Enjoy away
haha, I didn't mean that I look in bars/clubs cause I only wind up there if a bunch of us are celebrating something. What I meant was that seems to be the only place lately that I am running into any available men my age, aside from men I meet through friends, of whom have not worked out so far.
As for online dating, I've heard lots of mixed things and I even tried it for a couple months once (I know, I know, that's not long enough and it was POF cause a friend suggested it and I felt very uncomfortable on there, go figure). One of my guy friends met his Fiance on E-harmony, some of my other friends met their so's online too, but for some reason, all the bad things I heard scare me out of it.
Anyways, that's an interesting tidbit on professional men. I didn't realize that! mostly because I work odd hours and my town doesn't have a lot of big companies (Raytheon and Davis Monthan Air force base and UofA are the big ones). Thanks for that bit of info! Gives me a clearer picture! And yes, those are more the kind of men I would prefer to date, just not sure if they are out of my league since I am still in school and nowhere near their level.
jasper-I've looked into meetup but they always meet up when I can't ..I am definitely keeping an eye out for events I am able to attend though!
spinx- I'm worried about freaking out even more when I hit 30 so I completely feel for your friend, heck my friends already feel bad for me! In a mid size town like where I live, everyone's married already. I'm left to hoping someone from out of town will come here for a job, single.
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