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If a child support payer quit their mind numbing office job to work full time on their garage band, would the child support courts understand and adjust their payments downward? I kind of doubt it works like that but I don't know. To me, this is just a less extreme case of that. That said, it doesn't seem like there is actually much onus on the receiving party to provide to the best of their ability so it probably wouldn't matter legally either way.
1. Legal guardianship? They have not been to court, as I said. I don't know what constitutes legal guardianship other than what a court decrees.
2. Primary residence? I estimate about 70/30, with the greater slice at Natalie's.
Does he help with finances as it is? If not then she needs to take him to court over it. However if he does then it's unfair that she should expect him to up his pay because she would like a certain job better. When we have kids we no longer have the luxury of always having the jobs we want.
I don't know if the courts can prohibit someone from quitting their job. My take on it has more to do with quality of life. I think it's fine if she wants to take a pay cut if it means she is happier at work. If she can still afford to take good care of her child, why not? She may have to give up some of her personal spending, but less stress makes for a happier parent.
You said the child is splitting time between both homes, but is it equal time? If she has the child the majority of the time, she should seek child support. That could help relieve some of the income concerns.
Quote:
Originally Posted by recuerdeme
She should do child support court now.
Why wait? Alienate Doug? If anything he'll feel the need to be with his kid more due to the money he has to shell out.
Since alimony has a bad name, child support was invented to supplant it. Basically, a reasonable arrangement would be for a man to pay for his share of the support of children. If one does an unemothonal review of actual incremental expenses, many c/s court orders are far in excess of what is really required. Men subject to these orders know that what they have been handed is alimony by another name. Many attempt to ensure that the money is actually spent on the children, but with no success.
Their only consolation is that these payments will end once the "children" are able to stand on their own, (usually after age 25, now days).
If, as often happens, the kids move back in with him, you would think it reasonable that he get a court order cancelling the c/s but as many men have found, the judge then shows their true intentions, by converting it to lifetime alimony.
The only way to make the system fair is to combine reasonable c/s with bridging financing for 3 to 5 years. If the mother is unable to financially make it on her own by then, the situation should be reviewed and custody awarded to the father. Kids need a good example in their lives and women who use others to avoid work are not setting a good example.
Does he help with finances as it is? If not then she needs to take him to court over it. However if he does then it's unfair that she should expect him to up his pay because she would like a certain job better. When we have kids we no longer have the luxury of always having the jobs we want.
He pays part of their son's daycare costs. He may cover the boy on his health insurance, but I don't know. I know Natalie has her own health insurance. Day-to-day stuff seems to be borne by the parent with whom the boy is staying at the time. Natalie probably buys the majority of clothes and toys.
I wish she would go to court and work all that out, but she won't. I think it would be easier to work this stuff out while the two of them are amicable (I don't know how expensive and time-consuming it is when there is no contest).
He pays part of their son's daycare costs. He may cover the boy on his health insurance, but I don't know. I know Natalie has her own health insurance. Day-to-day stuff seems to be borne by the parent with whom the boy is staying at the time. Natalie probably buys the majority of clothes and toys.
I wish she would go to court and work all that out, but she won't. I think it would be easier to work this stuff out while the two of them are amicable (I don't know how expensive and time-consuming it is when there is no contest).
Then she might as well keep her job....i don't see why she refused to get him to court as she is only hurting her child in the long run.
Reductions in court ordered support are rarely granted. DH pays support on a child he has never met (so much for more involvement from parents who pay support). At the time of the order he was making good money as a contractor. He has not had work in almost 4 years, although he takes every odd job he can find those jobs are few & far between with fierce competition leading to lower bids. We have requested a reduction time and time again and those requests have fallen on deaf ears.
I think if the economic responsibilities of this situation had already been determined by a court it wouldn't matter whether or not you changed jobs as long as you could still pay the amount that had been agreed to. This gets a little more complicated because the parents are not legally bound by any court decisions since they're attempting to work it out between themselves. That would seem to indicate that if the lower paying job was accepted and would result in less available money to support the child that a conflict is going to develop because the other parent would be expected to pick up those extra expenses. Of course the interests of the child are the most important and could very well mean that it may be necessary to keep the higher paying job for the time being even though it's a miserable job.
Are the parents happy with the way things are right now?
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