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In the recent past guys were attracted to girls they thought were physically pretty. The idea was they would date, fall in love, raise 2.4 kids and all that. The World was setup so that they (the guy) could support a family by working at the factory or in a profession, they did not concern themselves with anything but how cute the girl was. Times have changed.
Chances are, for simple economic survival, you will need that girl you are thinking of wooing to work. It is time to look at girls now as to whether they can be good providers. Is she smart enough to become a high paid professional? Or will she be stuck doing waitress jobs? No matter how cute she is to start with, if she can not earn money she is a bad choice to be pursuing. Your future depends on making the right choice.
Take a serious look at the girls in school. If they are party'ers and lack good grades do you think they will amount to much? Seek out that girl that hits the books and has plans beyond the Prom. You will be a lot happier married to someone making 6 figures than being poor married to one with a good figure. The one can buy you fun things the other just is fun for a few minutes a day. Not to mention the cost of having/raising kids requires a women that makes the dough.
The only real reason I'd care to be pretty well off (e.g. personal income at least 100K and combined household income at least 180K) is if I have kids. I'd like to live in a major metropolitan area like DC, SF, LA or maybe NY, and the cost of living is awful in these areas if you have kids. Why? Because you've either gotta live in an expensive part of town so they can go to excellent public schools, or live in any other part of town and pay out the ass for expensive private schools. At least that's how it is in DC, dunno about those other areas.
Other than that though I'd be fine with making no more than $60,000/year (adjusting for inflation as time goes on) in DC. I don't need a big house or a fancy car.
I don't care as long as she does something. If she likes her $10 and hour job in shipping and receiving, more power to her. Just don't expect me to slave away as she sits home with nothing to do and earning NOTHING!!! Ebay and babysitting are other options. No sloths, no way please!
In the recent past guys were attracted to girls they thought were physically pretty. The idea was they would date, fall in love, raise 2.4 kids and all that. The World was setup so that they (the guy) could support a family by working at the factory or in a profession, they did not concern themselves with anything but how cute the girl was. Times have changed.
Chances are, for simple economic survival, you will need that girl you are thinking of wooing to work. It is time to look at girls now as to whether they can be good providers. Is she smart enough to become a high paid professional? Or will she be stuck doing waitress jobs? No matter how cute she is to start with, if she can not earn money she is a bad choice to be pursuing. Your future depends on making the right choice.
Take a serious look at the girls in school. If they are party'ers and lack good grades do you think they will amount to much? Seek out that girl that hits the books and has plans beyond the Prom. You will be a lot happier married to someone making 6 figures than being poor married to one with a good figure. The one can buy you fun things the other just is fun for a few minutes a day. Not to mention the cost of having/raising kids requires a women that makes the dough.
I agree with your opening statement to an extent but when it comes to choosing a women.
Morals and her principals over her income ALWAYS.
Nowadays alot of women cheat. ALOT and women are very traitorous.
Wether she's a stripper, does nails for a living, a porn star, or an ordinary recepetionist her occupation and how much money she makes has little to do with what type of person she has.
My wife yes I know she is still my wife called me having sex with another guy on the phone but she's active in her church.
I know alot of strippers who I know for a fact never cheated on their man.
I've been backstabbed and seen many guys get backstabbed by their women.
The best advice I would give someone my age is to analyze a women's character before you date them only because once you start dating them they have their guard up.
NEVER LISTEN TO WHAT A WOMEN SAY. LOOK AT WHAT SHE DOES. How does she treat people in general. If SHE tells a lot of WHITE LIES. RED FLAG.
Is she sneaky? Is she slick? Is she over protective with her cell? Analyze and always question yourself. Just because she hits the books doesn't mean she isn't dangling 3 guys she's leading on.
And I reccomend to wife a girl who is below your level in looks or status. Just make sure you can get more girls then she can get men or be around the same level. You be surprised alot of women get guys who are below them as security. She can cheat faster then he can and cut him lose faster and use his feelings for her as leverage. It happen to me and alot of guys.
If you insist on going out with a women who's hot MAKE SURE YOU HAVE YOUR DUCKS in order and you can get alot of women because she will run you.
It doesn't matter if she's making Oprah Winfrey money getting tossed up in the backroom of her studio; sending you calls to vm with plans on leaving you because your not satisfying her needs cause you wife up a selfish, lying getting money chick. I know its a run on sentence. get the picture?
I think dating history is important. If they have had good relationships (on their part) its a better sign. Also see what kind of company she keeps (ie. all her friends cheat).
Personality/morals are the most important. Compatibility is very important.
In the end you need a strong relationship as well as for both of you to have good moral character.
About your third or fourth date, take her to a nice restaurant and observe how she treats the waiter/waitress. Because in another six months, that's how she'll be treating you.
Honest and consideration are, above all, the most important thing you can look for. And don't settle for that "I'm the most honest person I know" speech either. Simply observe her in her actions. You'll know what kind of person you're dealing with. Actually that advice is true in dealing with anyone.
I don't think that the two things are mutually exclusive.
My advice to young men would be to do what they are hard wired to do, and what they've always done. Look for the girl who makes your toes curl, and the rest will work itself out.
i agree with veyron, but the OP also makes good points. just because a girl is studious, hard working and average looking doesn't mean she won't give you the run around, and just because a girl doesn't have a high paying job doesn't mean she'll cheat on you.
character (in relationships) is often independent of career success/failure.
Honest and consideration are, above all, the most important thing you can look for. And don't settle for that "I'm the most honest person I know" speech either. Simply observe her in her actions. You'll know what kind of person you're dealing with. Actually that advice is true in dealing with anyone.
damn straight
i don't know if i agree with the OP, that a 6-figure earner is the key to a good wife. there are more important things than money.
I don't think that the two things are mutually exclusive.
My advice to young men would be to do what they are hard wired to do, and what they've always done. Look for the girl who makes your toes curl, and the rest will work itself out.
Absolutely not! You get a girl that thinks that you should be supporting her (horrors). In these days where it is more likely the girl that gets the jobs that would leave you with no support. Picking girls on such foolishness will lead to a life of poverty and sub compact cars.
Quote:
Originally Posted by le roi
damn straight
i don't know if i agree with the OP, that a 6-figure earner is the key to a good wife. there are more important things than money.
While a 6 figure earner is to be preferred, so long as she can support the family with her income, it may not be required. And if there is something more important than money what is it and what does it cost to acquire it?
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