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Well I was somewhat suspicious. On the one hand I thought the girls who supposedly liked me were nice and started to have a crush on them. But on the other hand, I never made a move because I thought it could just be a joke. I was really wacky and crazy when I moved to a new school, because I didn't want to be the quiet kid any more. The girl I sat next to found my antics incredibly annoying. Then after one popular girl chased me, the girl I sat next to told me the chaser really liked me. And so it became a big thing of people telling me the chaser liked me. And she would follow me and stuff. And then girls who had previously been annoyed by me, decided it would be more fun to outdo the chaser in liking me rather than just being a messenger. And thats how it all started, and it continued with varying degrees of intensity with different girls all the way till I graduated HS for 6 years.
But how do I know it was fake? Well, because besides being suspicious, the other reason I never made a move was because I had really puritanical values about sex. I had this whole idea about being a noble character who couldn't be distracted by temptresses. But recently I realized that my values had been totally defeated in 2011 America, and how hopeless it was to cling to them. So I decided if you can't beat em, join em. And I actively tried to be a pick up artist. My miserable failure there, made me realize what a freak I was now, and had always been and thus how retarded I was for being taken in. So no I'm not paranoid, just opened my eyes from self-delusion.
The fact that girls thought you were annoying then suddenly liked you is a red flag. You might be onto something when you think they were pretending to like you.
Some people on this site have horrible self-esteem. And thats at the root of thier problems with not getting girls.
You make it sound like the low self-esteem is the reason they don't get girls. But maybe it's the other way around. Maybe they started out with high self-esteem, but no girls were into them so that's why they have low self-esteem now.
I'm the idiot? I've never even seen what the chick looks like. I was making a sarcastic joke and SHE understood it for what it was. You are not being very smart on picking up on it.
I don't know why some posters dismiss the idea that girls might play mind games and pretend to like a guy.
I just remembered a time when something like this happened to me. My example is not as extreme as the OP's example, but here it goes:
When I was in 8th grade, there was a girl that I had multiple classes with. She spent an entire Friday pretending to like me and she even gave me a fake number. I called the number later that day. When she didn't answer, I thought something fishy might be going on.
It got to the point where people asked me if I was going out with her. I don't know if they were in on the joke or not. Some people were surprised that a girl like her was interested in a guy like me. I guess that should have been a sign right there that something was off. But being the naive 13 year old I was, I thought she was really into me. When we went back to school on Monday, I found out this was all just a joke.
Drop the misogynist pick up artist, blogs, and porn. Immediately. You've started to recognize the negative effect they have on your opinions regarding both yourself and women. Also, drop the absurd idea of being 'friendzoned.' It's a concept invented by misogynistic a-holes who only think with their little heads.
Women are people. Not objects, not possessions, not conquests. We're PEOPLE. Treat us as such. Treat us as friends. BE a friend. That's how you MAKE friends.
I've said it before and I'll say it again... The longest lasting, happiest romantic relationships are between those who consider themselves best friends.
I agree, but what you ignore is there has to be a romantic attraction to start the relationship.
Also, your causation is completely backwards in your implication that porn and pick-up artist blogs are the cause of his Madonna-***** complex. That kind of thing is caused by parental attitudes, a Catholic upbringing, maybe hitting puberty too early...I don't know. But it ain't porn. Every guy watches porn.
The poor guy has to begin the process toward being a man who can attract women somewhere. He's going to make some mis-steps, and you see what those mis-steps can look like if you scroll through pickup blogs, with some of the (rather amusing, if you unclench your fists) comments those poor fellas make. BUT AT LEAST THEY'RE STEPS. If everybody chided the guy for even trying, like you're doing, he'd be an inhibited shell for the rest of his life.
And yes, I do mean "chided." You congratulated him, but you congratulated him for giving up, is what you did. You basically said, don't try to actually be attractive to girls -- that's not for you, that's for other men. In my opinion, that's true for no man.
I don't know why some posters dismiss the idea that girls might play mind games and pretend to like a guy.
I just remembered a time when something like this happened to me. My example is not as extreme as the OP's example, but here it goes:
When I was in 8th grade, there was a girl that I had multiple classes with. She spent an entire Friday pretending to like me and she even gave me a fake number. I called the number later that day. When she didn't answer, I thought something fishy might be going on.
It got to the point where people asked me if I was going out with her. I don't know if they were in on the joke or not. Some people were surprised that a girl like her was interested in a guy like me. I guess that should have been a sign right there that something was off. But being the naive 13 year old I was, I thought she was really into me. When we went back to school on Monday, I found out this was all just a joke.
Because we: a) are girls, or b) have had successful relationships with girls.
You shown time and again to know absolutely nothing about male-female attraction, and you refuse to listen to people who do understand it.
Your posts are the relationship advice equivalent of "a plus sign means you subtract." If followed, failure will ensue. Again.
In high school, the "most popular cheerleader" paid a lot of attention to me, a huge music geek that couldn't make friends.
I assumed she was trying to get me to play along with her "joke" for three years.
I ran into her after college. She said it wasn't a joke, but was too shy to actually ask me out. She was afraid of rejection because I would have thought it was just a joke (which I did think).
I didn't really like her, but it would have sure been flattering at that age, ya know?!
In college, I was paranoid just as miyu suggests to you. I missed out on something potentially amazing for the same reasons I wrote about my high school experience. Except in college, I did like the girl. Even a bunch of years later, I still wonder what would have happened if I just wasn't so paranoid all the time.
It's never a joke. Those girls were all attracted to the OP, if he's telling the story right. He just didn't do anything to maintain the attraction.
Because we: a) are girls, or b) have had successful relationships with girls.
You shown time and again to know absolutely nothing about male-female attraction, and you refuse to listen to people who do understand it.
Your posts are the relationship advice equivalent of "a plus sign means you subtract." If followed, failure will ensue. Again.
But that doesn't change the fact that some girls play mind games. I gave an example of a time when that happened to me in 8th grade. I know enough to know the girl from 8th grade was pretending to like me. She even admitted it.
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