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I was in high school in the mid 70's. We didnt have cell phones to call some one every 10 minutes, or texting some one every 5 minutes. If they were available, i guess we would of done the same thing as today. But im glad we didn't. All those phone calls ans texts would of ruined mine and my girlfriends time at the Drive-in.
But in-between girlfriends we had the Apple II, the Commodore 64 and 56k modems to contend with.
But in-between girlfriends we had the Apple II, the Commodore 64 and 56k modems to contend with.
Hey, what can I say - once a nerd...
My mom was a computer programmer in the early 80's and man... people sure thought we were cool for having that Commodore 64.
I remember liking a boy in high school and literally biding my time for months, if not years, to actually be in contact with him. I feel like kids these days are much more assertive; both males and females. They like someone, they text them or start hitting them up on Facebook. In my day, a girl liked someone, they passed notes or told friends to quietly check around to see if anyone had heard whether or not the guy maybe liked her back. Then the girl would have friends put out the word that she had a crush on the guy and it would go from there.
My mom was a computer programmer in the early 80's and man... people sure thought we were cool for having that Commodore 64.
I remember the day I got my first Commodore disk drive, to replace the cassette-tape drive - it was like waking up next to a super model.
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I remember liking a boy in high school and literally biding my time for months, if not years, to actually be in contact with him. I feel like kids these days are much more assertive; both males and females. They like someone, they text them or start hitting them up on Facebook. In my day, a girl liked someone, they passed notes or told friends to quietly check around to see if anyone had heard whether or not the guy maybe liked her back. Then the girl would have friends put out the word that she had a crush on the guy and it would go from there.
Perhaps that long, exhaustive process actually served a purpose - sort of a vetting process. You had to go through multiple check-points - friends, parents, friends of parents and parents of friends (each of whom had the opportunity to rant or rave about you two) - before you were sure it was "good".
With today's instant-on tech, there are no such speed-bumps on the way to the superhighway. Hence, the all-too-familiar crash scenes on the side of the road (and in the forums).
I am unarguably part of Generation Y (born 1986). My parents are between the Baby Boom generation and Generation X (born 1961 and 1963). They met at 18 and 16 respectively, paired together almost immediately, and had been either dating or married ever since until my father passed away in 2006, so I can't get a good perspective from them. I also think dating culture varies almost as much between socio-economic class as it does generation. Lower-class people seem to have a different set of norms regarding love and relationships than upper-middle class people do.
What strikes me about dating today is how few people, especially in their high school and college years, actually date. When I was in college, a lot of both girls and boys preferred to "hook up" at parties (usually under the influence of alcohol) to fulfill their physical desires rather than actually enter into a relationship. The line between "girlfriend" and "girl who's my friend" is definitely being blurred. One other change that has occurred right before my eyes is ironically girls have gotten a lot more paranoid about "stalkers" and "creeps". I usually don't go to clubs or bars, but have heard that girls usually hang out with their friends (facilitated by text messaging) and only their friends and are wary of strangers ("randoms") approaching them.
What I conclude from this is 1) dating is dying, at least among the college and high school age groups, and replaced by non-comittal sexual encounters, usually while under the influence of alcohol and 2) romance and the infatuation of newly-paired couples is dying with it - how much "romance" do you think can occur between two just-before-passed-out drunk people?, and 3) within groups of friends ("cliques") the rules are a lot less strict though from the outside they are impenetrable.
I am unarguably part of Generation Y (born 1986). My parents are between the Baby Boom generation and Generation X (born 1961 and 1963). They met at 18 and 16 respectively, paired together almost immediately, and had been either dating or married ever since until my father passed away in 2006, so I can't get a good perspective from them. I also think dating culture varies almost as much between socio-economic class as it does generation. Lower-class people seem to have a different set of norms regarding love and relationships than upper-middle class people do.
What strikes me about dating today is how few people, especially in their high school and college years, actually date. When I was in college, a lot of both girls and boys preferred to "hook up" at parties (usually under the influence of alcohol) to fulfill their physical desires rather than actually enter into a relationship. The line between "girlfriend" and "girl who's my friend" is definitely being blurred. One other change that has occurred right before my eyes is ironically girls have gotten a lot more paranoid about "stalkers" and "creeps". I usually don't go to clubs or bars, but have heard that girls usually hang out with their friends (facilitated by text messaging) and only their friends and are wary of strangers ("randoms") approaching them.
What I conclude from this is 1) dating is dying, at least among the college and high school age groups, and replaced by non-comittal sexual encounters, usually while under the influence of alcohol and 2) romance and the infatuation of newly-paired couples is dying with it - how much "romance" do you think can occur between two just-before-passed-out drunk people?, and 3) within groups of friends ("cliques") the rules are a lot less strict though from the outside they are impenetrable.
This is a good post. Much of what you said is true. I have a thread about how it can be hard to tell the difference between couples and friends.
I'm young (younger than you...I was born in 1991). I think you might be onto something when you say people are more paranoid about creepy people these days. I don't remember the word "creeper" being popular until I was 16. But I recently found out my 12 year old cousin uses the word creeper. What's the world coming to? I guess they start young these days.
And when I was in high school, I remember a guy saying he doesn't have girlfriends...he talks to girls and hooks up with them. A lot of people in our generation think like him.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tvdxer
I am unarguably part of Generation Y (born 1986). My parents are between the Baby Boom generation and Generation X (born 1961 and 1963). They met at 18 and 16 respectively, paired together almost immediately, and had been either dating or married ever since until my father passed away in 2006, so I can't get a good perspective from them. I also think dating culture varies almost as much between socio-economic class as it does generation. Lower-class people seem to have a different set of norms regarding love and relationships than upper-middle class people do.
What strikes me about dating today is how few people, especially in their high school and college years, actually date. When I was in college, a lot of both girls and boys preferred to "hook up" at parties (usually under the influence of alcohol) to fulfill their physical desires rather than actually enter into a relationship. The line between "girlfriend" and "girl who's my friend" is definitely being blurred. One other change that has occurred right before my eyes is ironically girls have gotten a lot more paranoid about "stalkers" and "creeps". I usually don't go to clubs or bars, but have heard that girls usually hang out with their friends (facilitated by text messaging) and only their friends and are wary of strangers ("randoms") approaching them.
What I conclude from this is 1) dating is dying, at least among the college and high school age groups, and replaced by non-comittal sexual encounters, usually while under the influence of alcohol and 2) romance and the infatuation of newly-paired couples is dying with it - how much "romance" do you think can occur between two just-before-passed-out drunk people?, and 3) within groups of friends ("cliques") the rules are a lot less strict though from the outside they are impenetrable.
They're paranoid precisely because they put themselves in these situations. For all the liberation that we have, I have the suspicious feeling that in the year 2011 we are still oppressed and oppressed in some ways we weren't before.
Yeah I know...it's really frustrating meeting women in clubs or bars because they just talk among their friends or text (ban those damn things, I tell ya!). Yeah approaching some girls they either ignore you or give you the 'leave me alone creep!' expression. The men are all horny tossers while the women are stuck up biatches, one makes the other.
I had to quit trying to give my daughter dating advice because nothing I said matched up with the what she was actually experiencing. Things I told her to do backfired, etc.
My son has old fashioned ideas. Once he took out a girl he met online (friend of a friend) and didn't kiss her and after she got home she texted him and said that since he didn't try anything she didn't see the point of the second date he invited her on. He's had rotten luck with girls, they either just want to be friends or are total sluts.
Welcome to the reality of American women in 2011. From what I can see, there literally are not any worth dating.
so when were the good old days?
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