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Old 01-18-2012, 09:26 AM
 
Location: Viña del Mar, Chile
16,393 posts, read 30,872,263 times
Reputation: 16642

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cletus Awreetus-Awrightus View Post
ok; why?

i haven't heard any compelling reasons, just a bunch of finger-wagging, and platitudes that seem to have some sort of implied metrosexual / Oprah ethic behind them.

i come from the school of thought that says you should acknowledge your emotions, not wish them away, and that's exactly what I do. I don't respect men who feminize themselves out of shame.

Well it really depends on how you act, if you show too much jealousy, it just makes you look like a little bit*h, not tough in the least bit.

Most guys know when a "friend" is overstepping his boundries, and I think it is pretty normal to want to kick that guy's ass if you think so.

I actually misread your post, and thought you were the OP and would get so mad that your gf was talking to guys on facebook you wanted to fight every one.
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Old 01-18-2012, 09:36 AM
 
3,457 posts, read 3,616,531 times
Reputation: 1544
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vic 2.0 View Post
Acknowledging your emotions and normalizing them are two different things. And you seem to think there is no happy medium between harboring violent desires and being a pushover.

Realizing that these violent desires are unhealthy (not to mention risky) is the idea. Coming to agree with society on this matter does not equal letting the world "beat you into submission". It just means you've grown up. In truth, you are beating YOURSELF by NOT coming to this realization because hostility is a known predictor of heart disease and similar health problems. Even if you don't hurt someone else, you are hurting yourself.

The problem is, this is much like walking around with a loaded gun. Normally, you can keep yourself from using it. But if you are suddenly or extremely angered and stressed out, you may act without thinking at all.
These aren't compelling reasons. The "maturity" argument is just garden variety peer pressure; you can tell someone they're "immature" over just about anything.

The comments about my health, and the "risk" involved, is just speculation on your part.

The suggestion that I "normalize my emotions" is psychobabble.

I'm just not buying what you're selling, which is a solution to something that I don't think is a problem.
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Old 01-18-2012, 10:21 AM
 
Location: TX
6,486 posts, read 6,371,847 times
Reputation: 2628
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cletus Awreetus-Awrightus View Post
These aren't compelling reasons. The "maturity" argument is just garden variety peer pressure; you can tell someone they're "immature" over just about anything.

The comments about my health, and the "risk" involved, is just speculation on your part.

The suggestion that I "normalize my emotions" is psychobabble.

I'm just not buying what you're selling, which is a solution to something that I don't think is a problem.
You don't have to "buy" anything, but I'm afraid you're wrong that saying that hostility contributes to heart problems is just speculation. The following article is quite old, and the findings are even older. Some might even call it common knowledge at this point...

Hostility Predicts Heart Disease

And "normalizing emotions" just means that you are calling it normal to have such strong emotions. This is a far cry from the definiton of 'psychobabble'.
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Old 01-18-2012, 10:33 AM
 
Location: Sacramento, Ca.
2,441 posts, read 3,423,860 times
Reputation: 2629
Yeah, most folks like to think that they are above natural human insecurities because it is what everyone says is weak. Nahh... Think for yourself bro. Dont let people who dont take their feelings seriously tell you how you should feel. Not everyone has to be alike. Youre and individual. And not every philosophy or politically correct trend ou there is wise. If your gf needs attention and friendship from other of guys to feel alright, let her have it. She's not looking for commitment. She just needs social validation, which is also ok for her. But you howevever, need to go find one that suits and respects how you feel. They are out there and are not wierdos.
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