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Old 01-24-2011, 08:54 AM
 
Location: Between Philadelphia and Allentown, PA
5,077 posts, read 13,628,732 times
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I have a married friend. She is always two steps behind. Her and her husband both work. She works part time and also fills in part time at our local riding barn. They have two kids, both kids are involved in several extra-carricular activities, they (the adults) both have hobbies. She just seems like she is out of her mind crazy busy all the time. Fact is, she's very much an ADD type and craves craziness and has the need to be busy all the time.
When you get married and have kids, yes, the activity levels do pick up and you're more busy. Even non married couples can find themselves busy. I just got out of a long relationship, I was much more busy being involved with someone who had to be busy all the time vs now where I just take my time, I relax and other than having to be at work, I have no responsibilities or timelines or crazy schedules. It's really just when you combine your life with someone else that people get busy. It has nothing to do with marriage in and of itself.
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Old 01-25-2011, 04:37 PM
 
13,393 posts, read 16,937,479 times
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Originally Posted by Bass101 View Post
I'm confused about why there is a general thought that married people are so busy? I've been married 7 years, and am in my early 30's, and I'm not busy in any way, shape, or form (just work and taking care of the house, and that's it).

When people usually make this statement they're not commenting that married people with kids are so busy (I understand how this might be the case) but more that just being married somehow makes you busy. I hear this a lot from single female friends in their late 20's/early 30's who are annoyed that their friends got married and are now "too busy" to hang out with them anymore. But what are they "too busy" doing? It seems that being married is equated with being boring and just wanting to stay at home all the time. I'm certainly not like that!

Would love to hear others' thoughts on this.
It's not really that their friends are "too busy" to hang out with them, that's just a nice way of saying I'd rather hang out with my mate
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Old 01-25-2011, 04:55 PM
 
28,900 posts, read 49,273,246 times
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Originally Posted by purehuman View Post
It's not really that their friends are "too busy" to hang out with them, that's just a nice way of saying I'd rather hang out with my mate
Well, you hit on a truth there. Namely, that some friends from one's single life can't accept that you're now married and you actually like spending time with the person you just married. For about two years after we were married, my wife's best friend kept finding ways to get into the middle between us.

My wife travelled a great deal for work when we were first married, typically 50% of the time. Yet, whenever she got off the road, her friend was hounding MrsCPG to go out with her on the weekends. Or she would try to find ways to manipulate us and cause trouble.

For example, we were going out to eat on Saturday night, and this person invited she and her husband along. Now, this was going to be our evening out, since she had been on the road the previous two weeks. What's more, I don't care for Mexican food (I don't hate it, but I've never left a Mexican restaurant saying, 'Wow, what a great meal!'). Not only did this woman insinuate her way into our night out, but then told MrsCPG that she wanted to try this new Mexican place.

MrsCPG told Cynthia, "Well, CPG doesn't like Mexican all that much."

To which Cynthia replied, "Just tell him it's Spanish. He'll never know the difference." So not only was she horning in on our night out, but she was telling my wife that I was stupid to boot. Nice.

This woman kept trying to monopolize my wife's time a lot in our first couple of years, until I finally asked MrsCPG, "Are you married to Cynthia or are you married to me? I really need to know."
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