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Some good ol fashioned communication can shed some light on it simply being what she likes or if she has some trouble(s) with other forms of sexual expression. Dertermine where you are with that and the rest should fall into place.
I have heard of other men who said there SO showed a strong preference for clitoral stimulation and my own wife preferred it far more than anything else. I could always tell when she was truly needy because she would assume the position and want me to get at what just flat worked for her without the undue delay of foreplay or intercourse. This was never a problem for me because she was always willing to meet my needs as well although I prefer variety so I never really had a go to whatever. I'm reading into it a little here and you do not flat say it but it is implied that you are not getting turnabout? I guess to me the bottom line is that you are both satisfied. If she is meeting your needs and you hers its all good but it appears this is not happening? IMO there is nothing wrong with either giving or taking unilaterally in sex. Our code name for I need it bad so just do me was "a 68", comes from an old joke. In other words you do me now and I owe you one later. : ) Got to have that turnabout though....
Not sure about your ages, but have you tried using lubricants? Dryness could be a problem and since your wife doesn't like to talk about it, she might not bring it up. Hopefully, this is still PG-13.
I don't think it's abnormal...women have many more of the nerve endings that create pleasurable sexual sensations externally than internally. However, these nerve endings CAN be stimulated during penetration, as well as external play, manually or otherwise.
I'd say that the real concern is if there's no consideration going on for what your needs and likes are, only hers. The communication breakdown is obviously the biggest concern.
i think the fact that she doesnt want to talk about it will only make the "problem" continue. but talking about it in a clinical way might bother her.
i dont know this stems from something in her past, or some way she was brought up that makes her think sex is bad. not sure.
have you tried reading to her, maybe some sort of romance novel? sometimes that helps stimulate some women. ask her if she would like to try some of the things you are reading about etc.
Whatever works for both people is "normal." The problem here is that you don't seem all that into what gets her off. So compromise is in order as well as more communication. Sex doesn't have to be penetration: mutual masturbation, oral... it's all good.
It's because the clitoris is external. The vagina has less to do with sexual pleasure for many women. The male equivalent of having "normal internal female sex" would be to have gay buttseks but expecting a guy to get off without any stimulation of the missile. How many guys would go for that?
If she likes it I don't see why it can't be normal. But if she is having pain or something with internal sex then she might be having some medical problem which should be addressed.
I don't know how to say this gently, but your wife needs to assume some responsibility here and learn how to talk about things, even if it makes her uncomfortable. You're her husband and life partner, and communication is just as much her responsibility as it is yours. Maybe there's some trauma in her past, but it's not fair of her, as a grown woman at this late date, to do this to you.
Whether the act itself is normal or not doesn't matter. What is not normal is the way she is handling your attempts to do the right thing and talk about it like two adults. We all have our issues, but at some point in our maturity, we realize that it is not fair to punish someone else for them or inflict them on someone else, least of all the person who loves us most.
I find the fact that she prefers to lay on her stomach interesting. Rather than increasing stimulation (which could be done in virtually any position), it seems that she is avoiding emotional contact with you (looking in your eyes, watching your face), during the process. This is troubling.
It is strange in terms of not being conventional because the missionary position is the most common one and preferred by many women. However, it's not so strange in terms of emotional contact because doggie style is probably the 2nd or 3rd most favorite position among men. I guess what's good for the gander is good for some geese... In other words, it's not only most men who are emotionally uninvolved.
I would suggest this is not true intimacy insofar as there is a compromise meeting of the man's needs which appears consistently in deference to the woman's needs. That discussion of other positions, needs, desires, wants are apparently avoided leaves a void in the area of true sharing and vulnerability, on top of what others have stated about avoidance of eye contact. Clinical conversation or not, being unable to be sexually fulfilled for lack of discussion is not normal. This isn't just about the physical bump-and-grind, it is about connection and contact. The OP doesn't feel a connection because there is no discussion. All other positions aside, this is not fulfilling specifically because there is no discourse. This shows the OP often wants more than just a port.
Are there other topics off-limits? How long have you been married? When did this start? Was it ever different? Sorry, as it is described, this sounds like a miserable 'default' choice and it is quite disappointing. While sex isn't everything, intimacy is, and it seems absent here.
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