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I'm sure there was alot more going on after 27 years of marriage...living in a mobile home w/out any actual flooring while he built a two-story workshed...her working to pay bills while he worked to support his multitude of Harleys...etc etc etc... but, unstable she isn't, but I thank you for the complimentary thoughts anyway.
Koale
should I shave my head if my wife is not okay with it?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Koale
I'm sure there was alot more going on after 27 years of marriage...living in a mobile home w/out any actual flooring while he built a two-story workshed...her working to pay bills while he worked to support his multitude of Harleys...etc etc etc... but, unstable she isn't, but I thank you for the complimentary thoughts anyway.
Koale
Do you have personal info about these two the rest of the forum readers don't have? I didn't see anything about a floor and building a workshop. Nor did I see any thing about her working, he said she was a stay at home mom. Are you talking about the same couple we have been discussing? Please don't tell me you are a newspaper reporter by occupation...
i'd like to ask you a question that has been bothering me a bit. For a fuller context, i think i should share the following:
1. I'm 34 years old, and bold normally. I have a norwood type 6 (vi) - 7 (vii) baldness since about 5 years ago. (in other words, it's not like i have fabio hair which makes me stand out, etc...) when we were married, in 1999, i had more hair but it was obvious that i was losing it.
2. When i shaved my hair, my wife made a very big deal about it. I think that she feels it makes me look like a gangster or someone who belongs in prison. I want it shaved because it makes me younger. Again, i'm already 60-70% bold anyways.
So, what do you think? Should i shave my head or not?
Yes you should shave your head because i personaly think people who are really balding look better that way, but mostly because you want to.
And here are my short opinions on your other problems, since you listed them:
Quote:
Originally Posted by bigv
1. She does not want me to get a firearm in the house. this is legit. You should definetely not do it if it makes her uncomfortable
2. She does not want me to workout (since that creates more laundry for her) do a load of laundry every day that you workout. Solves prob #2 and #3?
3. She wants me to do more work around the house (though i work full time and my wife is a stay at home mom) see above
4. She is against any electronics toys that i purchase (i purchased an ipod touch and a smart phone, both of these resulted in a bad reaction). if you can easily afford these, she should shut up. It's something you want and earned that's useful. But only if you couldn't easily afford it, then it was a luxury that affected your family negatively which is selfish. Be honest with yourself about whether you easily afforded it and which category those purchases fit in without your wife's annnoyance or your phones fun-ness persuading you.
After reading more of the OP's post my suggestion would be 'to wear your hair like you want to wear it'. I settled most of these things with my wife before we got married. I told her that firearms were a part of my life and if that was going to bother her then she needed to speak up before we got married. Anyone that tries to control what you do in your spare time is going to be a problem. The longer you are married to her, the more she will expect in alimony. If she were my wife, she would be living else where tomorrow and my exwife next week. I lived with a woman that had your wife's attitude, for 20 years, it won't get better until you end it. Normally, this wouldn't be my advice, but once a woman thinks she owns you, there is not much else you can do. The only way you will make your wife happy is to submit to her every whim and to become a 'doormat'.
This part of your posting is key. You settled this before you got married. The issue here is that before they got married OP and his wife had no firearms in the house. Now he wants to change the state of things and get one. She has every right to balk. He's changing the deal on her.
even though I was thinning, I did not think I'll be as bald by 34 as I am today. We were married when I was 22-23 and she was 19-20.
Also, I did not have the same attitude about guns in my 20's as I do now. Though gun ownership is not the main issue right now (though it may become one after I grow my hair back).
In addition, I think the looks are subjective. I'm sure that if I were thinning and shaved the top of my head only, my wife would have told me that I look ridiculous. Now that the hair on the top is all gone naturally, I all of a sudden look good? If I look like a reflection in a car door, what does it matter if I'm shaved or not?
When I asked for the opinions of those around me, most say that i should keep it shaved, though some say let the hair grow out a bit.
Thanks for all your comments. Unfortunately, the responses here mimic those in the real world. Ranging from no, to yes.
I'd like to ask you a question that has been bothering me a bit. For a fuller context, I think I should share the following:
1. I'm 34 years old, and bold normally. I have a Norwood type 6 (VI) - 7 (VII) baldness since about 5 years ago. (In other words, it's not like I have fabio hair which makes me stand out, etc...) When we were married, in 1999, I had more hair but it was obvious that I was losing it.
2. When I shaved my hair, my wife made a very big deal about it. I think that she feels it makes me look like a gangster or someone who belongs in prison. I want it shaved because it makes me younger. Again, I'm already 60-70% bold anyways.
So, what do you think? Should I shave my head or not?
I realize that these things are subjective, but I figure if I'm ugly being bold, I'd probably not be uglier shaved, right? I feel that the issues between me and wife are of a control type. And no, shaving my head is not the only problem we have.
Some other problems are:
1. She does not want me to get a firearm in the house.
2. She does not want me to workout (since that creates more laundry for her)
3. She wants me to do more work around the house (though I work full time and my wife is a stay at home mom)
4. She is against any electronics toys that I purchase (i purchased an ipod touch and a smart phone, both of these resulted in a bad reaction).
I'm sorry, but any woman who does NOT want her husband to work out..., well I just can't even deal with that perspective at all.
As far as the shaving of the head, ABSOLUTELY YES. Men generally look YOUNGER and much sexier with a shaved head. With all the other crap she's laying on you, I would go for it.
even though I was thinning, I did not think I'll be as bald by 34 as I am today. We were married when I was 22-23 and she was 19-20.
Also, I did not have the same attitude about guns in my 20's as I do now. Though gun ownership is not the main issue right now (though it may become one after I grow my hair back).
In addition, I think the looks are subjective. I'm sure that if I were thinning and shaved the top of my head only, my wife would have told me that I look ridiculous. Now that the hair on the top is all gone naturally, I all of a sudden look good? If I look like a reflection in a car door, what does it matter if I'm shaved or not?
When I asked for the opinions of those around me, most say that i should keep it shaved, though some say let the hair grow out a bit.
Thanks for all your comments. Unfortunately, the responses here mimic those in the real world. Ranging from no, to yes.
People's tastes vary. Some people like shaved heads, some don't. Some people put their spouse's desires over their own, some don't. I think your question about hair is part of a much bigger issue, though, and it's hard not to address all of it.
even though I was thinning, I did not think I'll be as bald by 34 as I am today. We were married when I was 22-23 and she was 19-20.
Also, I did not have the same attitude about guns in my 20's as I do now. Though gun ownership is not the main issue right now (though it may become one after I grow my hair back).
In addition, I think the looks are subjective. I'm sure that if I were thinning and shaved the top of my head only, my wife would have told me that I look ridiculous. Now that the hair on the top is all gone naturally, I all of a sudden look good? If I look like a reflection in a car door, what does it matter if I'm shaved or not?
When I asked for the opinions of those around me, most say that i should keep it shaved, though some say let the hair grow out a bit.
Thanks for all your comments. Unfortunately, the responses here mimic those in the real world. Ranging from no, to yes.
Seriously??? You thought unicorns and tooth fairies post here
People's tastes vary. Some people like shaved heads, some don't. Some people put their spouse's desires over their own, some don't. I think your question about hair is part of a much bigger issue, though, and it's hard not to address all of it.
This is an immigrant family, if I recall BigV saying it
The American viewpoint on deteriorating relationship may not apply here.
She's probably pissed off she is working her buns off and big boy comes home and watches TV, becoz he is the "sole" breadwinner, and is entitled to be the house's emperor.
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should I shave my head if my wife is not okay with it?
, well I just can't even deal with that perspective at all. 
