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I wasnt sure where to post this at so I decided here was a good place to start.
Ok I am 20 yrs old, I live with my BF and a room mate (bf's friend) I let him move in since we have a 2 bedroom and werent using the 2nd bedroom for anything. My roomate is 19 yrs old and is still in high school. He moved from out of state to live with his cousin. For some reason that didnt work out and he asked if he could move in with us. I told him sure just give me $50 a week ($200 a month) My rent is $470 and I pay water gas and electric as weel as the cable bill so I think he's getting off pretty well. i wish I could live somewhere and only pay 200 for room and board. Well he recently got a gf and that was where the trouble bagan. They argue ALOT. These arguments most of the time turn phusical and while in the begining I would try to stop it now I just dont care because you cant save someone who doesnt want saved right? Well I guess my neighbors complained about the arguing and my rental ofc said if they get anymore complaints then we have to move. So of course I told the gf she couldnt come over anymore.
Not only that but Ive told them both multiple times if she wants to spend the night more than twice a week and take any showers at all then she had to pay rent aswell. Well they thought that was so unfair. She used the excuse thats almost all of your rent! Ok but its not touching the other bills. And I also said should she agree to pay the rent she can not have a key to the house. I know thats not fair and I wouldnt agree to it if I were her but hey its my home and I barely know her!
So she called me a few minutes ago and asked if she could be allowed to come over and she promised they wouldnt argue.
I don't think that's unreasonable at all. I wouldn't want my roommate bringing over a GF (or bf... one of my roommates is gay...) and fighting constantly, especially if it got physical! I mean, an argument here or there is one thing, but physical is another. And yeah, you can't help someone who doesn't want it, but you also don't have to hang around them, either.
Also, if someone spends the night once in awhile, I don't really mind that either... but there is a point where if they're staying constantly, they're showering and eating and hanging around, etc... I'd want to see them chip in some, too, or see your roommate contribute more. I had a roommate who, at one point, had her BF over for two weeks straight. I was a bit annoyed but was like "hey, whatever." Then, she invited another friend to come crash in her room with them, and that was the tipping point: I said no, and that if she wanted her BF to keep staying, he was going to chip in to the bigger picture (we'd split it three ways with me paying slightly more than either of them since I had my own room and they were sharing; it still would have lowered my rent by about $250). They did it for a month and then he moved out.
At the end of the day, she's not on the lease, so you have a lot more say as to what's fair than what she does. Is your roommate on the lease? If not, then same deal... he should understand that paying $200/mo is a steal and he should be respectful of you and your wishes.
What does your bf say about all this? I wouldn't have someone jeopardize my living arrangement because of their fighting. I might suggest that they get a 1 bedroom apt for themselves since he's paying $200. If a 2 bed apt is $470 there then a 1 bed apt might be $370 so the gf could come up with the $170 extra.
You are just asking for trouble by letting her boss you around. It's your apartment and you need her/him to follow the rules. I would take the rental office's threat of kicking you out very seriously. It's tough being a grown up but take care of you first and fore most. If he has access to his room and the rest of the apartment i.e. kitchen, bath etc.. he should be paying half the rent period! and that includes utilities
yea all of this makes so much sense. My bf doesnt say much until I ell him to, im pregnant so I make him do the dirty work lol. And thats the biggest reason all of this has to change because im moving into a house for the baby in august and im not taking them with me!
Im just going to sit down with them both tonight and say he has 2 weeks to get out. ( he is not on the lease)
yea all of this makes so much sense. My bf doesnt say much until I ell him to, im pregnant so I make him do the dirty work lol. And thats the biggest reason all of this has to change because im moving into a house for the baby in august and im not taking them with me!
Im just going to sit down with them both tonight and say he has 2 weeks to get out. ( he is not on the lease)
That's reasonable to give both of them 2 weeks notice. They are trying to take over your apt and they need their own place. Just make sure they don't get violent with you since they both seem to like to express themselves physically.
(But I'll admit I am extremely compassionate so maybe I just see it differently). If it were me, I would tell the roommate (who is a HS student, right??) that he has 30 days to find some place else to live, and that in that 30 day period, the girlfriend is not allowed over.
yea that sounds a bit better...i have that problem too...ill be real fired up like YEAH THIS IS HOW ITS GONNA BE! and then my room mates mom who lives in chicago calls and is like "please can we work something out he has no where else to go?" and ill feel bad and say ok. GRRRR DARN THESE HORMONES
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