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Old 08-31-2019, 09:54 AM
 
Location: Nowhere
10,098 posts, read 4,061,528 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by simpleharmonicmotion View Post
There's a guy at work I cannot stop thinking about. I do feel like I get some vibes from him, but I am not completely sure. At one point, he looked right at me and we definitely locked eyes for a split second longer than what is okay in polite society. He has also shown some other signs of seeming interested, but they are so subtle that I do not know if he just thinks I'm another cute girl walking around or if this is something I should take seriously.

He seems very reserved in general to everyone and I know he feels stressed already as he is an intern (I work at a hospital). But, he has said a few things to me here and there. To make things worse, I am new at this workplace and I can feel a little bit out of place at times so I can get a little bit aloof and reserved myself. I have been told that I can come off cold and hard to get to know. I really have not gone out of my way to say anything to him either honestly. These sideways glances and vibes have been going on since August- the first time I noticed him. The second time we saw each other he pretty much stared at me the whole time- I was completely unnerved by the shock of this guy staring at me to look back and on top of that-was too busy trying to focus as we were in the ER and there was a level 1 trauma going on in front of us needing to be taken care of.

Throughout all of these months I have seen him on and off, here and there. Sometimes weeks have gone by before I see him. I have backed off totally mostly because I feel like if he was interested he would have said something by now-sent me a work email or stopped me in the hallway or asked my coworker about me. I really try to make it seem like I am not interested because I feel like a fool being interested in a guy that doesn't reciprocate. My coworker tells me that maybe he is just intimidated. I say that most people, including guys, usually want to get what they want and aren't going to wait. Right now I am seeing him pretty regularly. I don't know what to think or say or do, if I should at at all. I still feel if he likes me more than just thinks I'm cute, he'll say something, right? Keep in mind that I also feel incredibly sheepish about this whole thing. I barely know who this guy is outside of how attracted I feel towards him and the fact that he is a resident at the hospital I work at. I am rarely this viscerally attracted to someone so this is a big deal to me.

So basically, what I am trying to ask if do men indeed become intimidated by women or is this something women tell themselves to lessen the pain of rejection?

I always have. That said, I got the one girl in high school who was the finest...albeit very briefly. I was too young to know how to treat her or be in a relationship. Girl was stunning though - almost like a young Pamela Anderson.


I've gotten worse with age...and sobriety. When I was a drunk and drinking my way through college, I had way more nerve and found my first real relationship that way (was with her for 5 years).


I'm getting old now and I think with age my nerves have actually gotten worse, not better (as I would have thought they would).


Beautiful women are VERY intimidating. For me for sure.
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Old 08-31-2019, 03:49 PM
 
Location: Oklahoma City, OK
5,353 posts, read 5,778,572 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kavalier View Post
I always have. That said, I got the one girl in high school who was the finest...albeit very briefly. I was too young to know how to treat her or be in a relationship. Girl was stunning though - almost like a young Pamela Anderson.


I've gotten worse with age...and sobriety. When I was a drunk and drinking my way through college, I had way more nerve and found my first real relationship that way (was with her for 5 years).


I'm getting old now and I think with age my nerves have actually gotten worse, not better (as I would have thought they would).


Beautiful women are VERY intimidating. For me for sure.
Same here. Though I'm told I'm good looking, I always feel like I don't have whatever it is these women want. I get intimidated and won't approach.
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Old 08-31-2019, 11:26 PM
 
20 posts, read 9,496 times
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Absolutely. Women are often very intimidated by good looking men. The more they try to fight it though, the more obvious their attraction becomes lol.
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Old 08-31-2019, 11:37 PM
 
10,341 posts, read 5,839,803 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by steveo101 View Post
Absolutely. Women are often very intimidated by good looking men. The more they try to fight it though, the more obvious their attraction becomes lol.
That wasn’t the question though...
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Old 09-01-2019, 06:50 AM
 
Location: Nowhere
10,098 posts, read 4,061,528 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by steveo101 View Post
Absolutely. Women are often very intimidated by good looking men. The more they try to fight it though, the more obvious their attraction becomes lol.
I think more men have the problem than women do.


Of course I don't have data here to back it up, but I'm guessing I could find data to back up that claim.
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Old 09-01-2019, 07:04 AM
 
Location: (six-cent-dix-sept)
6,639 posts, read 4,543,441 times
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i'm not intimidated by women; but, i am intimidated by humans. so i usually dont meet new persons.
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Old 09-01-2019, 07:15 AM
 
7,583 posts, read 4,133,507 times
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It's possible they get intimidated. The woman can take steps to put him at ease, which may include backing off and letting him make a clear move after the woman feels she has made her intentions clear verbally. For me, staring back is not enough. Actually talking to me is the way to go.
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Old 09-01-2019, 09:41 AM
 
728 posts, read 470,603 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 49ersfan27 View Post
Easier said than done. Some guys who are shy don't interact with women at all.
True. That's what I do (in this case, don't, I guess)
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Old 09-01-2019, 10:22 AM
 
Location: Nowhere
10,098 posts, read 4,061,528 times
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There is a female I just noticed at one of the buildings I work at. I drive from building to building in my line of work, and I stop at this place only a couple times a week.


I noticed her a few weeks ago but made nothing of it. Then last week she walked in front of my car - kind of in the middle of the parking lot and then sat down away from her place of work. Then she walked behind my car and I was watching her as she walked away and then when she was down a way, she looked back (clearly looking at me).


Right then I knew she was interested. She's not like killer or anything - in fact she is maybe not even my type as she is a tad heavy but I'm pretty desperate so this coming week I'm hopeful I see her again. Gonna see if I have enough nerve to spit some game - anything I can to make small talk with her.
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Old 09-01-2019, 10:34 AM
 
10,341 posts, read 5,839,803 times
Reputation: 17884
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kavalier View Post
There is a female I just noticed at one of the buildings I work at. I drive from building to building in my line of work, and I stop at this place only a couple times a week.


I noticed her a few weeks ago but made nothing of it. Then last week she walked in front of my car - kind of in the middle of the parking lot and then sat down away from her place of work. Then she walked behind my car and I was watching her as she walked away and then when she was down a way, she looked back (clearly looking at me).


Right then I knew she was interested. She's not like killer or anything - in fact she is maybe not even my type as she is a tad heavy but I'm pretty desperate so this coming week I'm hopeful I see her again. Gonna see if I have enough nerve to spit some game - anything I can to make small talk with her.
Just don’t phrase your ‘game’ in a way that reveals you think she’s a tad heavy, and you’re a tad desperate. At least she does a lot of walking, she may be in great shape.
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