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So I have always heard this expression but haven't always really understood it or taken it to heart.
Until recent years...the more I am exposed to and reminded of those who are seriously less fortunate...those who are ill, abused, homeless...I grew up in a country where there were people who lived in the ditches that lined the streets of our gated compounds. They were naked, skinny...god knows what they did to survive.
Today I see death and illness and abuse and violence on a daily basis (bc of my work). I encounter those who have lost everything or everyone.
So now, as an adult, I really realize what counting your blessings is all about. I see that you have to choose to be happy and remember everything you have...
But every day, I hear b*tching and moaning from all sorts of people about the most petty problems. People who have everything but can still somehow let the most minor irritations get to them.
Even my wife gets angry with me when she's upset about something (and ranting) and I say, "But did the universe explode? No? Then it will be ok." If you won't even remember it in a few weeks, why destroy your happiness over it?
I can't see it anymore. We have our home, our health, our family...we are financially incredibly well-off...I don't understand wallowing in unhappiness and anger when we have everything...I don't have much patience anymore for people who can't appreciate this in their own lives.
Yes, we can let every little thing affect us negatively and make us simmer with anger for days...but I don't see what the point of that is. We are on this planet for such a short time. Why not save those negative emotions for things that really matter?
So I have always heard this expression but haven't always really understood it or taken it to heart.
Until recent years...the more I am exposed to and reminded of those who are seriously less fortunate...those who are ill, abused, homeless...I grew up in a country where there were people who lived in the ditches that lined the streets of our gated compounds. They were naked, skinny...god knows what they did to survive.
Today I see death and illness and abuse and violence on a daily basis (bc of my work). I encounter those who have lost everything or everyone.
So now, as an adult, I really realize what counting your blessings is all about. I see that you have to choose to be happy and remember everything you have...
But every day, I hear b*tching and moaning from all sorts of people about the most petty problems. People who have everything but can still somehow let the most minor irritations get to them.
Even my wife gets angry with me when she's upset about something (and ranting) and I say, "But did the universe explode? No? Then it will be ok." If you won't even remember it in a few weeks, why destroy your happiness over it?
I can't see it anymore. We have our home, our health, our family...we are financially incredibly well-off...I don't understand wallowing in unhappiness and anger when we have everything...I don't have much patience anymore for people who can't appreciate this in their own lives.
Yes, we can let every little thing affect us negatively and make us simmer with anger for days...but I don't see what the point of that is. We are on this planet for such a short time. Why not save those negative emotions for things that really matter?
Anyone else feel the same?
Completely agree with you about happiness being a choice
And counting your blessings is a way of reminding you to choose happiness.
However, like your wife sometimes I just need to vent about cr#p. I don't let the cr#p ruin my happiness or steal it, I just need to vent it out so it doesn't stick with me and pollute my happiness
Completely agree with you about happiness being a choice
And counting your blessings is a way of reminding you to choose happiness.
However, like your wife sometimes I just need to vent about cr#p. I don't let the cr#p ruin my happiness or steal it, I just need to vent it out so it doesn't stick with me and pollute my happiness
I see what you're saying. And I sure as hell don't want to seem unsympathetic. She just tends to hold on to stuff for longer than I think is necessary. And then sometimes her frustration spills out onto innocent victims (namely me...or the dogs)...I think that's destructive and pointless.
But this is not a thread about my wife (who is almost perfect in every way)...it's about my astonishment at those around me who have so much but can discount it so easily.
We tend to take our reality for granted so quickly.
Maybe people need to take a day off from having utilities or not eat food for a day or put a tack in their shoe and walk around on it all day...just to remember and remind themselves of how good they really have it.
It's like whenever I have a cold, I think, "Holy crud! I forgot how nice it is to be able to breathe through my nose!" But how often do I think about breathing any other time?
So I have always heard this expression but haven't always really understood it or taken it to heart.
Until recent years...the more I am exposed to and reminded of those who are seriously less fortunate...those who are ill, abused, homeless...I grew up in a country where there were people who lived in the ditches that lined the streets of our gated compounds. They were naked, skinny...god knows what they did to survive.
Today I see death and illness and abuse and violence on a daily basis (bc of my work). I encounter those who have lost everything or everyone.
So now, as an adult, I really realize what counting your blessings is all about. I see that you have to choose to be happy and remember everything you have...
But every day, I hear b*tching and moaning from all sorts of people about the most petty problems. People who have everything but can still somehow let the most minor irritations get to them.
Even my wife gets angry with me when she's upset about something (and ranting) and I say, "But did the universe explode? No? Then it will be ok." If you won't even remember it in a few weeks, why destroy your happiness over it?
I can't see it anymore. We have our home, our health, our family...we are financially incredibly well-off...I don't understand wallowing in unhappiness and anger when we have everything...I don't have much patience anymore for people who can't appreciate this in their own lives.
Yes, we can let every little thing affect us negatively and make us simmer with anger for days...but I don't see what the point of that is. We are on this planet for such a short time. Why not save those negative emotions for things that really matter?
Anyone else feel the same?
Yes. Absolutely.
One charitable organization I support with my time is one that helps homeless families, the working poor who have no place to live because of loss of job, fire, medical problems, and other disasters.
My four-year-old nephew just received an all-clear PET scan after surviving a particularly virulent form of cancer, Burkett's Syndrome. But there were a lot of families who were not so fortunate, and lost their children as a result.
A neighbor down the street is in his 80s and survived the Holocaust. He never mentions it, but one sees the tattooed number on his arm. I cannot imagine the horrors he witnessed.
My plumber did not show up to finish a job in late April. Annoyed, I called to find out what was up, only to find that he lost his wife and daughter in an F4 twister that swept north of town.
And the list goes on and on. Children with serious disabilities. Wracking and painful diseases. Poverty. And that doesn't even include people who live in truly impoverished countries that simply cannot afford the extraordinary safety net we have here.
Knock on wood, I have my health. I have a loving and healthy family, an adoring wife and three intelligent and well-adjusted children. I have a way to earn a living. I have good and true friends. I have my faculties. I have money in the bank. Anything beyond that is gravy.
As you said, people who think they have it bad generally have no idea how bad it can get.
I see what you're saying. And I sure as hell don't want to seem unsympathetic. She just tends to hold on to stuff for longer than I think is necessary. And then sometimes her frustration spills out onto innocent victims (namely me...or the dogs)...I think that's destructive and pointless.
But this is not a thread about my wife (who is almost perfect in every way)...it's about my astonishment at those around me who have so much but can discount it so easily.
We tend to take our reality for granted so quickly.
Maybe people need to take a day off from having utilities or not eat food for a day or put a tack in their shoe and walk around on it all day...just to remember and remind themselves of how good they really have it.
It's like whenever I have a cold, I think, "Holy crud! I forgot how nice it is to be able to breathe through my nose!" But how often do I think about breathing any other time?
You sound like my husband He never lets stuff get to him - deals with all things in stride. But me? I've got to allow myself to feel what I'm feeling, bit*ch and moan a bit, and THEN let it go - maybe it's just the estrogen
One charitable organization I support with my time is one that helps homeless families, the working poor who have no place to live because of loss of job, fire, medical problems, and other disasters.
My four-year-old nephew just received an all-clear PET scan after surviving a particularly virulent form of cancer, Burkett's Syndrome. But there were a lot of families who were not so fortunate, and lost their children as a result.
A neighbor down the street is in his 80s and survived the Holocaust. He never mentions it, but one sees the tattooed number on his arm. I cannot imagine the horrors he witnessed.
My plumber did not show up to finish a job in late April. Annoyed, I called to find out what was up, only to find that he lost his wife and daughter in an F4 twister that swept north of town.
And the list goes on and on. Children with serious disabilities. Wracking and painful diseases. Poverty. And that doesn't even include people who live in truly impoverished countries that simply cannot afford the extraordinary safety net we have here.
Knock on wood, I have my health. I have a loving and healthy family, an adoring wife and three intelligent and well-adjusted children. I have a way to earn a living. I have good and true friends. I have my faculties. I have money in the bank. Anything beyond that is gravy.
As you said, people who think they have it bad generally have no idea how bad it can get.
You sound like my husband He never lets stuff get to him - deals with all things in stride. But me? I've got to allow myself to feel what I'm feeling, bit*ch and moan a bit, and THEN let it go - maybe it's just the estrogen
Judging from the period I had last month, my estrogen is still working, too...LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, you might have a family, home, health, ableness, etc...not everyone else does, and we do not have an extraordinary safety net here. In fact, most modern industialized countries are better off than the USA in that respect. I don't even view emotions as negative or positive, just simply reactions. They might be helpful or unhelpful for getting what you want out of life but any other qualitative judgment is a personal reflection.
Happiness is a choice. I have a Pinay friend who told me about a recent trip she made to visit her family. She in herself is a sad story. She lost everything after working for more than 30 years. Anyway, she told me about families literally living in the streets who were still smiling, laughing and enjoying life.
More of us need to count our blessings.
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He never lets stuff get to him - deals with all things in stride. But me? I've got to allow myself to feel what I'm feeling, bit*ch and moan a bit, and THEN let it go - maybe it's just the estrogen 
