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Old 01-04-2012, 02:33 PM
 
9,408 posts, read 13,732,444 times
Reputation: 20395

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Quote:
Originally Posted by onihC View Post
Maybe a lof of women enjoy giving away power when it comes to dating..
Maybe they do.

I don't know much about dating, we don't really have a dating culture in New Zealand. Even with my American SO we didn't date, we got to know one another online before we actually met.
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Old 01-04-2012, 02:36 PM
 
2,028 posts, read 1,887,300 times
Reputation: 1001
Quote:
Originally Posted by cwamjn View Post
Some guys out there don't want a woman to offer to pay, because it is insulting to them.
Why do you believe they find it insulting? Getting to the bottom of that question would probably reveal a lot about their mentality.
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Old 01-04-2012, 02:41 PM
 
2,028 posts, read 1,887,300 times
Reputation: 1001
Quote:
Originally Posted by Djuna View Post
Money is about power and control. If you allow a man to pay for everything you give away your power. Equality in relationships also means paying your fair share, or at least offering.
I agree, +1 Djuna.
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Old 01-04-2012, 02:43 PM
 
3,083 posts, read 4,874,727 times
Reputation: 3724
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93 View Post
It wasn't all this - we have to make sure everything is 50/50!!! How much have you paid? How many times have you asked me out? How much do you like me? What have you done for me? How have you showed me that you like me.
I know right?...we are talking about dating not an audit or an exercise in relationship accounting (do both sides of the relationship balance perfectly). This type of thinking just will not work in an established relationship, essentially it is like keeping score, it just leads to bitternes on both parts in the end.
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Old 01-04-2012, 02:44 PM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
819 posts, read 1,129,282 times
Reputation: 1279
Quote:
Originally Posted by Freedom123 View Post
Me, because they ask ME out.
I'm sure...
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Old 01-04-2012, 02:48 PM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
21,192 posts, read 25,152,722 times
Reputation: 22275
Quote:
Originally Posted by onihC View Post
Not so sure about just "offering". I don't think women would be happy that their man just "offered" to do house chores but didn't do anything about it or if he said that he tried but always get beat to the punch. Personally, I am all for men doing all house chores with women as much as I am about women also taking men out, paying for dates, taking the initiative, and so on (even first dates) .
Actually - I think it is exactly the same thing. When someone offers to do something - you have the choice to take them up on it or ignore it. You said that some women offered to pay but they didn't seem firm about it so you didn't let them pay. The other women seemed more firm about it so you let them. Whether or not the women have paid has come down to you. When my husband offers to do the dishes - I LET HIM!!! I don't care if he means it or not! An offer is an offer! What you do with it is up to you.
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Old 01-04-2012, 02:50 PM
 
3,083 posts, read 4,874,727 times
Reputation: 3724
Quote:
Originally Posted by himain View Post
Seriously besides my vagina paying for the date...If were dating, the guy should pick up the tab but I have no problem picking up the tab every once in a while. It's only fair besides the whole vagina thing. Now if we're living together, etc, then it comes out of the house account which we both put money into for situations like this, bills, purchases, etc. Then we both have our own account for things we want to purchase personally for ourselves.
so are you saying that because you use your vagina the guy should pay...that sounds an awful lot like...well you know
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Old 01-04-2012, 02:59 PM
 
2,028 posts, read 1,887,300 times
Reputation: 1001
Quote:
Originally Posted by Free Beer View Post
I'm sure...
I guess since you don't know me that's the best you can come up with. I'm lucky enough to swim in a niche dating pool that puts me in enough demand to be asked out by women.

Care to elaborate on your previous statement? I'm curious, is there something wrong with a man allowing a woman who asked him out to pay for the date?
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Old 01-04-2012, 03:07 PM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
819 posts, read 1,129,282 times
Reputation: 1279
Quote:
Originally Posted by Freedom123 View Post
I guess since you don't know me that's the best you can come up with. I'm lucky enough to swim in a niche dating pool that puts me in enough demand to be asked out by women.

Care to elaborate on your previous statement? I'm curious, is there something wrong with a man allowing a woman who asked him out to pay for the date?
Two things:

1) Girls who ask dudes out are all kinds of trouble, certainly not marriage material.

2) Being a gentleman means you pay for dates. It also means you pick up the check when you're out with friends, within reason. If you can't afford to do either, you can't afford to go out.

Apparently you have bought into some feminist lie, which is fine if you want to date feminists and not actually be a man.
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Old 01-04-2012, 03:16 PM
 
16,235 posts, read 25,196,835 times
Reputation: 27047
Quote:
Originally Posted by greenvillebuckeye View Post
Just ended a "relationship" with a girl who ended it by texting me saying she needs a guy who pays for things the majority of the time. Keep in mind I paid for the first 4 dates, a weekend trip to the beach for two and this past weekend she paid for waffle house and then we split a meal at panera bread. a few hours later after panera she texts me saying she needs a guy who pays for the majority of the dates. i didn't realize that her paying for waffle house was too much for her haha. i'm a teacher and make a king's ransom obviously ;-). i also drove us everywhere and would buy her random things like cigarettes, wine, even cooked meals at her place i bought everything from the grocery store.

so ladies how long into a dating do you start paying?
It is a fortunate thing that you find this out before any more time, money or efforts were wasted on your part. You got lucky
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