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Old 12-23-2012, 05:03 PM
 
Location: Albuquerque, NM
13,290 posts, read 15,226,169 times
Reputation: 6657

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Quote:
Originally Posted by YellowT View Post
Yes if I'm in an exclusive relationship we alternate paying.

I asked because, I've been out on dates with this dude for five times and I wonder if the next one he expects me to pay.
Thought you got dumped?

Offer to pay...
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Old 12-23-2012, 05:04 PM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,112 posts, read 30,530,848 times
Reputation: 16394
I either pay my share, or I pay the whole bill from date 1. I don't believe I've ever been on a date where the guy has paid the entire first date bill.
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Old 12-23-2012, 05:10 PM
 
Location: The Hall of Justice
25,901 posts, read 42,538,579 times
Reputation: 42762
Offer to pay. If he doesn't want you to, he'll argue with you, and if he does he'll be relieved.
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Old 12-23-2012, 05:10 PM
 
Location: OC/LA, California
313 posts, read 661,973 times
Reputation: 108
Quote:
Originally Posted by filihok View Post
Thought you got dumped?

Offer to pay...
That was a dude that I went out twice.

I need an honest opinion from guys. Do you find it rude if girls don't pay or don't offer to pay and no matter how much you like her you would stop seeing her? Or you don't mind paying all the time so long you spend time with a girl you really like?
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Old 12-23-2012, 05:14 PM
 
3,452 posts, read 4,594,069 times
Reputation: 4985
Quote:
Originally Posted by YellowT View Post
My friends and I were discussing about this. Apparently, one of my friends never paid for any dates even she's already in a committed relationship with a guy. I on the other hand doesn't pay till I'm in a committed relationship. I think whoever does the asking out will have to pay and I don't ask a guy out till were officially bf/gf (I almost once but had to think it twice and it didn't happen). Another friend pays even if it was the guy who ask her to hang out. She pays for the whole bill or pays half.

I went out with a guy for seven months and he paid for all our dates. I currently seeing a dude and the last five dates he paid. All the other guys I've been out with, they paid for our dates. I don't mind paying but only if I'm in a committed relationship with that person I'm dating and if I'm the one asking the person out.

So I wonder, after how many dates does a girl start paying half or paying for the whole date?

If you really really like the guy and see him as someone you could be with long term.....OFFER TO PAY FOR THE FIRST DATE. I guarantee you if he is like any of the guys I know he will be IMPRESSED and SHOCKED. I only know of two men that has ever had this happen. And the women that did this ended up getting an engagement ring after a few months.

I wouldn't recommend a lady do this for every guy, but if you really want to impress him then do it. Most men will not allow you to pay, but the gesture will definitely make you stand out from all the others he had dated.
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Old 12-23-2012, 05:16 PM
 
1,754 posts, read 2,460,522 times
Reputation: 3666
Quote:
Originally Posted by YellowT View Post
That was a dude that I went out twice.

I need an honest opinion from guys. Do you find it rude if girls don't pay or don't offer to pay and no matter how much you like her you would stop seeing her? Or you don't mind paying all the time so long you spend time with a girl you really like?
Offer to pay. Now close this thread before the angry virgins bust in.
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Old 12-23-2012, 05:16 PM
 
3,452 posts, read 4,594,069 times
Reputation: 4985
Quote:
Originally Posted by YellowT View Post
That was a dude that I went out twice.

I need an honest opinion from guys. Do you find it rude if girls don't pay or don't offer to pay and no matter how much you like her you would stop seeing her? Or you don't mind paying all the time so long you spend time with a girl you really like?

And yes we do find it rude if she doesn't offer. I have had women turn their head when the paycheck came. Some have even gotten up and went to the restroom. Absolute turnoff. Splitting the bill will get the same result as not offering to pay.
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Old 12-23-2012, 05:19 PM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,112 posts, read 30,530,848 times
Reputation: 16394
Quote:
Originally Posted by usamathman View Post
If you really really like the guy and see him as someone you could be with long term.....OFFER TO PAY FOR THE FIRST DATE. I guarantee you if he is like any of the guys I know he will be IMPRESSED and SHOCKED. I only know of two men that has ever had this happen. And the women that did this ended up getting an engagement ring after a few months.

I wouldn't recommend a lady do this for every guy, but if you really want to impress him then do it. Most men will not allow you to pay, but the gesture will definitely make you stand out from all the others he had dated.
It's funny, because I've always paid my share, or paid the entire tab on first dates and rarely get to date 2, much less an engagement ring

I'm thinking that the guys I've gone out with (mostly via online dating) are relieved to have me offer to pay because they don't expect to go on a second date and are happy they won't be losing money.

I don't think it's impressed any of the guys I've gone out with.
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Old 12-23-2012, 05:29 PM
 
Location: Westminster, CO
904 posts, read 1,377,097 times
Reputation: 1258
So you're quite the player. One guy you've been out with five times and you went out with the guy who "dumped" you after you didn't return his call a couple of times. Then their was the musician.

You must be a very popular girl.
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Old 12-23-2012, 05:30 PM
 
3,452 posts, read 4,594,069 times
Reputation: 4985
Quote:
Originally Posted by JetJockey View Post
It's funny, because I've always paid my share, or paid the entire tab on first dates and rarely get to date 2, much less an engagement ring

I'm thinking that the guys I've gone out with (mostly via online dating) are relieved to have me offer to pay because they don't expect to go on a second date and are happy they won't be losing money.

I don't think it's impressed any of the guys I've gone out with.
Nothing wrong with that Jet Jockey. Consider yourself lucky to have not wasted any more time with guys like that. Some guys don't know a good thing when they see it. Their loss. I would absolutely flip in my chair if I met a decent looking woman who played tug of war for the first check.

You seem like a cool gal. Don't let the bad experiences spoil what is to come in the future.
Contrary to popular belief there are good guys out there who appreciate acts such as women offering to pay for first date. Real men looking for committed relationships will not let a woman like that get away. But guys looking for sexual hookups will.

Might want to check the date-o-meter to see if it is working correctly. Picker make be off a little.
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