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Old 12-25-2012, 12:05 PM
 
12,998 posts, read 13,573,417 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by filihok View Post
Why do you feel this way? For any reason other that 'tradition'?
Just tradition, I guess. Even though I'm young(ish)? (or old, depending on your age, I guess ... mid 30s), I can tell I'm getting older. When I was dating age, it would have been considered really weird and kind of gauche to expect a woman to pay for a date. I realize that that's not necessarily the case any more. Maybe nice young couples who respect each other and enjoy spending time together have non awkward ways to split the bills. Maybe I'd be the odd one in today's dating world for always expecting to pay, but that to me just seems like basic manners.
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Old 12-25-2012, 12:07 PM
 
Location: Albuquerque, NM
13,290 posts, read 15,225,076 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WestCobb View Post
Just tradition, I guess.
And why do you think that that tradition came about?
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Old 12-25-2012, 12:13 PM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,112 posts, read 30,529,206 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Betsy84 View Post
Then men should bring this up clearly when he meets a woman. If it isn't brought up and he pays anyway...his problem.

There was another thread about this recently....why don't men clearly state that this is their preference.

Hmmm...
I think a good idea would be for these guys to keep track of all the dates and then present her with a bill at the end of the month. Ask for payment and give her a few options (cash, check, credit card, paypal etc.) and see how that goes.

Maybe make her sign a dating contract midway through the first just to make sure everyone is on the same page regarding payment and money.
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Old 12-25-2012, 12:15 PM
 
12,998 posts, read 13,573,417 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by filihok View Post
And why do you think that that tradition came about?
I understand it's from an era when women had less power and property than men, but I still like it. To me it's just being a good gentleman with good manners to not discuss money on a date.
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Old 12-25-2012, 12:16 PM
FBJ
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,605 posts, read 58,776,020 times
Reputation: 9451
Quote:
Originally Posted by WestCobb View Post
Just tradition, I guess. Even though I'm young(ish)? (or old, depending on your age, I guess ... mid 30s), I can tell I'm getting older. When I was dating age, it would have been considered really weird and kind of gauche to expect a woman to pay for a date. I realize that that's not necessarily the case any more. Maybe nice young couples who respect each other and enjoy spending time together have non awkward ways to split the bills. Maybe I'd be the odd one in today's dating world for always expecting to pay, but that to me just seems like basic manners.

They usually pay for 1 date early on to confirm their interest in you. Do you understand now?
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Old 12-25-2012, 12:17 PM
 
12,998 posts, read 13,573,417 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TVandSportsGuy View Post
They usually pay for 1 date early on to confirm their interest in you. Do you understand now?
I think there are better ways to tell if a woman is interested in you for you than forcing her to pony up for a steak.
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Old 12-25-2012, 12:24 PM
 
Location: Albuquerque, NM
13,290 posts, read 15,225,076 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JetJockey View Post
I think a good idea would be for these guys to keep track of all the dates and then present her with a bill at the end of the month. Ask for payment and give her a few options (cash, check, credit card, paypal etc.) and see how that goes.

Maybe make her sign a dating contract midway through the first just to make sure everyone is on the same page regarding payment and money.
Yeah, because that makes a lot more sense than just splitting the bill.
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Old 12-25-2012, 12:24 PM
FBJ
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,605 posts, read 58,776,020 times
Reputation: 9451
Quote:
Originally Posted by WestCobb View Post
I think there are better ways to tell if a woman is interested in you for you than forcing her to pony up for a steak.
Others ways you can tell

1. She will offer to pay the tip

2. She will surprise you and agree to pay for dinner



This happens during the first 4 dates
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Old 12-25-2012, 12:26 PM
 
Location: Tha 6th Bourough
3,633 posts, read 5,766,509 times
Reputation: 1765
Quote:
Originally Posted by WestCobb View Post
Women usually provide WAY more emotional support than men, TV. I have a lot of female and male friends. The females are MUCH more supportive. That's just what women do. If you share your problems with a male friend, his attention will probably wander off in the middle of it. If you share your problems with a female friend, she's likely to bring it up days later and have words of encouragement or advice. .
I think it varies for different people. In my experience my male friends have shown more support as females seemed to treat me and my issues as if I would get by and be ok. Like last year when I found out my mom had a brain tumor and my brother almost died twice within the year amongst some other things, the only person who offered prayer or lent an ear was a guy friend of mine...The women I knew who also knew about these things must have thought it was either no big deal or I was some superhuman male that didn't need any encouragement. So, it isn't the case for everyone that women are so supportive as you are suggesting. It may be different for other people like myself.
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Old 12-25-2012, 12:26 PM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,112 posts, read 30,529,206 times
Reputation: 16394
Quote:
Originally Posted by filihok View Post
Yeah, because that makes a lot more sense than just splitting the bill.
Well, then you run the risk of her wanting to tip more, or not giving you enough. And what if you only have cards? Do you split it down the middle even though you got a steak and she only got a chicken salad?

I mean, if you're going to do it, you may as well do it right.
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