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Really? Never wanting to hear your child's problems growing up doesn't make you a bad parent?-lol Isn't that what parenting is? Buying food, clothes, and giving a child a roof over their head is what a parent supposed to do
I've seen lots of people that didn't have one or both parents turn out perfectly fine and become successful adults. Not everyone grows up with issues. After a certain age, they realize that they've become adults and can own their own lifes and make their own decisions, and not use the "I didn't have a mom or dad and therefore I'm this way" excuse as a crutch or way to form pity upon themselves.
Then you of all people should understand? Perhaps you can show that woman who never had a male role model that not all men are jerks.
It's not my job to show her that. I don't expect a woman to show me what a female role model is like because my mom wasn't around. And I had my grandparents. Most people in my situation don't have a role model. I was lucky to have my grandparents. They're the reason I turned out the way I did.
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And who doesn't have issues these days? If it's not daddy issues, it's something else.
Most people don't have parents that work until 8 at night, are too self-absorbed to begin with, and have their parents raise their kids. That was my situation. Dad worked as a pediatrician and Mom worked as a lawyer. One of them dropped me off at school and didn't see them until late that night. If I saw one of them before 7 that night, I was lucky. My grandma usually picked me up from school and I spent most of the evening with my grandparents. My grandpa taught me every bit of manual labor and my grandma helped me with my homework. Ate dinner there, hung out there, and they raised me.
Even on weekends, my dad was often on his boat and my mom was doing whatever she was doing. Once in a blue moon, one of them took me to the park, mini-golf, or whatever I wanted to do. My grandparents stepped in on several occasions, telling them they needed to own up to their responsibilities. My grandma told me the only thing she and my grandpa regretted was not fighting for custody of me.
And how would you feel if someone said that they didn't want to be with you because of your situation?
Are people who come from broken homes supposed to live alone the rest of their lives? This is something that they didn't ask for.
And how would you feel if someone said that they didn't want to be with you because of your situation?
Are people who come from broken homes supposed to live alone the rest of their lives? This is something that they didn't ask for.
Nothing I can do. I can't say I blame them. If I were them, I'd be hesitant too.
Seriously? Seriously? The one person who wrote the bible on every requirement known to man and some only to God is asking a question like this and even wonders about it? I used to think the lightbulb was on and no one was home, but not only is the lightbulb burned out - the electricity was turned off a long time ago.
"I want him to have a good relationship with his mom"
Why is this even a issue when trying to find a mate? What if he didn't have a good mother? I never seen a man saying-"she must be real close to her mom"
Women and their odd dating requirements
I dont think its odd at all. Im a dude and I would NEVER EVER EVER get into a potentially serious relationship with a chick from a broken home or who was raised by a single mom. My reasonings are mine, just never did it and its worked out very very well for me. Those "raised by single mom" chicks all have relationship trouble or have become single moms themselves.
While I do not subscribe to the chicks thoughts of "Oh girlfriend, how he treats his mother will be a direct reflection of how he treats you.....blah blah blah", but I do think that its important that they have "relationship role models" that they grew up with/around because it (IMO) seems to make them better at relationships.
As funny as it sounds, it's a very valid concern. I wouldn't go out with a girl who has a poor relationship with her father or if the father is non-existent.
See quote below:
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Originally Posted by lilamx
I've seen lots of people that didn't have one or both parents turn out perfectly fine and become successful adults. Not everyone grows up with issues. After a certain age, they realize that they've become adults and can own their own lifes and make their own decisions, and not use the "I didn't have a mom or dad and therefore I'm this way" excuse as a crutch or way to form pity upon themselves.
I had a very convoluted childhood which I thought was perfectly normal until I left home at 16 and went to work in London, started meeting people who had "normal" family lives and started to realize how "different" and quite "abnormal" mine had been. I made so many mistakes in the ensuing years because my emotional compass was so off-base and I blamed my mother for those mistakes.
Certainly not unjustifiably so but after I moved to the US and in a long transAtlantic telephone conversation with one of my older brothers he hit the nail on the head when he said, "Without question we have a peculiarly rotten mother but you're an adult now. YOU are now responsible for YOURSELF and as much as I agree with you, the mistakes you make now are yours and yours alone as are the choices you make." He was absolutely right.
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Originally Posted by WakaFlocka
Because more often than not, they have issues. My parents were never around as a kid. My grandparents did more than they did. I was lucky to have them. I'd probably be in jail or dead had my grandparents not stepped in.
Sadly, both passed away 18 months apart. The final straw with my parents was when they refused to ship my pool table to New York. I had to drive 20 hours to Florida, take it apart, load it into the van, and drive back. I won't be talking to them anymore.
You were fortunate to have grandparents who fulfilled the parental roles which your parents were unable to deliver. But to cease all communication with them because of the shipping of a POOL TABLE? I'm thinking you're quite young.
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Originally Posted by fleetiebelle
Yeah, it's better to stop seeing her because she doesn't wear sandals.
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Originally Posted by TVandSportsGuy
You mean not making an effort to look nice for a date
Grasshopper, your list of Do's and Don'ts where dating is concerned is so filled with so many rules and regulations and replete with such a misogynistic bent that it's no wonder you have so many relationship/dating issues at 36 years old.
I thought courtesy of CD mods that you had your own "dating thread" for all these observations and questions?
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