Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Men tend to want sex right off the bat. Women want to wait longer. Yes, I know there are exceptions to this. I said "tend to" I didn't say "ALWAYS". It is important for anyone who reads this post to use good reading comprehension. And yes, I know the opposite can sometimes be true, that some women can want sex right away and some men can want to wait. And yes, I know it's not PC to say that the two genders are different in any way. But I just don't care about the consequences of what I said.
And in my experience, it was a very rare man who didn't expect sex on first real date.
Wow, were these men in their 20's. Even then, I never expected sex on the first date. Only time that happened was on rare occasions where I had a ONS, but that's not the norm for me nor my objective. As I get older, I become way more patient because I know the consequences of having sex too soon. But maybe I'm an exception, idk.
Yeah, well, one can probably blame neo-feminism and feminist indoctrination to a degree for men that being as masculine or whatever as women prefer. This is because Neo feminism expects mean to downplay their primal natures. Funny thing about that is, when men follow the footsteps of the feminist ideology of what a man is supposed to be, they are considered beta males, so-called nice guys, etc. that probably end up in a woman’s friend zone (if that) because they simply don’t get a lot of women’s juices flowing. Go figure.
I have to agree with ThisTown for a different reason. There's a lot of guys that use this forum that struggle with dating because they are shy and insecure around people. I never understood how talking about rape and murder will make these guys feel more confident and secure around women if they're worried about making women uncomfortable. It's just going to make people scared. I remember some thread where this guy became really passive around women because he did not want to create a hostile environment for women.
Some guys are afraid of putting themselves out there in front of women because they had really negative experiences when they try to stand out like getting criticized by family or peers ostracizing them because the guys were a little too different. So how is he supposed to go to some group event and have fun if he is worried that he might say something that might make people uncomfortable? How about telling guys like the OP advice about how to build rapport and waiting for the right moment to set up a date? A lot of insecure guys need to be advised not to be afraid to make a mistake.
Does anyone really think that a guy can build rapport with a women by talking about how other guys contribute to a hostile environment for women? I don't think it's a good idea for a guy to talk about Candy Laird on a first date with a woman.
Well said. I sort of relate to your first 2 paragraphs. Though I would never discuss rape culture or anything that serious with someone I just met. But I have always been shy and "in my head" around attractive women. I've gotten better, but dang what a challenge it has been. Still, I will not approach in a grocery store, gym, church, etc. Just hard to know if a woman will be open for an approach. In the gym they definitely are not open to it.
Well in scholary work, its the combination of equal rights ala second wave feminism combined with a celebration of femininity. Aka, women being feminine is glorious, but hell yeah, I'm not a second class citizen just because I am feminine.
Not sure what the poster meant by it.
Sure. My ex-wife self identified as either a neo-feminist or a third wave feminist, depending upon her mood and the topic under discussion.
However, it wasn’t hard to get her into bed.
I still wonder what Ray Nathan thinks feminists or neo-feminists are and how the tag relates to his lack of female attention.
Sure. My ex-wife self identified as either a neo-feminist or a third wave feminist, depending upon her mood and the topic under discussion.
However, it wasn’t hard to get her into bed.
I still wonder what Ray Nathan thinks feminists or neo-feminists are and how the tag relates to his lack of female attention.
Yeah, I agree. I don't think those are related to his specific lack of female attention. I think women like that aren't interested in many men in general even though they may "identify" as straight. But who knows. Its the toxic feminism that bothers me. I mean if we're going to talk about "toxic masculinity" which I think is a small minority, might as well talk about the other side.
Yeah, I agree. I don't think those are related to his specific lack of female attention. I think women like that aren't interested in many men in general even though they may "identify" as straight. But who knows. Its the toxic feminism that bothers me. I mean if we're going to talk about "toxic masculinity" which I think is a small minority, might as well talk about the other side.
I disagree.
I dispute the existence, in any significant way, of “toxic feminism”. Many of the women I know are feminists, and straight, and are very interested in men.
However, this is a distraction from the thread, so let’s agree to leave it with our respective posts and move on.
I dispute the existence, in any significant way, of “toxic feminism”. Many of the women I know are feminists, and straight, and are very interested in men.
However, this is a distraction from the thread, so let’s agree to leave it with our respective posts and move on.
I think there can be "toxic" anything.
I also think when you start blaming whole sections of people for your lack of dating success, probably the next step should be a mirror.
__________________ ____________________________________________
My posts as a Mod will always be in red.
Be sure to review Terms of Service: TOS
And check this out: FAQ
Moderator: Relationships Forum / Hawaii Forum / Dogs / Pets / Current Events
I dispute the existence, in any significant way, of “toxic feminism”. Many of the women I know are feminists, and straight, and are very interested in men.
However, this is a distraction from the thread, so let’s agree to leave it with our respective posts and move on.
OK, not worth it to me to debate. I'm not well equipped to discuss the ins and outs of feminism anyway. So back to his post, I do agree with him that men have it so much harder when it comes to dating than women do. I know, this is generally speaking and there's plenty of exceptions. Sure, rich male celebrities don't have it harder (other than being paranoid about being used for their status I guess), but normal men do.
Yes, I would NEVER call a man who gave me his number. Giving me your number means you are only half-interested, and I will have to chase you. Ive had plenty of men hand me their number, and I've never called any of them. I'm 41, so we are talking about a long dating history. Next time, ask her for her number and call her yourself.
Hmm. My wife told me that by giving her my number when we first met, it meant I was giving her the power to contact me if she was interested, rather than forcing her to wait until I "called her maybe" if I were interested. It impressed and intrigued her about me.
My daughter agrees that the person giving the number is the one permitting vulnerability...which is why it usually goes the other way: Men usually expect the woman to make herself vulnerable to him.
Seems like some women aren't going to let a man win no matter what he does.
Hmm. My wife told me that by giving her my number when we first met, it meant I was giving her the power to contact me if she was interested, rather than forcing her to wait until I "called her maybe" if I were interested. It impressed and intrigued her about me.
My daughter agrees that the person giving the number is the one permitting vulnerability...which is why it usually goes the other way: Men usually expect the woman to make herself vulnerable to him.
Seems like some women aren't going to let a man win no matter what he does.
I don't know if it's about winning or losing, except perhaps considering it a win if someone like the poster you quoted didn't call me. Not that she's a bad person based on that limited if rigid expectations she has, but if she's that rigid about who makes a phone call and what it means, I'm almost certainly going to have a stroke by the second or third date.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
