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That may have been me who took you on the walking tour, did you not notice my fractured Franglais accent? French people are quite hospitable, despite what Brits would have you believe, it works wonders when you have a handle on the language.
Maybe the American women who were a tad cautious with me weren’t being “standoffish”, perhaps I had a little Ted Bundy lookalike thing going on at the time!
This is what I keep telling people! And that's true pretty much anywhere in the world, not just in France.
J-F, I hate to tell you, but ... American women generally aren't used to taxi drivers flirting with them, and many wouldn't be comfortable with that. And we're the ones who supposedly don't have a rigid class system. But still...it just isn't done. And there definitely are safety concerns. Sorry. Although, if you were to cross paths with the some of the same women in a museum or bookstore, say, and chat them up, that could work; it wouldn't matter for some, that you were a taxi driver.
Congratulations on your marital happiness, though.
If it sounded like I thought that American women were a challenge, that wasn’t what I meant.
I meant that while it wasn’t hard for me to get English, Dutch, and French women into conversation, and just light heartedly talk about life, the beaches of Greece or Morocco, did we prefer Calvados or Armagnac, while kicking back, nursing Napoleon brandy and coffee on a restaurant rooftop, American women, (certainly not all of them), seemed to be initially resistant to small talk, as if it were some kind of trap.
I certainly didn’t mean that European women were easy, while American women were difficult. I found that European women were easier to talk to, they were open to relaxing conversation, while American women, (once again, certainly not all), were slow to lower the barriers, treating any sincere compliment as a predatory approach, to be swatted down, rather than happily received.
The thing is, no matter which side of the pond they’re from, all women are beautiful to me, especially the red headed nut case for whom I’ve fixed her favourite chilli-con-carne and jasmine rice tonight, and put a bottle of Viognier on ice.
I don't know. You might have been dealing with American women that have been "burned" and so they are a little bit cautious. That said, I have come across European women and the ones I came across were quite friendly.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sassybluesy
Well, only the CHADS get sex on command, because we only fall for Chads.
Even better, "Chad" can do and say anything he wants and not be creepy because he has a good jawline. He can follow you around like a weirdo and it will be cute, endearing, because he's...Chad.
Quote:
Originally Posted by mlj1225
And only the Chads that are 6 feet tall, drive a fancy car, have a fat bank account, and pay for everything.
Cause we're entitled like that
If Chad is 6 feet tall, he doesn't need a car. His jawline will get him around.
Quote:
Originally Posted by moongirl00
Its interesting you say this. I have heard the opposite, which is that English and Canadians are unapproachable while Americans tend to be chit chatty people, randomly striking up conversations with the person in line behind them at the grocery store, type thing, and I have found this to be true.
That said, Im an American who has traveled to France many many times and found the number of people approaching me was more than Im used to. The men there were quite aggressive, more so than I am used to in the states which can be an aggressive place too.
I was usually open to being approached though, while on vacation. One French man took me on a walking tour of Paris, some hidden areas behind the Louvre, told me some history, things like that. I appreciated it. Another day a Peruvian man living there invited me for a beer and I went. I found French people to be pretty hospitable, not like the stereotype at all which is that they are unfriendly and snobbish.
Im surprised to hear those American women were standoffish.
I've learned over and over that the only way to know how a certain person or place or whatever is is to experience it for yourself. I've been to areas that people have said is very snobby and have been treated with a lot of friendliness. In fact, the people who were trying to keep me away from that area were the snobs anyway. There's likely more to the story for people who want to badmouth people/areas/ etc.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jean-Francois
That may have been me who took you on the walking tour, did you not notice my fractured Franglais accent?
French people are quite hospitable, despite what Brits would have you believe, it works wonders when you have a handle on the language.
Maybe the American women who were a tad cautious with me weren’t being “standoffish”, perhaps I had a little Ted Bundy lookalike thing going on at the time!
Or maybe you just came across some Americans who happened to be standoffish.
Last edited by TJenkins602; 01-30-2020 at 06:25 PM..
This is what I keep telling people! And that's true pretty much anywhere in the world, not just in France.
J-F, I hate to tell you, but ... American women generally aren't used to taxi drivers flirting with them, and many wouldn't be comfortable with that. And we're the ones who supposedly don't have a rigid class system. But still...it just isn't done. And there definitely are safety concerns. Sorry. Although, if you were to cross paths with the some of the same women in a museum or bookstore, say, and chat them up, that could work; it wouldn't matter for some, that you were a taxi driver.
Congratulations on your marital happiness, though.
I think that I can understand it when you say that American women aren’t used to taxi drivers flirting with them Ruth.
Taxi drivers from most countries, on TV and in books and movies are portrayed as from the lower echelons of society, monosyllabic, not well educated, pretty much a peon who came over in the last wave of migrants, and who will get you from A to B.
Black Cab drivers in London don’t fit that stereotype, we’re certainly not all college graduates, although there are one or two that I’ve met.
Traditionally we’re confident, outspoken, if not well spoken, and au fait with politics and world events, and not afraid to discuss politics, (if asked our opinion).
We’re gregarious, and can quietly join in conversations about most things, but won’t ram our opinions down others throats, conversely most of us are interested in the opinions of others, even if only to point out where they have got it wrong!
The fact that I’m reasonably well educated, an avid reader of newspapers and magazines, and possess a large vocabulary, (my father scoured Readers Digest for words he was unsure of, and made me learn them), allows me to very easily slide into a simple conversation with women, or anyone, and as I never came across as threatening to anyone, most women were happy to talk with me.
You don’t have to be a rocket scientist to parlay that into a bottle of Merlot, and two glasses, n’est-ce pas?
Thanks for the marital congrats, my Nicky deserves the Medal of Hono(u)r for putting up with me, but I’m eternally grateful that she does
Taxi drivers from most countries, on TV and in books and movies are portrayed as from the lower echelons of society, monosyllabic, not well educated, pretty much a peon who came over in the last wave of migrants, and who will get you from A to B.)
I am aware that cab drivers in some countries earn more money than doctors do. Some of these cab drivers are well educated but driving a cab pays more, than what they could do with their degree.
At least it was that way in the days before Uber and Lyft.
I think that I can understand it when you say that American women aren’t used to taxi drivers flirting with them Ruth.
Taxi drivers from most countries, on TV and in books and movies are portrayed as from the lower echelons of society, monosyllabic, not well educated, pretty much a peon who came over in the last wave of migrants, and who will get you from A to B.
Black Cab drivers in London don’t fit that stereotype, we’re certainly not all college graduates, although there are one or two that I’ve met.
Traditionally we’re confident, outspoken, if not well spoken, and au fait with politics and world events, and not afraid to discuss politics, (if asked our opinion).
We’re gregarious, and can quietly join in conversations about most things, but won’t ram our opinions down others throats, conversely most of us are interested in the opinions of others, even if only to point out where they have got it wrong!
The fact that I’m reasonably well educated, an avid reader of newspapers and magazines, and possess a large vocabulary, (my father scoured Readers Digest for words he was unsure of, and made me learn them), allows me to very easily slide into a simple conversation with women, or anyone, and as I never came across as threatening to anyone, most women were happy to talk with me.
You don’t have to be a rocket scientist to parlay that into a bottle of Merlot, and two glasses, n’est-ce pas?
Thanks for the marital congrats, my Nicky deserves the Medal of Hono(u)r for putting up with me, but I’m eternally grateful that she does
It's not just that. It's considered unethical and improper for service workers to try to get personal with their customers, and many businesses forbid it. With car service drivers, that's important, because women are at a disadvantage in that situation. The driver could veer off course and take them anywhere, and anything could happen. There have been rare cases of this with taxicabs, but with the new "casual" drive services like Uber, the number of criminal incidents has skyrocketed.
And yes, I get that you're educated and are a good conversationalist. Thank heaven that someone in the West has preserved the art of conversation! I usually have to go to Russia to get that. As I said earlier, if you were to meet American women in some social context, some wouldn't have any qualms about the fact that you were a taxi driver. The venue would be appropriate. Using one's customers as one's dating pool is generally frowned on, though. Although I'm sure occasionally even in the US matches do happen that way.
And some cab drivers in the US are chatty, and are interesting to talk to. If they're not chatty, one can get some of them to open up. I've had some very pleasant conversations with some of the Muslim drivers in my former location. One was very curious about Buddhism, after I explained where the Buddhist monastery in town was, that I was going to. We had a great discussion about Buddhism. Generally, they enjoy spiritual topics. Taxi drivers in the US tend to take their cue from the passenger; if the passenger offers a conversation topic (a polite one), they'll participate. Most, I think, are conscious of the fact that there's a sort of boundary between the customer and the driver, and they respect that, so they let the passenger set the tone.
What you're doing, J-F, if you don't mind my saying so, is crossing a boundary. Apparently it works for you, and apparently the ethos relating to this is different in Europe. That's great. But maybe now you understand a bit better, why American women were different with you. And what about American men? Were they more gregarious? They have fewer safety issues to be concerned with; that's a major factor.
I just want to point out regarding the question of "American women" being this or that... America is a big place. In case it's been forgotten. I think it's laughable to judge the friendliness of American women of the south or the west or the central plains, etc, by what someone encountered in NY and NJ.
I've said this before here, but... I've moved around, lived in Virginia, Ohio, Iowa, Washington state, and Colorado. In VA, I was in the DC metro sprawl of northern VA, and that whole region rates very low in what I call "casual friendliness." The people in cities in the east tend to be less friendly with strangers, and they pride themselves on being "real" or "brutally honest" and scorn those who would wish a stranger a nice day as "fake." It's not absolute, but it's a thing. It's enough of a thing that if you are used to it, and then you go to the south or midwest or western regions of the country, somewhere that people are nicer, you will notice the strangers smiling at you and it will feel awkward and odd until you get used to it. I caught myself thinking, "The -bleep- are you lookin' at?" a number of times before I got used to people at fast food restaurants and gas stations smiling and being friendly to me in Iowa. (The rust belt cities like in Ohio might not be quite as cold but they aren't socially warm, either.)
I find it odd that people talk about "the Seattle Freeze" and folks being socially cold in the PNW because that wasn't my experience up there at all. I found people to be very, very casually friendly. It was getting into the deeper layers beyond the small talk and making true connection with anybody up there that I had no luck with. I ran into a disappointing number of "fake" people who would act like they were your best friend, but stab you in the back. I've known people who came to CO from CA (a common migration) who have said similar of the CA coastal cities' inhabitants.
The way I understand the concept, yes, they're one and the same. LOLOL
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