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Old 10-06-2011, 03:54 PM
 
Location: San Antonio, Texas
782 posts, read 1,111,178 times
Reputation: 3173

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This has been going on for you since August..and I seem to remember someone telling you THEN that the last thing you should do is get pregnant..It seems that back then you couldn't get him to stay home.. AND...back then what you wanted to know about was your right to support..as in money...and yes, there was the affair. You also wanted to drag his Chain of Command into the mess even tho there was nothing substantive his CO or 1st Sgt could really do. You were practically begged not to do that because it would make YOU look bad...but you did it anyway..And now she is preggers and you are too??? And he wants her to get an abortion and divorce you so he won't get in trouble...He was a loser then and he is a loser now...but your choices too are, shall we say, questionable?? In the meantime what have you done for yourself except come on here and air your dirty laundry??? Have you consulted an attorney as you were advised? Are you on the lease to the apartment yet? Do you have a reliable means of transportation yet? Do you have a job yet? Have you looked into going back to school yet?? What have you done to look out for yourself and your other child..and now the one on the way??
You need to get it together sister and quick because he could be looking at a court martial, especially with all the dust you have been kicking up on the matter. It was said then and I will say it now...If he didn't support you while he was active duty he sure as hell won't if he is a civillian.
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Old 10-06-2011, 04:04 PM
 
8,679 posts, read 15,296,767 times
Reputation: 15342
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chanygirl View Post
This has been going on for you since August..and I seem to remember someone telling you THEN that the last thing you should do is get pregnant..It seems that back then you couldn't get him to stay home.. AND...back then what you wanted to know about was your right to support..as in money...and yes, there was the affair. You also wanted to drag his Chain of Command into the mess even tho there was nothing substantive his CO or 1st Sgt could really do. You were practically begged not to do that because it would make YOU look bad...but you did it anyway..And now she is preggers and you are too??? And he wants her to get an abortion and divorce you so he won't get in trouble...He was a loser then and he is a loser now...but your choices too are, shall we say, questionable?? In the meantime what have you done for yourself except come on here and air your dirty laundry??? Have you consulted an attorney as you were advised? Are you on the lease to the apartment yet? Do you have a reliable means of transportation yet? Do you have a job yet? Have you looked into going back to school yet?? What have you done to look out for yourself and your other child..and now the one on the way??
You need to get it together sister and quick because he could be looking at a court martial, especially with all the dust you have been kicking up on the matter. It was said then and I will say it now...If he didn't support you while he was active duty he sure as hell won't if he is a civillian.
This is why some people should be forcibly put on implantable birth control and have to obtain a license to come off it and breed.

Seriously. OP, if you were smart, you would have an abortion, divorce this loser, and see a shrink to help you through the clusterfk that you've made of your life and the life of an innocent two-year-old. After reading your other threads and posts, I question your suitability for parenthood, and you would be doing your two-year-old a great service by letting your parents or someone else care for the child until you grow up, yourself.
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Old 10-06-2011, 04:25 PM
 
Location: U.S.A.
19,787 posts, read 20,380,882 times
Reputation: 29181
Quote:
Originally Posted by pimpy View Post
lol and :script:
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Old 10-06-2011, 05:18 PM
 
27,955 posts, read 39,890,288 times
Reputation: 26197
If, and this is a big if, this is true it would be high time to jump ship. I know, wrong branch of the military.

I have my doubts on this whole thing or all parties are equally screwed up.
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Old 10-06-2011, 05:32 PM
 
11 posts, read 15,736 times
Reputation: 13
WOW. First off I'm sorry that this is happening... Choices were made, right or wrong- now the consequences have to be faced. I'm not sure how the Army does it but in other branches HE can get into trouble for having an affair gets Article 15s and/or get kicked out! He has asked you for a divorce, why on earth would you want to stay married to someone that has done so much to you and proves to you that he doesn't want to be there? Why would you want to be with someone who blatantly asked someone to murder his child to cover his butt? I know that some people are like "but I love him"... but you should love your child(ren) and yourself MORE! Do you ever think about what its doing to them? Are you teaching them this is an ok way to be treated??? Take a breather, get it together and take care of YOU and yours... DON"T depend on him to do it because he has proven he doesn't want to. Don't make yourself a victim... make yourself stronger!
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Old 10-06-2011, 05:37 PM
 
Location: Middle of the valley
48,625 posts, read 35,086,908 times
Reputation: 74026
Three weeks is very early for hcg (or whatever that hormone is), you would have to taking pregnancy tests to even know because you haven't even missed a period... why were you doing that?

Also, he is already in trouble because you reported him to the commander, I guess pregnant may make it worse - but divorce you?!
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Old 10-06-2011, 05:48 PM
 
Location: Way up high
22,423 posts, read 29,585,819 times
Reputation: 31606
Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa View Post
Three weeks pregnant? Come on now. Pregnancy dating starts from the first day of the last period, e.g. 2 weeks before ovulation. So 3 weeks is just one week post fertilization, and likely the egg has not implanted yet. There is no missed period and no symptoms. Few tests can pick up HCG levels that quickly.

Moderator cut: Personal attack
I beg to differ..You can definately tell when you're prego that early

Last edited by bmwguydc; 10-06-2011 at 09:38 PM.. Reason: Edited quoted text
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Old 10-06-2011, 05:53 PM
 
5,544 posts, read 8,341,536 times
Reputation: 11141
i am sorry for your pain. What should he do: Grow up and be a man. What should you do: your call, but you do have options. Stay, go, or ride it out for now then decide. It is hard to be in your situation.

just find out what resources you have with him or without him. then decide. if you have family, now would be a good time to ping them.
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Old 10-06-2011, 06:12 PM
 
Location: Arizona
1,204 posts, read 2,532,681 times
Reputation: 1551
Quote:
Originally Posted by DBMommy View Post
im 4 weeks pregnant and my husband is in the army, recently in august he got counseled for a rumored affair with a single soldier. But shes still been contacting him everyday, still trying to hold a relationship with him knowing that he's a married man, with hopes that he will leave me. Ive already spoke with his 1st sergeant in september about her still calling my husband and having an affair with him still. ans now september 27 i found out i was 3weeks pregnant, i put it on my fb, and she had her friends friend request me, and now she's saying she's pregnant 10 weeks pregnant n she just found out on the 25th, My husband started ignoring her advances she wanted to have sex with him and she pulled the why are you ignoring me im pregnant card. What should i do, what should he do, he say's he told her if she really is then she needs to get an abortion or the both of them could get into really big trouble. Ive done nothing but love my husband and he says the only way he sees it so that he wont get into trouble is to divorce me while im pregnant.
Perhaps he should have though about getting in trouble before he had an affair, so as far as I'm concerned he gets what he deserves. You on the other hand don't deserve a cheater as a husband or a father. I know it's easier said than done, but is this the type of person you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Also, can't you report her to her supervisor for harrassment?
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Old 10-06-2011, 06:15 PM
 
Location: Arizona
1,204 posts, read 2,532,681 times
Reputation: 1551
Quote:
Originally Posted by himain View Post
I beg to differ..You can definately tell when you're prego that early
I agree. I noticed weird veins going up the side of my leg and in other places. I had an IUI and it had only been two since the procedure, and my pregnancy test was positive, actually 5 of them were positive.
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