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One of my dearest friends is still a FINE looking man. He always has been (dang him anyway) since we were teenagers, and always attracted both men and women, of all ages; when you look up "man-w***e", his picture is in the dictionary. He has had both men and women, of all legal ages. For the past 11 years he has been married to a tough, squat "intense" (for want of a better word) woman, whom he loves to distraction, whom he would do (and has done) anything for. She knows his history, and she just smiles when they go out and women and men throw themselves at her hubby! She knows who he's going home with! Either you trust someone or you don't... He has never cheated on her, and won't, with either sex.
Haven't read any other replies, so this is probably a repeat of someone else's !
If it happened SINCE you got together, it's your business.
If it happened BEFORE you met, then it's not.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ron.
This Perfect guy that you've been with for 7 months reveals to you.........he's slept with 3 men prior to meeting you. And yes, you've "slept" with him.
what would you do?
Please don't think this cannot happen, this is a real situation, somewhere in America.
I'm bi so it would be hypocritical, or absurd, of me to disapprove. I'd be perfectly okay with it, to be honest.
I suppose that, since I've always thought that two men together (even just cuddling) is something beautiful and sexy, I'd even want to know the whole story lol.
Be aware that this poster is speaking from the perspective of a bisexual male, so in his mind it is rational to say that a woman could never fully satisfy a man*
*like him.
That said, I believe that bisexuality is a real orientation and that these folks get a very raw deal indeed. They have a hard time gaining the trust of a partner (man or woman) because there is always this expectation that a bisexual individual will never be completely happy or satisfied in a monogamous relationship. Of course that is bull****.
When one of my ex-boyfriends came out to me, I was glad he told me before we went any further. He was very honest and told me and answered all my questions. We were just friends then.I was attracted to him and felt bummed that he was only into guys and not women. I thought he was very hot. But then he surprised me by telling me that he liked me. I did not care he was gay. He liked me- a woman. Finder's keepers.
Call me controversial, but I believe that on a very basic level, we're ALL bisexual.
For a man, if you rub it, magic happens.
(to any of the guys out there who are revolted by this, and are thinking "Not me", if you've ever had any kind of examination down there, by either male or female doctor/nurse, and had to sit and think to your manhood "don't you DARE !! ", then that shows that our minds and bodies can operate seperately.)
Same for the ladies if certain parts are attended to.
To our bodies, it matters not who, or what it is which does this, it only matters to our minds.
Hence why I think it's not uncommon to hear of teens being "confused" about their sexuality.
After all, it's more than possible for magic to happen even if we are asleep, with no physical stimulation. It could be argued that the physical stimulation puts us in such a mental state where we are able to achieve orgasm.
I don't believe that "gay", or "straight" are anything more than a preference.
Where we learn that preference comes from a variety of areas, role models, peer pressure, societal values etc
This might not be the thread to open up that discussion tho, back to our topic...............................
Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa
Be aware that this poster is speaking from the perspective of a bisexual male, so in his mind it is rational to say that a woman could never fully satisfy a man*
*like him.
That said, I believe that bisexuality is a real orientation and that these folks get a very raw deal indeed. They have a hard time gaining the trust of a partner (man or woman) because there is always this expectation that a bisexual individual will never be completely happy or satisfied in a monogamous relationship. Of course that is bull****.
This Perfect guy that you've been with for 7 months reveals to you.........he's slept with 3 men prior to meeting you. And yes, you've "slept" with him.
Call me controversial, but I believe that on a very basic level, we're ALL bisexual.
For a man, if you rub it, magic happens.
(to any of the guys out there who are revolted by this, and are thinking "Not me", if you've ever had any kind of examination down there, by either male or female doctor/nurse, and had to sit and think to your manhood "don't you DARE !! ", then that shows that our minds and bodies can operate seperately.) Same for the ladies if certain parts are attended to.
To our bodies, it matters not who, or what it is which does this, it only matters to our minds.
Hence why I think it's not uncommon to hear of teens being "confused" about their sexuality.
After all, it's more than possible for magic to happen even if we are asleep, with no physical stimulation. It could be argued that the physical stimulation puts us in such a mental state where we are able to achieve orgasm.
I don't believe that "gay", or "straight" are anything more than a preference.
Where we learn that preference comes from a variety of areas, role models, peer pressure, societal values etc
This might not be the thread to open up that discussion tho, back to our topic...............................
TOTALLY disagree. I'm a woman, that has had "her parts attended to" for many years. I assure you there was never EVER any worries or thoughts or leanings of any sort of "stimulation". No way. Totally different mentalities between men and women, I guess...but absolutely, you got this one wrong.
TOTALLY disagree. I'm a woman, that has had "her parts attended to" for many years. I assure you there was never EVER any worries or thoughts or leanings of any sort of "stimulation". No way. Totally different mentalities between men and women, I guess...but absolutely, you got this one wrong.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
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I get the 'might be gay card'. If he's stuck with you for 7 months he's probably bi, not gay. Unless he was pressured into the relationship/marriage for religious reasons.
But the AIDS card...newsflash, he can get STD's from women too...and if it's in the past, it's already happened, right? AID's isn't confined to the gay community anyway. Yet alot of women WOULD be perfectly fine if he'd had 100 female partners or something before.
I think one of the main reason is that society is still uncomfortable with the idea of bi men. Bi women aren't as threatening to the straight mode of thinking, but bi men are really threatening. They like to consign male homosexuality to the gay community, when I know from personal experience alot of men are bi and don't want to admit it. Often for the very reasons displayed in these posts. Such often are told to 'choose a side' and then try to minimise their attraction to the sex they are not supposed to like.
But the bottom line for me was that he was honest upfront...maybe you had no reason to ask or suspect and he didn't think it was that important, since it was in the past.
The issue this raises is, this seems to cut down the opportunities for geniunely bisexual men to have a relationship with a woman. Not even that, but even men who forever reason may have had sex with men once or a few times in the past, and is really dedicated to a life of monogamy with a female partner. Does that one act brand him for the rest of his life, even if he decides to, and is capable, of 'going straight' for you?
Last edited by Trimac20; 10-20-2011 at 05:45 AM..
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", then that shows that our minds and bodies can operate seperately.)
