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The thing is, Stop Looking!! Women dont want to be treated as an object, or a 'prize' that you have won, when you pick one up, sheesh!
They are looking for someone to be a friend to them...
Remember, after the sex is gone, if your not friends, then you both will go your seperate ways, because you simply have nothing in common!
You are approaching this as a 'game'... Thats the 'worse' attitude you can have!
I have women who my Wife says has a crush on me, or want to take me home with them, instead of thier husbands, simply because Im easy to talk to, and I know a little about every subject to 'be' interesting. LOL, even being partially disabled, I atract them, becaue of my 'can do' attitude, and I try and keep a positive attitude about everything, (OK, Im allowed to be 'down' on certain things, but, thats because I have an opinion, and if I can respect yours, then I expect you to respect mine).
Try to get to know the women through friends, not just by approaching them and asking them out... Naturally, they know you want them for sex and thats it. All women want a relationship, not just a roust in the hay.. (OK there are exceptions to everything ).
The more outgoing, and friendly you become, and stop trying to 'score' with them, they will respect you more, because they know, by your actions and words that you respect them as the wonderful human beings they are
I wish you well...
Jesse
I agree with most of this post, with the small exception of the bolded portion above It is certainly possible for a man, when he is romantically interested in a woman, to be interested in much more than just raw physical intimacy. A man can definitely also want to be loved, cared for, and treated with gentleness, loving kindness, and sweet tender affection, much as ppl might typically associate with a woman as wanting in a romantic relationship.
Remember: men *are* capable of being nurturing and loving to women in a G-/PG-rated manner, not just in an X-rated way (Men have feelings too! )
Last edited by Phoenix2017; 11-18-2011 at 02:07 PM..
Reason: Adds
well...it's evident that the problem is me....but to be real ... I'm just a normal guy...I was always respectful, and honest... I really don't have game....maybe I'm not good looking enough........maybe I'm to boring ...I don't know......but I'm stopping because I wanna see this from a different perspective....and I'm trying to get some feedback if it's worth not approaching women...
Why don't you try learning how to relate, first, before you do anything else.
Just try siting and talking to a woman without trying to jam a ring on her finger and drag her down the aisle.
If you can't learn how to do that, I'm sure there's a monastery nearby you can join.
Also, this ....
Quote:
Originally Posted by Suncc49
Someone like you would be better served by meeting a woman through a hobby by which you share a common interest....
That way she won't see how nervous, awkward, and bitter you may appear. The true relaxed you will be revealed when you do this hobby together.
I suggest a meetup or gosocial active group
....is a good way to network and meet people who have similar interests.
Not to date....but to develop friendships, which sometimes turn into dating, or sometimes friends turn you on to others or you meet others through your friends.
Why don't you try learning how to relate, first, before you do anything else.
Just try siting and talking to a woman without trying to jam a ring on her finger and drag her down the aisle.
If you can't learn how to do that, I'm sure there's a monastery nearby you can join.
Also, this ....
....is a good way to network and meet people who have similar interests.
Not to date....but to develop friendships, which sometimes turn into dating, or sometimes friends turn you on to others or you meet others through your friends.
Assuming of course that the friends actually care enough about you, to want to assist you...they can always be apathetic to your plight, or fickle or fairweather-friends, also.
I found this out the hard way, when I tried repeatedly, to do just that...unless they're like bff-level friends to you or you have a really super-close relationship with them, chances are they're simply not gonna care enough to want to help you. At least in my own personal exp. in trying several times...
ETA: also if as a guy you become friends with a girl, the chances are very good that you're simply going to be seen as a friend forever and nothing more, after that.
Assuming of course that the friends actually care enough about you, to want to assist you...they can always be apathetic to your plight, or fickle or fairweather-friends, also.
I found this out the hard way, when I tried repeatedly, to do just that...unless they're like bff-level friends to you or you have a really super-close relationship with them, chances are they're simply not gonna care enough to want to help you. At least in my own personal exp. in trying several times...
If this is how your friends treat you, they're not really your friends.
Yes, you're right, there is a distinction. Still, how can anyone conclude from a single pic that the OP 'takes himself seriously'? Not saying that he DOESN'T but I would think that we would need to see him 'in action' before coming to that conclusion. Pictures simply do not do fair justice to anyone, IMO.
Didn't say what he does; said what it looked like to me. Outward perceptions, for all that we hear "it's what's inside", count and we all only get ONE shot at a first impression. One, uno, in the singular.
"I find it a little creepily desperate when someone takes a photo of themselves in a mirror to use as a profile pic."
1/2 the people on internet dating sites have the same self mirror pictures.
If that be true then maybe one might therefore extrapolate that half the people on dating sites are desperate.
OP, if you're getting rejected that much, it means that your standards are too high. I realize that everyone feels like they should have the best, but the fact of the matter is that people generally end up with those on the same level. What you need to do is honestly evaluate yourself in terms of looks, personality, and financial status and then aim to approach women who are on the same level. So, if you conclude that overall you're a 5, go after women in the 4 to 6 range. Once you start doing well with those women, you could branch out and start approaching women in the 4 to 7 range and keep it going from there.
However, if you're not willing to lower your standards, then elevate yourself so that you are now equal or above the women you're typically attracted to but haven't had success with. You could do this by working out a lot, staying in shape, making sure your hair is always done/cut, keeping good skin care, wearing decent clothes, improving your people skills, making more money, and by expanding your social circle.
Once you make these adjustments, you'll probably start getting some dates. Good luck.
How would you describe your looks? If you asking women out then you have game. You want to be a king not a pawn.
my looks...are no more than 5.5 or 6 on a good day.....and no ...I don't have game....no success no game.....and that's ok.....I just feel like I 'm falling behind this whole relationship scene...and I have no experience at all....and the longer it goes the harder it gets to come out of it....much like quicksand...the more you fight the more you drawn...some times remaining still is the best option...
OP, if you're getting rejected that much, it means that your standards are too high. I realize that everyone feels like they should have the best, but the fact of the matter is that people generally end up with those on the same level. What you need to do is honestly evaluate yourself in terms of looks, personality, and financial status and then aim to approach women who are on the same level. So, if you conclude that overall you're a 5, go after women in the 4 to 6 range. Once you start doing well with those women, you could branch out and start approaching women in the 4 to 7 range and keep it going from there.
However, if you're not willing to lower your standards, then elevate yourself so that you are now equal or above the women you're typically attracted to but haven't had success with. You could do this by working out a lot, staying in shape, making sure your hair is always done/cut, keeping good skin care, wearing decent clothes, improving your people skills, making more money, and by expanding your social circle.
Once you make these adjustments, you'll probably start getting some dates. Good luck.
thanks men...but my standards are not high at all.....I never approached princess looking gals...but one thing that I realized is that for some reason..at least for me...women that are not that great looking tend to be a lot more unappreciative in terms of responding to an approach...maybe they have trust issues or something...I don't know...
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).
(Men have feelings too! 
)
