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Old 04-11-2013, 09:00 AM
 
Location: Newport Beach, California
36,149 posts, read 23,795,715 times
Reputation: 14307

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Quote:
Originally Posted by boxercrew4 View Post
Honestly, right now after all this, I'm not sure what I want. My emotional needs aren't being met either. The only explanation he could offer when I brought up finding these posts is that something may have pissed him off and he vented on here. A few years worth of derogatory posts is more than just venting. When he met my son, he was a young kid and he didn't like him. His reason: he was hyper. Most 5-6 year old boys do roughneck. He wasn't hyper to the point where he required medical attention. My son tried to get along with him for the first few years and then gave up when he got only a negative response in return. He will not even address my son, he speaks through me and leaves the room when he walks in. I know my son wouldn't even consider attending counseling with us because he doesn't care anymore.
If he hates my child and feels like he was forced into marriage after being together for 2 years and stays out of guilt, then I don't need that. I also don't need to be thought of as a slacker. Believe me, being in constant pain isn't something you do for fun and I get less than half of what I did when I could work. Being on my own has to be better than being with someone who feels that way.
I understand. It is so sad. you and son deserve so much better, your son deserves to be raised in a more peaceful loving environment. I read several posts by your husband, I think maybe he was debating if he should leave. I might be the minority here, but I don't think he sounds like a total scumbag. Majority of his posts sound like "venting" to me. When people vent, they normally say things they don't mean.

I don't know, I can only speculate. Does your husband have other qualities that you desire in a mate? I've dated two single fathers, that is why I generally have a little bit sympathy towards other folks who are in relationship with single parents. There are no reasons under the sun to justify child abuse, please don't get me wrong. But sometimes, childless folks stuck in a "rock and a hard place" situation. If your husband "hated" your child, he wouldn't have chosen to marry you a single mother in the first place unless he had some hidden agenda.

I still wonder if it is possible to sit him down having a heart to heart conversation with him.

Good luck to you. You really do deserve a good man. I hope things work out.
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Old 04-11-2013, 09:05 AM
 
Location: Phila4Now
3,270 posts, read 3,607,460 times
Reputation: 1933
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilyflower3191981 View Post
I understand. It is so sad. you and son deserve so much better, your son deserves to be raised in a more peaceful loving environment. I read several posts by your husband, I think maybe he was debating if he should leave. I might be the minority here, but I don't think he sounds like a total scumbag. Majority of his posts sound like "venting" to me. When people vent, they normally say things they don't mean.

I don't know, I can only speculate. Does your husband have other qualities that you desire in a mate? I've dated two single fathers, that is why I generally have a little bit sympathy towards other folks who are in relationship with single parents. There are no reasons under the sun to justify child abuse, please don't get me wrong. But sometimes, childless folks stuck in a "rock and a hard place" situation. If your husband "hated" your child, he wouldn't have chosen to marry you a single mother in the first place unless he had some hidden agenda.
Maybe the husband tried to give it a fair shot from the beginning and saw the kid had no hope,sometimes that's just the way things are. Can't always get along with everyone in families.
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Old 04-11-2013, 10:36 AM
 
Location: NW Indiana
42,588 posts, read 17,463,404 times
Reputation: 109138
Thread closed at OP's request.
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