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True but then I go out of my way to put them at ease...cause I feel badly that they are so insecure.My daughter on the other hand is the total opposite she will go out of her way to torture some poor girl...funny how she can be so different.
True but then I go out of my way to put them at ease...cause I feel badly that they are so insecure.My daughter on the other hand is the total opposite she will go out of her way to torture some poor girl...funny how she can be so different.
I'm of your daughter's persuasion. Can't stand such women.
I never want any woman to feel threatend by me...what's the point afterall I am no threat to them?? Don't need the drama!
There's no drama on anybody's part, just reaction on theirs. Some get over it and realize there is no threat, others don't, which is fine by me too.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Irishiis49
True but then I go out of my way to put them at ease...cause I feel badly that they are so insecure.My daughter on the other hand is the total opposite she will go out of her way to torture some poor girl...funny how she can be so different.
I'm a kind person in general and always smiling. I do my best to put people at ease, but it's not my responsibility to ease the mind of every insecure woman.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Irishiis49
Too funny...I once told her that she was a real beotch and she said yea I am so what!!LOL
There's a difference between actively being a b*tch and others just feeling threatened by you because of the way you look/present yourself.
They don't want to shoot too high and risk rejection or take too much less than what they can get.
Where do people get this nonsense. No one "shoots" for anything...other that those immature boys that read books like "Get Laid Now!" and other such treasures. You meet someone, and often, the sparks just ignite...sometimes slowly, sometimes immediately. Honestly...rejection? That never even enters my mind. Why would it?
Quote:
Originally Posted by jobaba
But for you married people, doesn't that go away? I mean, let's assume you marry someone you LIKE, and really aren't thinking about cheating on. Let's assume he/she is attracted to you and would overlook minor fluctuations in weight throughout the years and is basically going to STAY attracted to you for the duration.
for all intensive purposes,
Did you really just type that? I mean...really?
Quote:
Originally Posted by jobaba
you are just trying to maintain the level of attractiveness you had when you met him/her. You are no longer worried about how good looking/ugly you are in the scheme of society (at least not regularly). Because theoretically, you should no longer care about attracting another person except for your mate.
Is this a pretty accurate depiction of being married?
EDIT: The question is not about looking good for your mate. Assume you are going to work out, stay slim and they will find you attractive forever. The question is about feeling attractive to other members of the opposite sex based on your god given looks. Why would you care anymore if you are married?
I stay fit for MY OWN HEALTH. And I like looking my best - I feel better. Good lord. How old are you?
I look good because I want my honey's friends to be jealous of him.
JK, although men do like to show off their woman, I don't care how "healthy" they are. It's important to maintain myself for him but more importantly I do it for me. I focus on my personal appearance because it's important to me. I want to make a good impression on people and I also feel better about myself when I have invested time (not a whole lot) in how I look. I know how to dress my body to look it's best, so I do it. I get my hair done regularly, I take care of my skin, ect... I do this because it's the only body I will have in this lifetime, why not utilize it to the best of it's ability? You're body will function better for you if you take care of it and love and nurture it.
Where do people get this nonsense. No one "shoots" for anything...other that those immature boys that read books like "Get Laid Now!" and other such treasures. You meet someone, and often, the sparks just ignite...sometimes slowly, sometimes immediately. Honestly...rejection? That never even enters my mind. Why would it?
Did you really just type that? I mean...really?
I stay fit for MY OWN HEALTH. And I like looking my best - I feel better. Good lord. How old are you?
How old are YOU? I looked at a couple of your posts and you're too old IMHO to be mocking and berating random people on the internet for asking for honest opinions on dating advice. Yea, I'm a little behind the game. There's also genuine 35 year old virgins out there. You gonna kick them in the stomach too?
Maybe for you, Cheerleader Sue, meeting the Captain of the football team under the bleachers and making out was how your sparks flew, but I have had to face rejection in my life. Sometimes sparks on my end are friendship on hers.
God, it's like people never went through rejection or had self esteem issues in the 1940s. Get off your high horse.
I think young people are no different today than ever before. Although they may dress for themself, there is a level of dress to impress or to attract which may carry on through their life or where it becomes less important over time. But I think everyone carries a level of wanting to be seen as attractive regardless of your marital status or age.
I have always enjoyed dressing well and good grooming. I'm married 23 years and I like when I walk into a room and my husband tells me that I look beautiful, or notices that I had my hair done, or am wearing a new outfit. I still get butterflies in my stomach when I look at him when he dresses for work or dresses casual. Good grooming and dressing well is something we personally enjoy. We also probably possess a certain level of vanity. I don't think there is anything wrong with that as it is personal.
Women have paid compliments to me about his dress, and men have complimented him to me. We don't dress fishing for compliments, but when given they are just an added bonus. I accept the compliment graciously. Don't tell me that no one likes a compliment.I have complimented women - those I know and strangers - on how nice they look.
I think when a woman thinks other women see her as a threat shows a level of insecurity about herself and has an opinion of herself that is bigger than the one people have around her. You can only be perceived as a threat if you act like you are a threat and can only be taken seriously by someone else who is insecure.
EDIT: The question is not about looking good for your mate. Assume you are going to work out, stay slim and they will find you attractive forever. The question is about feeling attractive to other members of the opposite sex based on your god given looks. Why would you care anymore if you are married?
You can't really separate them out. Being attractive at the same level will apply to the strangers and your mate.
You should always care. I don't get people who don't care. Not caring is the same as taking them for granted - grounds for divorce in my book.
First of all, I'm single and I've never been married. Throughout my single life, I've always been on a roller coaster ride of feeling attractive and unattractive, and trying to figure where I fit in general in society's 'totem pole' of physical attractiveness.
I reason other single people are similarly hung up about their looks. Because they want to find somebody they are attracted to and who is attracted to them. They don't want to shoot too high and risk rejection or take too much less than what they can get.
But for you married people, doesn't that go away? I mean, let's assume you marry someone you LIKE, and really aren't thinking about cheating on. Let's assume he/she is attracted to you and would overlook minor fluctuations in weight throughout the years and is basically going to STAY attracted to you for the duration.
You would still care about your looks. But, for all intensive purposes, you are just trying to maintain the level of attractiveness you had when you met him/her. You are no longer worried about how good looking/ugly you are in the scheme of society (at least not regularly). Because theoretically, you should no longer care about attracting another person except for your mate.
Is this a pretty accurate depiction of being married?
EDIT: The question is not about looking good for your mate. Assume you are going to work out, stay slim and they will find you attractive forever. The question is about feeling attractive to other members of the opposite sex based on your god given looks. Why would you care anymore if you are married?
I think it may be in a way in any LTR. Like its the stamp of "approved". LOL
But really I like to maintain because its just fun. When I see another girl that has something amazing on its something to talk about and find my own version of. Its not really about attracting mates. I just like pretty things and playing with visual compositions in clothing, body shape, makeup, hair.
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You meet someone, and often, the sparks just ignite...sometimes slowly, sometimes immediately. Honestly...rejection? That never even enters my mind. Why would it? 
