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My wife friended a guy that was on my friends list that I worked with, he is also married. They had met a few times when we were all out at happy hour. It was one of those cases where on her FB it suggested him as a friend, since we had several mutual friends (my wife was friends with several female friends that worked with as well). I didn't think anything of it. I really respected that he actually asked me if I minded him accepting the friend request. So it may be something as simple as it was suggested, so she sent it. Maybe your friend has talked to her about you and so she thought it would be good to get to know you. Some people just like to see how many friends they can have. There are multiple innocent reasons for her doing this.
So here is what happened. I have gone through different stages during the 3+ years I have been on facebook. First stage: and accept invitations from people I recognize even if we aren't close. Second stage: delete people on my list that I am not actually close to or related to (including coworkers I don't want in my business). Third stage: use facebook to stay in touch with family & friends, promote social causes, and play Cityville.
Cityville is a game my fiance introduced me to on Facebook. We both love it and play daily. In order to be successful at playing the game, you need lots of neighbors in your "city" but you first have to be friends with them on facebook. Facebook suggests friends for me who play cityville. I send friend requests and immediately add them to my "cityville" list, which restricts the amount of personal information they see to only what would show up in a google search. I have no interest in fellow gamers' personal lives nor they in mine. I was haphazardly adding people, trying to keep a game going and mistakenly friended someone who does not play cityville. She sent me an email asking if she knows me. When I tried to reply that I mistakenly sent her a friend request and to just ignore it, I found she had blocked me. I shrugged my shoulders and went on playing cityville.
The next day, my fiance asked me why I sent a friend request to his friend "Mary." Mind you, since the woman had blocked me, when I tried to click on her name I couldn't see her profile at all. I told him that I did get an email from Mary and explained the whole cityville mixup. Apparently, Mary not only blocked me but sent my fiance a 3-paragraph email saying she had received a friend request from his fiance (his facebook profile shows us as engaged) and that it was in poor taste and that she doesn't want any drama with his girlfriend. He wrote her back and told her that I was just looking for fellow cityville players and she responded that this seemed suspect as she does not play and if she did it would be clearly marked on her profile. She also said she would delete my fiance because she didn't want to be in any drama.
I told my fiance that I am not completely blameless because I should have paid more attention to who I was friending. However, I thought his friend's response was paranoid and definitely overkill. First of all, if I was looking for foul play, it wouldn't be through facebook since my SO and I are linked as being engaged. Second, her profile (which I saw later while looking over SOs shoulder), is linked to her husband's profile. Third, if she didn't want to accept my friend request, she didn't have to. The blocking and the longwinded email exchange were not necessary. Fourth, if I was really interested in finding out about her (which I am not), it would not be necessary to add her as a friend. Fifth, why did she assume there was drama? Perhaps she has had issues and assumes the worst.
My wife friended a guy that was on my friends list that I worked with, he is also married. They had met a few times when we were all out at happy hour. It was one of those cases where on her FB it suggested him as a friend, since we had several mutual friends (my wife was friends with several female friends that worked with as well). I didn't think anything of it. I really respected that he actually asked me if I minded him accepting the friend request. So it may be something as simple as it was suggested, so she sent it. Maybe your friend has talked to her about you and so she thought it would be good to get to know you. Some people just like to see how many friends they can have. There are multiple innocent reasons for her doing this.
Hi scocar, I thought the same way. Why she assumed I was out for some kind of drama, I don't know. I am in my mid-30s, fiance in his late 40s. We are mature, settled people. Not saying we are perfect and don't have problems, but gimme a break.
Same here. If its a friend of a friend then NO WAY do I accept. Period.
I operate from the viewpoint of "if I do not know you or havent met you we will not be friends on FB". Exceptions are sometimes made for people who are connected to a bunch of other people I know and they are in my Martial Arts circle.
I generally don't accept friend requests from people I don't know either. At least not until I started playing Cityville, and now I'm considering not playing any more because of this mixup.
I have denied friend requests from people I do know like former coworkers I don't want in my business or parents of kids I have taught, or even adult students. That is why I keep linkedin and facebook separate and have a separate facebook account for my business. But I have never blocked anyone. Would only do that if I was being stalked or something.
Hi scocar, I thought the same way. Why she assumed I was out for some kind of drama, I don't know. I am in my mid-30s, fiance in his late 40s. We are mature, settled people. Not saying we are perfect and don't have problems, but gimme a break.
Well, she certainly created some drama for not wanting any.
It was an honest mistake on your part, both you and your fiance explained the same story... I find it odd that she didn't believe either of you.
I recently sent a message to a childhood friend's wife, who I'd never met. I had written a couple of comments on a news article he posted, as did she. Essentially I wanted her to know who I was and that I wasn't hitting on her husband, though I didn't have to say it so directly. Turns out she knew my brother and everything was cool.
So here is what happened. I have gone through different stages during the 3+ years I have been on facebook. First stage: and accept invitations from people I recognize even if we aren't close. Second stage: delete people on my list that I am not actually close to or related to (including coworkers I don't want in my business). Third stage: use facebook to stay in touch with family & friends, promote social causes, and play Cityville.
Cityville is a game my fiance introduced me to on Facebook. We both love it and play daily. In order to be successful at playing the game, you need lots of neighbors in your "city" but you first have to be friends with them on facebook. Facebook suggests friends for me who play cityville. I send friend requests and immediately add them to my "cityville" list, which restricts the amount of personal information they see to only what would show up in a google search. I have no interest in fellow gamers' personal lives nor they in mine. I was haphazardly adding people, trying to keep a game going and mistakenly friended someone who does not play cityville. She sent me an email asking if she knows me. When I tried to reply that I mistakenly sent her a friend request and to just ignore it, I found she had blocked me. I shrugged my shoulders and went on playing cityville.
The next day, my fiance asked me why I sent a friend request to his friend "Mary." Mind you, since the woman had blocked me, when I tried to click on her name I couldn't see her profile at all. I told him that I did get an email from Mary and explained the whole cityville mixup. Apparently, Mary not only blocked me but sent my fiance a 3-paragraph email saying she had received a friend request from his fiance (his facebook profile shows us as engaged) and that it was in poor taste and that she doesn't want any drama with his girlfriend. He wrote her back and told her that I was just looking for fellow cityville players and she responded that this seemed suspect as she does not play and if she did it would be clearly marked on her profile. She also said she would delete my fiance because she didn't want to be in any drama.
I told my fiance that I am not completely blameless because I should have paid more attention to who I was friending. However, I thought his friend's response was paranoid and definitely overkill. First of all, if I was looking for foul play, it wouldn't be through facebook since my SO and I are linked as being engaged. Second, her profile (which I saw later while looking over SOs shoulder), is linked to her husband's profile. Third, if she didn't want to accept my friend request, she didn't have to. The blocking and the longwinded email exchange were not necessary. Fourth, if I was really interested in finding out about her (which I am not), it would not be necessary to add her as a friend. Fifth, why did she assume there was drama? Perhaps she has had issues and assumes the worst.
And that is why I stopped playing Mafia Wars, Vampire Wars, YoVille, Farmville and whatever other games I was playing. All she had to say was, "sorry, no, I don't play that game..wonder how it shows that I do.."...something like that. Sounds like she's the one into drama with that email she sent. Totally not cool and uncalled for. Some people take FB way too seriously. I am like you. In the beginning I had friend requests left and right. Then I got to the "cleaning house" stage, especially when I stopped playing all those games.
And that is why I stopped playing Mafia Wars, Vampire Wars, YoVille, Farmville and whatever other games I was playing. All she had to say was, "sorry, no, I don't play that game..wonder how it shows that I do.."...something like that. Sounds like she's the one into drama with that email she sent. Totally not cool and uncalled for. Some people take FB way too seriously. I am like you. In the beginning I had friend requests left and right. Then I got to the "cleaning house" stage, especially when I stopped playing all those games.
Thank you for responding. FB really gets people hooked with these games. At one point, when I had a bad day at work, I couldn't wait to go home to play and get away from it all.
But the idea of having to befriend people I don't know makes it problematic. My fiance has over 1300 friends, most of whom he doesn't know.
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enough suspense already
