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She must be getting something emotionally from the guy. Otherwise it would be pointless to stay with him. Even though she is venting to you, she knows she has the option of leaving, and refuses to do it. Perhaps in her mind, she feels she can't do better or maybe he is good looking/good in bed/is going to inherit a fortune and she is willing to pay the price of keeping him by her side.
She must be getting something emotionally from the guy. Otherwise it would be pointless to stay with him. Even though she is venting to you, she knows she has the option of leaving, and refuses to do it. Perhaps in her mind, she feels she can't do better or maybe he is good looking/good in bed/is going to inherit a fortune and she is willing to pay the price of keeping him by her side.
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Actually, OP, the above is good fodder for her to think about! Tell her this!
She's probably getting from the relationship the same thing she saw her mother get from hers....and if she has daughters with this man....the cycle will be repeated.....
She must be getting something emotionally from the guy. Otherwise it would be pointless to stay with him. Even though she is venting to you, she knows she has the option of leaving, and refuses to do it. Perhaps in her mind, she feels she can't do better or maybe he is good looking/good in bed/is going to inherit a fortune and she is willing to pay the price of keeping him by her side.
Wow, if he was going to inherit some $ that would be great, but I know of this guy and no way! If he did, he would spend it before it hit the bank.He is always having her take out a loan for this snowmobile, a bow set, a car, an ATV, some expensive truck drivers course that she took out a loan for. In the meantime, she complains about not being able to go back to college. She is trying so hard to save up for their wedding and he always wants to spend the money on something else. NOW, that alone would set my radar off. The funny thing is, she is such an attractive young lady, smart and witty, but stupid when it comes to men. She likes those badboy types I guess! If it were me, I would kick him to the curb.
It drives me crazy when she talks about him, how much she loves him... What the heck is she getting from the relationship? Why do women waste their time with these kind of relationships and then to go get married and add a child to the mix.
Then don't listen to her. She's not going to change, and it's not your life or your relationship to worry about. Be there for her if and when they ever break up, but there's not much you can do other than end your friendship with her if it bothers you so much.
Do you really have to ask this question? You and your friend are morons to think this is even slightly normal. She has low self esteem. She really shouldn't get married or have children until she gets her head on straight.
Sounds like one of these women who don't have any self-esteem or standards for herself. Some women don't want to be alone and they will pay ANY COST to have someone around. The way you describe this couple.......she should have never even spoken to him. I wouldn't have. Men are not children or lost little puppies.....they are men. When a man has not direction, motivation, standards and goals he's like an idiot floating in life instead of taking charge of his destiny. Those with purpose should not be linked with those who are without purpose. Makes no sense.
I have a friend who has dated a guy for nearly 10 years, she wants to get married and have babies. I know it's useless to say anything to her, because when you wear rose colored glasses and have earplugs in, you don't see or hear anything someone says to you.
She is an excellent worker, very responsible. He on the other hand has had 6 jobs in the past 4 years, currently temporarily unemployed. They have 5 domestic pets that "she" takes care of, as well as doing all of the housework, takes out the garbage, cleans off her vehicle when it snows, does all of the cooking etc., Everyday she obsesses on what she is going to make him for dinner. She is a vegetarian, he isn't. He has recently joined the gym and works out for hours at a time (but can't help out at home). One day she left him a note asking him to please do the dishes, she got home dishes were not done. He shows her little affection. It drives me crazy when she talks about him, how much she loves him... What the heck is she getting from the relationship? Why do women waste their time with these kind of relationships and then to go get married and add a child to the mix.
He's a parasite...attached to a willing host. She has taken on the role of momma in his life and when she when she think she is dealing with a man, asking him to contribute to the workings of the house, he rebels like a spoiled little boy. She has made herself responsible for his support and he can't be bothered to wash his own dirty dish. And don't listen to her when she says she loves him...what she is expressing is not love, it's desperation, he has hooked her, emotionally or sexually or somehow and now she doesn't think she can live without him. She should do herself and all women a major favor and dump his belongings and his sorry you know what in the street. Just my two. But from what you've posted she would never hear the clink of the copper hitting bottom.
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